(While installing a street light pole)

Lady: “Is this going to take long?”

Me: “Ma’am, I need to you step back.”

Lady: “But is this going to take long? I need to get to my car.”

Me: “Ma’am… I need to you step back.”

Lady: “Is there someone else I can talk to?”

Me: “Ma’am… you have a 1-ton concrete pole directly over your head. If it drops, you are going to die. I need you to please step back.”

Lady: “Okay… but can I get to my car?”

Me: (I yell to my job foreman) “…Hillbilly!”

Hillbilly: “GET THE F*** OUT!”

Lady: “I never met anyone so rude.”

Customer: “Two tickets for Madagascar.”

(After the previews, he returns.)

Customer: “I want my money back!”

Me: “What seems to be the problem, sir?”

Customer: “You have the wrong movie playing in there. It’s a cartoon. Where’s the cars?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, cars?”

Customer: “NASCAR! I wanted to see Mad about NASCAR!!”

Me: “Let me get the manager…”

Customer in the drive-thru: “Hi, I’d like a BK Veggie.”

Me: “Sir, you’re at Hardee’s, not Burger King. We don’t have any vegetarian entrees.”

Customer in the drive-thru: “Oh, okay. Thanks anyway.”

(Customer sat there for a few minutes before driving away.)

Customer: “So you’re sure you don’t have any small hot dogs?”

Employee: “Yes.”

Customer: *points to hot dog grill further down the counter* “Well, what about those ones over there then?”

Employee: “No, they’re just further away.”

This story is part of our Extra-Stupid-Customers roundup!

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Me: “Hello, welcome to [Sandwich Shop]. What kind of sandwich can I get for you?”

Customer: “Uhh… I’ll get a club.”

Me: “Would you like a six-inch or a footlong?”

Customer: “I don’t know. How long is a footlong?”

Me: “It’s a FOOT LONG.”