Featured Story:
  • Always Time For A Rhyme
    (2,223 thumbs up)
  • Category: Funny Names

    If there’s one common mistake that all stupid customers have made, it is that simple error of getting a name wrong. Be it a product, a person, a store or a place, these simplest of gems often have the most horrific and memorable results…

    Willy Always Was A Bit Wonky

    , | Chicago, IL, USA | Food & Drink, Funny Names

    Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

    Customer: “Yes, I would like an oompa loompa.”

    Me: “Oompa loompa?”

    Customer: “Yes, one of those caramel apple oompa loompas!”

    Me: “Do you mean an empinada?”

    Customer: “That’s exactly what I said.”

    A Tourist Traveling To Terror Incognita

    | Ashburn, VA, USA | Family & Kids, Funny Names, Movies & TV

    (I’m working as the ticket tearer when two young kids come up and ask me a question.)

    Kid #1: “Our parents were in a different movie. They said they would be out first, but they aren’t here. It’s been a long time.”

    Me: “Okay, do you know what movie they saw?”

    Kid #2: “It was the terrorist, they went to see the terrorists!”

    Me: “Oh! The Tourist with Johnny Depp. That won’t get out for another 10 minutes.”

    Kid #1: “No it was the Terrorist! They said there was bombs and gangsters so we had to see Tangled instead.”

    Me: “Well we don’t have that movie, so I’m sure it was the Tourist.”

    (Kids walk away to wait. I overhear them.)

    Kid #2: “What’s a tourist?”

    Kid #1: “It must be the terrorists’ friends!”

    Walking Carpets Tend To Be That Way

    | Illinois, USA | Food & Drink, Funny Names, Movies & TV

    (I am a customer having lunch at a cafe near my office. I overhear two teen girls at the table next to mine.)

    Customer #1: “I don’t like this Chewbacca sandwich.”

    Customer #2: “Um…what?”

    Customer #1: “This Chewbacca sandwich. It’s too tough.”

    Customer #2: “I think you mean ciabatta.”

    Time To Get Your Head(er) Checked

    | Logan, UT, USA | At The Checkout, Funny Names

    (Note that I am wearing a name tag with my name on it. At the top of our receipts, it says ‘Your Cashier Was’ and lists my name)

    Customer: *looks at receipt* “Your name’s Footer? That’s a strange name.”

    Me: “Uh, no. My name’s [name], like it says on my name tag. Why would you think my name was Footer?”

    Customer: “Because this receipt says your name is Footer!”

    Me: “May I see that?”

    Customer: *hands me the receipt*

    Me: “It has the right name here at the top.”

    Customer: “No, down at the bottom.”

    (I look at the bottom of the receipt. It says “Footer: Thank you for shopping at [store], have a nice day!)

    Pray There’s No Back Door

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Funny Names, Health & Body

    Customer: *referring to the recital hall* “Excuse me, can you direct me to your Rectal Hall?”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Customer: “The Rectal Hall. I need to get into your Rectal Hall. Where is your Rectal Hall?”

    Me: “I sincerely doubt you want the answer to that question.”

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