(A customer notices the Egg Plants we have for sale. They are just eggs with soil and seeds in them; crack the top, water, etc.)
Customer: “These are cool. In time for Easter, eh?”
Me: “Oh yeah. People are liking them, so they’re selling well.”
Customer: “That’s cool. I may have to come back and get a couple for my nieces. BTW, when is Easter?”
Me: “Um, I believe it’s either April 5th or April 12th.”
Customer: “Oh, okay. Is it on a weekend this year?”
Me: “Um, sir… it’s always on a Sunday.”
Customer: “… really?”
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1,371 Thumbs Up!)
Sales | New Jersey, USA |
(My dad used to work part time at a tool and garden supply store; this happened around the holidays.)
My dad: “Hello, sir, can I help you?”
Customer: “Yeah, I need and extension cord, but I need one with prongs on both ends.”
My dad: “We don’t sell them. It’s very dangerous to have copper exposed at both ends.”
Customer: “Well, I need one. Can’t you make me one?”
My dad: “No I can’t, sir. It would be extreamly dangerous and unethical for me to make that for you. What do you need this for? Maybe I can help you find something else.”
Customer: “I NEED AN EXTENSION WITH PRONGS ON BOTH ENDS!”
(My dad suddenly figures out why the guy needs a double pronged extension cord.)
My dad: “Let me guess, you put the Christmas lights up backwards?”
Customer: “Yeah…” *stomps off*
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1,837 Thumbs Up!)
Customer: “Where are the bread donuts?”
Boss: “Um, sorry sir? All our donuts are a yeast base.”
Customer: “No, no, bread donuts! YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW YOUR OWN BAKING! BREAD DONUTS!”
Boss: “I’m not sure what you mean. I’m sorry, sir.”
(The customer storms off grumbling to himself and makes it about 10 feet.)
Customer: “Oh! Here they are.”
Boss: “Sir, those are bagels.”
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2,667 Thumbs Up!)
Me: “Welcome to ***, how may I help you?”
Customer: “Yes, I was calling about a corner fireplace you are supposed to have on sale.”
Me: “Yes ma’am, let me get you a price on that and check our stock.”
(I leave, check the sale price ($299), and come back to the phone.)
Me: “Ma’am?”
Customer: “Yes?”
Me: “Looks like the unit is $299.99 on sale.”
Customer: “WHAT? I have a piece of paper right here that says it should be $315!”
Me: “Oh, sorry. I said it’s on sale for $299.”
Customer: “What the h***, it says it right here on my piece of paper! Corner fireplace for $315!
Me: “Ma’am, $299 is less than $315.”
(There’s a very long silence.)
Customer: *click*
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2,832 Thumbs Up!)
Retail | Auckland, New Zealand |
(A customer walks out of our fitting rooms holding a top, and she has an angry look on her face.)
Customer: “This top is dirty, can I get a discount?”
Me: “It just looks like some of your makeup has rubbed off on it; I’m sure it will come out in the wash.”
Customer: “It isn’t makeup – can you give me a discount?”
Me: “Uh, I’m pretty sure it is.”
Customer: *getting louder* “It’s not OK! I dropped it on the ground and stood on it!”
Me: “You stood on it and made it dirty, and you want a discount?”
Customer: “…I’ll just go get another size then…”
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1,704 Thumbs Up!)
| Australia |
(A customer walks in with three cats. One of them is blind, one is shaved and one is dressed as a clown.)
Me: “Um…this is dog grooming.”
Customer: “I know, I want to leave my cats here for a year. I heard this was military school.”
Me: “…I think you want the kennel down the road.”
Customer: “No, there are penguins there! And bacteria!”
Me: “…”
Manager: *to me* “I just went down to the e-coli farm for some sea ice. Want some?”
Customer: *angrily* “WELL I NEVER!” *storms out*
Related:
Fighting Crazy With Crazy
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1,769 Thumbs Up!)
Female Customer: “Hi there! Where do you keep your ping-pong balls?”
Me: “Right over here.” *walks her over to them*
Customer: “Oh great! Now, where do you sell your Vaseline?”
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2,935 Thumbs Up!)
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