(A few years ago, around noon on Christmas day, several dozen Chinese people walked in to our Kosher deli style restaurant, apparently in a group. One walked up to the front desk.)
Man: *softly* “Is it okay if we’re here?”
Hostess: “Yes, we serve everyone, but are you sure you’re in the right place?”
Man: “This is [restaurant], right?”
Hostess: “Yes sir, it is.”
Man: “Well, we figured since you Jews are all coming to our restaurants tonight, we’d return the favor.”
Hostess: *slightly shocked* “Thanks. Right this way…we’ll seat you!”
(…and they’ve been back every year since!)
(
3,274 Thumbs Up!)
Customer: “How much are the belly-button rings?”
Me: “The prices vary depending on the style. I’d have to check if you’re interested in a specific one.”
(The girl walks over to her mom in an aisle within earshot.)
Mom: “How much are they?”
Customer: “She said they vary.”
Mom: “What is that supposed to mean? That I can’t afford them?!”
(
752 Thumbs Up!)
(I am making a lot of drinks. I place a drink on the counter and shout “green iced tea” so the owner of the drink can pick it up. A woman sitting with her husband at one of the tables, without any drinks, speaks up.)
Customer: “Is that a free iced tea?”
Me: “Green.”
Customer: “No, is that a free iced tea?”
Me: *enunciating* “Green.”
Customer: “Oh, sorry, I thought you said free, like someone had left it. I was like ‘I’ll take it!” *laughs*
Me: “What was your drink?”
Customer: “Oh, we didn’t order drinks. We were just sitting here…”
(
976 Thumbs Up!)
(A customer rushes in flustered.)
Me: “Can I help you today?”
Customer: “Yes, I need something, but I’m not sure what.”
Me: “Uh, okay. Is it an appliance, like a kettle or toaster, or are you after a TV or vacuum cleaner?”
Customer: *getting agitated* “No! I need something, you know to clean between my floor and ceiling!”
Me: confused “So…to clean the room?”
Customer: “You people are all the same, trying to sell me something every time I’m in here!” *storms out*
(
981 Thumbs Up!)
(I work in the footwear department at a sports store.)
Customer: “I would like to return these hiking boots.”
Me: “These boots look like they have been worn outdoors. I need a manager to approve this return.”
Manager: “Why are you returning these boots? Was there something wrong with them?”
Customer: “Yes, they kept tripping me…”
(The customer and her husband argue for about 5 minutes before finally my manager gets fed up and gives in.)
Manager, to me: “Could you please help this lady find some hiking boots that won’t trip her?”
Me, to customer: “Do any of these hiking boots catch your eye?”
Customer: “Oh, these are cute.”
(I turn to see her holding up a pair of boots identical to the pair she had just returned.)
Related:
Placebo Me, Part 2
Placebo Me
(
904 Thumbs Up!)
Loading ...