Me: “We’ve got a special offer on chocolate at the moment, if you’re interested at all?”

Customer: “Chocolate?! You know what? I will have some. I hope you’re happy. I mean, honestly…why do you think I have a weight problem, let alone the rest of the world?”

Me: “Sir, I didn’t say you had to buy it…”

Customer: “Well no, you didn’t, but I’m not going to turn down a special offer, am I?”

Me: “Would you like me to offer you a health bar instead?”

Customer: “No, I’ll take two chocolate bars.”