Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

Archive for 2013

Jump to page:

This One Cuts The Mustard

| Right | October 1, 2013

(I overhear an exchange while doing prep work.)

Customer: “Can I get everything on it?”

Coworker: “Sure thing.”

Customer: “Oh, wait, I don’t want mustard.”

Coworker: “Oh, I’m sorry, I already put it on there.”

Customer: “Oh… it’s okay.”

Coworker: “Are you sure? We can absolutely make you another sandwich.”

Customer: “No, no, I’m the one who said I wanted it on there!”

Coworker: “I promise, sir; I’ll make you a mustard-free sandwich.”

Coworker: “No, don’t even worry about it, please. I’ll take it as-is. It’s entirely my fault.”

Coworker: “Okay, sir, if you promise it’s okay! I’m sorry there’s mustard on it!”

Customer: “Oh don’t be silly; I’m the one who should be sorry.”

(I turn and look at another worker who looks straight at me.)

Me: “That guy is the best guy in the entire world.”

Second Coworker: “Yes. Yes he is. I think he deserves a medal.”

Doing A Number On The Wrong Number

| Right | October 1, 2013

(Our home phone number is only one digit different from a local supermarket. We get about one call a month intended for them. I’m about 14 years old.)

Me: “Hello?”

Caller: “I have a complaint.”

Me: “Uh… this isn’t—”

Caller: “You are all incompetent! Why is my delivery so late?”

Me: “Look this is a private number—”

Caller: “I have friends coming over! I’m hosting a dinner party, and I have no food because you are all useless!”

Me: “I’m sorry but—”

Caller: “I want to speak to your manager! I want—”

(I give up and hang up. The phone rings almost immediately.)

Caller: “HOW DARE YOU RANG UP ON ME, YOU B****!”

(I hang up again. The phone rings again.)

Caller: “GIVE ME YOUR SUPERVISOR RIGHT F****** NOW! I’M GOING TO HAVE YOUR JOB, YOU LITTLE S***!”

Me: “Oh, you want to speak to Mum or Dad?”

Caller: “…what?”

Me: “Like I tried to tell you: this isn’t [shop]; this is a home number.”

Caller: *very small voice* “…What?”

Me: “This isn’t [supermarket].”

Caller: “But… but… I called them! WHY ARE YOU ANSWERING THEIR PHONE!?”

(I hang up again, and tell my dad he is answering if she calls back. She does. It is a very short conversation.)

Bad Re-action Figure

| Right | October 1, 2013

(I am browsing the board games in the toy aisle. I am on the border of the action figures, and the dolls aisles. A mother and young daughter walk by.)

Mother: “Boys have so much cooler toys.”

Daughter: “What?”

Mother: “Don’t you want a boy toy?”

Daughter: “No!”

Honesty Is A Gift

| Right | October 1, 2013

(I work at a small museum that has a proportionally small gift shop. A girl who looks to be about seven years old walks up to the checkout.)

Me: “Hello, how may I help you today?”

(The only thing she’s holding is a silly little fortune teller fish made of thin plastic that costs 50 cents. It should also be noted that she looks terrified yet determined.)

Customer: “Hey, um, I actually wasn’t planning on buying anything, but I was looking at this fish thing and messing with it and then it ripped. And I don’t have any money with me. So… um…”

Me: “Oh, that’s so sweet of you! I know plenty of people who would have just stuck that in their pockets and walked right out. You know what, I’ll take care of that for you, and I’ll even give you a free gift card for being so honest!”

(The poor kid is so relieved it makes me laugh.)

Customer: “Oh, thanks, ma’am! I was so scared!”

Me: “No problem! It’s honest people like you that are going to go far in life! Have a good day, honey!”

(Totally made my day!)

Been Awake For A Maternity

| Right | October 1, 2013

(A scruffy looking customer comes into the store. He is wearing his pajamas, bright colored running shoes, and a scarf. He looks like he has not slept for weeks. He walks around the store for five minutes before coming to the line at the register. It is just after midnight.)

Me: “Good evening, sir.”

Scruffy Customer: *mumbles*

(He has three items: anchovies, asparagus in a jar, and bacon-flavored chips.)

Me: “Will that be all, sir? Do you want a bag for your items?”

Scruffy Customer: “No and yes, thank you.”

(He reaches for his pocket and takes out his car keys, ruffles around other pockets to look for his wallet, and finds nothing. Something breaks inside of him. He puts a hand to cover his eyes and is starting to turn away from me.)

Scruffy Customer: “I am sorry; she is going to kill me.”

(He starts to walk out. Another customer in line speaks up.)

Customer: “When is she due?”

Scruffy Customer: “What?”

Customer: “When is she due?”

Scruffy Customer: “In three weeks or so. How did you know?”

Customer: “Buying strange things in the middle of the night wearing pajamas. That is kind of a recipe for a guy who has a pregnant girl at home.”

Scruffy Customer: “Yeah, I guess so.”

(The scruffy customer starts to walk out again.)

Customer: “Hey, go get your stuff on the counter. I will pay for you.” *to me* “How much is it?”

Me: “Uhh… 76 kroner with my staff discount.”

Customer: “Wow, anchovies, asparagus and bacon flavored chips. She has got it bad!”

Scruffy Customer: “If it’s smelly, spicy or has a strange texture, she has to have it. I think she has tried everything in those categories. Except for shark meat, I think.”

(The scruffy customer smiles, and the other customers at the register give out a laugh. He thanks the customer for paying, and tries to get his information to pay him back. The other customers there start to talk to him, give him advice and try to lift his spirits. He now has a four-month-old daughter, and does not look scruffy anymore!)