Honesty In Marriage Can Get You All Choked Up

(My husband and are going for a walk. We stop at a convenience store and end up grabbing a 3 for $5 snack deal.)

Me: “Chocolate covered peanuts for you, chocolate covered raisins for me, and you can go choke on the gummy bears.”

(The clerk stops putting the items in the bag, looking shocked.)

Me: “Oh, I’m not being mean! He eats them and chokes because he doesn’t chew them properly.”

Husband: “It’s true.”