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    Open For Hours And Hours And Jack Bauers

    | WA, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I worked at check cashing store that is open 24 hours a day. We only close for major holidays such as Christmas. One Christmas Eve, we are getting ready to close the store for the holiday and are asking the last customers to make sure the door shuts all the way behind them so that it’ll lock and no one else can enter.)

    Me: “Thank you sir, and we’re closing. So, if you could just make sure the door closes behind you, I would appreciate it.”

    Customer: “I thought you guys were 24 hours.”

    Me: “We normally are, but we close for holidays so that we can spend them with our families.”

    Customer: “That’s just ridiculous!”

    Their Purchasing Power Has Gone Up In Smoke, Part 2

    | Waynesboro, PA, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Underaged

    (I work at a gas station. We have a lot of rules to prevent under-aged people from getting cigarettes. I’ve just graduated from high school a few weeks before, and am still 17. A kid that I don’t really know, but goes to my old high school walks in with his mom.)

    Kid: “Hey, can I get a pack of [cigarettes].”

    Me: “I’m going to need to see your ID first.”

    Kid: “C’mon, you know me. We went to high school together.”

    Me: “Sorry, but if you look underage, I have to card you.”

    (He says he understands, and calmly walks out. His mom follows him out without buying anything. About two minutes later, she comes back in stays right at the newspapers near the door, and pretends to be looking around for about a minute, looking at the papers.)

    Lady: *loudly* “Oh, there it is.” *walks right up to the register*

    Lady: “I forgot to get the paper earlier.”

    Me: “That’ll be 75 cents.”

    Lady: “Oh, yeah. Can I also get a pack of [cigarettes]?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but your son just came in and didn’t have his ID. I can’t sell the same cigarettes to you right now.”

    Lady: “Well, what if they aren’t for him! They are for his dad.”

    Me: “Sorry, ma’am. It’s against store policy.”

    (She’s clearly angry at this point. My manager notices and is already on her way to the register.)

    Lady: “Well, I wanna see your manager!”

    Me: “The lady would like to speak to you.”

    Lady: “Yeah, this little a**hole won’t sell me cigarettes!”

    Manager: “Well, the problem is it’s against store policy to sell cigarettes to you since he had to deny your son.”

    Lady: “Well, in the state of Pennsylvania, it’s illegal to deny a purchase of any kind to a customer!”

    Me: “Actually it’s illegal to buy cigarettes for a minor.”

    Lady: “Well, I want to talk to corporate and tell them about this!”

    (My manager gets the phone under the register, calls corporate, and explains the situation. However, before my manager can finish talking, the lady grabs the phone from my manager.)

    Lady: *to the phone* “Yeah, can you tell these a**holes they have to sell me cigarettes?!”

    (We can hear the voice from the phone, and the moment corporate stops talking, the lady slams the phone down throws the paper at us.)

    Lady: “You can shove that paper up your a**!”

    Related:
    Their Purchasing Power Has Gone Up In Smoke

    A Slice Of Christmas Spirit

    | MA, USA | Food & Drink, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s the holidays. A woman comes in looking for sliced Christmas ham. She is on her cellphone. It is our policy to show the customers the first slice of any product to make sure it’s as thick or thin as they want.)

    Me: *holds up first piece of ham* “Ma’am? Is this okay?”

    (She waves me away impatiently, and continues gabbing on her phone. I try to get her attention again to no avail.)

    Me: *goes back to cutting ham* “Okay.”

    (I finish slicing two pounds of ham and put it on the counter. She is still on her phone, so I move on to the next customer. A few minutes later.)

    Customer: *shoves ham in my face* “What is this?”

    Me: “It’s the ham you ordered, ma’am.”

    Customer: “It most certainly is not! It’s too thick! Nobody can eat this!”

    Me: “With all due respect, you didn’t answer me. You waved, which I figured meant you okayed the first slice.”

    (She picks up the bag of ham and throws it into her basket on the floor, kicks the basket, and scoops it up, stomping off like a child.)

    Me: “And a very Merry Christmas to you, too!”

    Fails To Register

    | Nanuet, NY, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid

    (My store has three registers. I am stocking a shelf when a customer stops in front of the registers.)

    Customer: “Which register?”

    Me: “I can ring you up on the second register, ma’am.”

    Customer: *points to the third register* “That one?”

    Me: “No, the second one.”

    Customer: *points to the first register* “That one?”

    Me: “No, ma’am, the second register. This one here, with the light on.” *points at the second register*

    Customer: *angry* “Why isn’t this more clearly marked!? You should make it clearer which one is the one you’re on!”

    (Despite what I’ve said, she still walks over to the third register and drops her items on the counter. I walk over to the second register and put in my code.)

    Me: “I’ll take you over here, ma’am.”

    Customer: “You should’ve said that before I put my stuff down!”

    Putting Pickles Before People Will Put You In A Pickle

    , | Raleigh, NC, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s very close to Christmas and I’m on my break in the mall’s food court. The line I’m in is long; I notice there’s a customer with a young daughter throwing a fit, which is holding up the line.)

    Customer: “I specifically said no pickles! I’m a very busy woman; I don’t have time for you to correct your stupid mistake! You should have gotten it right the first d*** time!”

    (The customer continues to rant, at length, about how poor the service is and how she’s too busy to deal with it. This goes on for a few minutes while her daughter looks embarrassed and the rest of the customers in line are getting agitated. Finally, I decide to speak up.)

    Me: “Hey! Lady! It’s Christmas! We’re all busy. So how about you shut up, take the pickles off your own d*** sandwich, and stop acting like an a** in front of your kid? We all have lives we’d like to get back to!”

    (The customer tries to respond, but stops when she realizes the rest of the customers in line are applauding. She takes her food and drags her daughter off with a huff. The other customers actually push me to the front of the line, where the cashier looks nearly in tears, but is very relieved.)

    Cashier: “Thank you so much.”

    Me: “You’re welcome. Nobody deserves that kind of attitude today!”

    (The cashier gave me a free drink, and the man behind me in line insisted on paying for my order out of ‘The Christmas Spirit’.)

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