Well, Both Places Don’t Get A Lot Of Sunlight

(I’m a teaching assistant working with 9- to 10-year-olds. The kids are working on stories meant to develop their use of adjectives and causal conjunctions (“because of,” “as a result of,” etc.), which involve writing about how fictional creatures went extinct. One of the girls asks me to check her work, so I pick up her workbook and start reading aloud from it.)

Me: “It is a well-known fact that vampires used to live on Uranus.”

(As this is an unusual opening statement even by the standards of their writing, I give her an appraising look. She looks me in the eye, face perfectly straight, and says…)

Student: “I’m not talking about the planet.”

(I immediately started corpsing and had to leave the room in order to laugh out loud. The delivery was absolutely killer.)