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    A Punchy Solution

    | Ireland | Technology, Theme Of The Month

    Me: “Hello, technical support, how can I help you today?”

    Customer: “Hi! I just received my new computer, and the button on the CD tray doesn’t work properly.”

    Me: “Okay, what exactly is the problem?”

    Customer: “I press the button, and the tray opens. I put the CD in, but when I press the button to close the tray, nothing happens.”

    Me: “Okay, so the tray is open now?”

    Customer: “No, it’s closed now.”

    Me: “How did you close it?”

    Customer: “Oh, I just gave it a punch!”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Initially Incorrect, But They Nipped It In The Bud

    | St. Louis, MO, USA | Funny Names, Language & Words

    (I work at a design firm. A few of our designers have special design achievements that are abbreviated in initials in a smaller script after their name on their business card. I am working in our showroom when a customer comes up to me with a question.)

    Customer: “Excuse me. I am looking for the young man I was talking to earlier.”

    Me: “Sure, we have several male designers here. Do you remember his name?”

    Customer: “No, but he gave me his business card.”

    (She looks around confused for a moment, then her face lights up when she remembers something.)

    Customer: “He has really small nipples!”

    Me: “Excuse me!”

    Customer: “Nipples.”

    Me: “Uhm… anything more descriptive?”

    (A look of horror crosses her face as she realizes what she has said.)

    Customer:Initials! After his name on his card, he has really small initials.”

    Messed Up Drink

    551510_372291846221863_1426874149_n

    I Demand A Redund!

    CRAZY-CUSTOMER
    Via. Thanks for the info, Patrick!

    Inking And Thinking

    | NS, Canada | Family & Kids, Health & Body

    (I am a young research nurse in an emergency department. I have a large, brightly-colored sleeve tattoo. A young girl—maybe 18 to 19 years old—is visiting a patient.)

    Coworker: “Hey, come in here a minute. These girls really like your tattoo!”

    (We go through the standard appreciation and explanation.)

    Girl: “My mom always said if I got a tattoo, I would never get a decent job. Now I can tell her she’s wrong!”

    Me: “Haha, yeah. I am living proof.”

    (The girl smiles from ear to ear.)

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