(While resetting a user’s password…)

Me: “Okay, the password needs to be at least seven characters long, has to have at least one upper case letter, one lower case letter, and one number.”

User: “What about an upper case number?”

Me: “…”

Related:
Ask A Stupid Question…
Ask A Stupid Question, Part 2
There Are No Stupid Questions, Just Stupid People
Yes, They Really Are That Dumb

Me: “Hello, this is ***.”

Caller: “Is this %%%%?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. You have the wrong number.”

Caller: “Oh, sorry.”

Me: “It’s okay…goodbye.”

(They hang up, but seconds later, the phone rings.)

Me: “Hello, this is ***.”

Caller: “Is this %%%%?”

Me: “No, you’ve dialed the wrong number again.”

Caller: “Oh, sorry.”

(The hang up … phone rings again.)

Me: “If you keep hitting redial, you’ll just keep getting the same wrong number.”

Caller: “How did you….oh!” *hangs up*

Related:
Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition

*lady swipes her card*

Lady: “Which button do I press? Credit or debit?”

Me: “Is it a debit or credit card?”

Lady: “Credit.”

Me: *face meet palm*

Related:
It’s Not Exactly Rocket Science

Me: “We’ve got a special offer on chocolate at the moment, if you’re interested at all?”

Customer: “Chocolate?! You know what? I will have some. I hope you’re happy. I mean, honestly…why do you think I have a weight problem, let alone the rest of the world?”

Me: “Sir, I didn’t say you had to buy it…”

Customer: “Well no, you didn’t, but I’m not going to turn down a special offer, am I?”

Me: “Would you like me to offer you a health bar instead?”

Customer: “No, I’ll take two chocolate bars.”

Customer: “Do you have anything without calories?”

Me: “Not except water, no. But I can make the baked potato with chili beans with no butter, making it more low-fat than anything else you’ll be likely to find around here. ”

Customer: *rolls eyes* “Well, if that’s the best you can do…”