(I have just taken the customer’s name, phone number, and credit card info.)

Me: “To finish creating your account, I need an answer to a reminder question. In what city were you born?”

Customer: “That is way too personal.”

Me: “Okay. We have a few other questions. What is your pet’s name? What is your favorite television show? What is your favorite pastime?”

Customer: “Ask me my favorite pastime.”

Me: “What is your favorite pastime?”

Customer: “Making loooooooove.”

This story is part of our customers give TMI roundup!

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(This takes place when people still primarily use VCRs. A customer comes in, rents three tapes, and leaves. He comes back in the store, very upset.)

Customer: “You rented me the wrong size tapes!” *slams three video boxes onto the counter*

Me: “Sir, we only carry VHS tapes. Did you get a BetaMax?”

Customer: “I know what a VHS is! But, these don’t fit!”

Me: “Okay, let me check them.”

Customer: “Go ahead, try to put them in your machine!”

(I take the first box, open it, and begin to insert it into the front of the VCR.)

Customer: “Oh, you mean you have to take them out of the box first?”

This story is part of the Movie Rental roundup!

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(A customer comes up to me holding a package of naan bread.)

Customer: “What kind of bread is this?”

Me: “That’s just plain white naan.”

Customer: “They forgot the ‘L’.” *points to the words “Naan Pain” on the front of the package*

Me: “Oh, that’s French for ‘bread’.”

Customer: “So the flavor isn’t pain?”

Me: “No, sir, pain isn’t a flavor.”

This story is part of our Tongue-Tied-Customers roundup! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

13 Hilarious Stories About Customers Who Dialed The Wrongest Number Ever

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Caller: “I have an unauthorized charge on my account!”

Me: “Which charge is it?”

Caller: “The one from [Restaurant known for waitresses with ample sized busts]. That was a Sunday… I would never go there on a Sunday! Someone must have stolen my card. This is so insulting, to have this charge on there. I need you to remove it immediately!”

Me: “Sir, the date on your account summary is the date the charge cleared your account. The actual date of the transaction at the establishment was two days before, on Friday.”

Caller: “Oh… then that was me.”

Customer: “Oh, miss, I have a problem.”

Me: “What can I help you with?”

Customer: “The ATM took my card. It says here, though, that it’s invalid and my card is out of date, so maybe that’s why.”

(I get the keys to the ATM and open it up.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but your card is not in there. Are you sure it took it?”

Customer: “No, it did! It did! *pulls out an ATM card* “It looks like this! Oh, wait… this is my card. Never mind.”

This story is part of our “Florida Man” roundup!

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