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    Chairlike People And Other Objects, Beware

    | Nova Scotia, Canada |

    Me: “Thank you for calling *** Support, how can I help you?”

    Customer: “Okay, well, you know how the laptop computers look like chairs?”

    Me: “I guess I can kinda see how you could possibly think that…”

    Customer: “Well, I sat on it, and now it’s broken.”

    Me: “Unfortunately, any sort of warranty will not cover accidental damage on the computer.”

    Customer: “It wasn’t accidental.”

    Me: “If you sat on it, then it is considered accidental damage.”

    Customer: “It’s NOT accidental damage! You think somebody just sits on their computer by accident?!”

    Me: “Okay… so the computer is damaged, right?”

    Customer: “YES!”

    Me: “So, what would you like me to do for you?”

    Customer: “I want you to fix my computer! It’s broken!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but any personal damage done to the computer is not covered under warranty. I can possibly send it in to be fixed, but there will be a charge.”

    Customer: “It’s not personal damage! I sat on it!”

    Me: “If you sat on the computer, than you damaged it personally, and it is not covered under warranty.”

    Customer: “Are you calling me fat?!”