Common Courtesy Goes Up In Smoke

(A woman comes in to get a refund on a purchase she had just made about ten minutes ago. However, our company does not offer refunds—only store credits or exchanges.)

Customer: “I don’t want this anymore. Give me my money back.”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, I can’t give you your money back. It’s company policy, but I would be more than happy to let you exchange the item or receive a store credit for the same amount.”

Customer: “No! I said I want my money back. No exchange, no store credit. I want cashback.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. That’s not possible.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous and illegal! I want my money back right now. I need to buy some smokes!”

Me: “I’m sorr—”

Customer: “How am I gonna get my smokes now? I have no money now to buy them because I bought this shirt. So, are you gonna give me some smokes? Do you have any smokes for me?!”

Me: “No, ma’am, I don’t smoke. I’m sor–”

Customer: “You better buy me some smokes or give me some money to buy smokes, or else!”

Me: “Ma’am, you need to relax. I’m sorry, but there’s nothing I can do for you.”

Customer: “Are you gonna give me some smokes?!”

Me: *speechless*

Customer: “Well are you?! You took my smoke money and now you won’t give it back, so you better give me some smokes instead. You stole from me!”

Me: “Ma’am, I don’t smoke. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “Whatever! Give me a store credit then. I guess I’ll have to go without smokes today!”

(I perform the return and issue a store credit.)

Me: “Have a good night, ma’am.”

Customer: *leaves in a huff, cursing and swearing about smokes*