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They Don’t Know Jack

| London, England UK | Extra Stupid, History, Movies & TV

(While working at an artefact exhibit for the RMS Titanic, I am standing by a list of all passengers and crew on board. The list is broken down by class and survived or lost. )

Customer: “This list is wrong. I can’t seem to find Rose’s or Jack’s name.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Rose DeWitt-Bukater, and Jack Dawson. I looked everywhere in the list, and they’re not there.”

Me: “No, they wouldn’t be.”

Customer: “Well that’s stupid. Rose should be in the first class list, and Jack should be in the third class. This is wrong.”

Me: “Because they’re not real.”

Customer: “No, I’m pretty sure they were.”

Me: “And I’m definitely sure they were not.”

Customer: “Well in the movie—”

Me: “In the MOVIE, Rose gives them a fake name and tells them she’s in third class. She would be listed as Rose Dawson if she existed. And Jack won his ticket in the first ten minutes of the movie, so his name would have not been on a record anywhere, which the movie pointed out in the first five minutes. And it’s a movie.”

Customer: “Next you’re going to tell me the Heart Of The Ocean is fake too!”

Me: “Yes, I am.”

Customer: “Then what did I spend £20 on? What a waste of money!”

Guy On The Corner

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Weekly Roundup: Mobile Madness!

Not Always Right | Roundups, Technology

Weekly Roundup: Mobile Madness! In this week’s roundup, we share five stories about customers and their cellphones!

  1. At Least It’s Hands-Free Now (2,146 thumbs up)
  2. Hit A Wall With This Caller (2,818 thumbs up)
  3. Daddy Meets Miss Demeanor (2,019 thumbs up)
  4. This Phone-y Claim Doesn’t Ring True (1,938 thumbs up)
  5. A Rude A-Blabbering (2,212 thumbs up)

PS #1: check out our Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

More Than You Bargained For, Part 5

| IN, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

Customer: “Just this DVD please.”

Me: “Okay, that will be $5.35.”

Customer: “No, I found this in the $3 DVD bin; it’s $3!”

(There are two DVD bins, one for $5 DVDs, and one for $3 ones. All DVDs have a sticker clearly showing their price.)

Me: “Well, sir, it could have been placed their by another customer, but it is still $5.”

Customer: “That is bull-s***! I don’t care what another customer did! I found it in the $3 bin, and I want it for $3!”

Me: “Sir, if you found a $3 DVD in that $5 bin, would you pay $5 for it?”

Customer: “F*** no! That’s stupid! Why would you—” *light bulb goes on* “—well, this is still bull-s***!”

Related:
More Than You Bargained For, Part 4
More Than You Bargained For, Part 3
More Than You Bargained For, Part 2
More Than You Bargained For

Jeepers Creepers

| Retail | Oklahoma City, OK, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Health & Body

(A customer approaches my register. I begin her transaction, as well as make small talk.)

Customer: “Can I ask you a question?”

Me: “Absolutely!”

Customer: “Do you have prosthetic eyes? My husband makes them and, yours just look so real!”

Me: “No, ma’am. My eyes are real.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Yep, my eyes are really real.”

(She turns deep red, but tries to laugh it off. We finish her transaction, and she leaves very quickly.)

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