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    Category: Funny Names

    If there’s one common mistake that all stupid customers have made, it is that simple error of getting a name wrong. Be it a product, a person, a store or a place, these simplest of gems often have the most horrific and memorable results…

    Eulogyology

    | Lancaster, PA, USA | Books & Reading, Funny Names

    Customer: “Excuse me, do you have an ‘ology’ section?”

    Me: “Are you looking for biology, psychology, sociology?”

    Customer: “No, just ‘ology’.”

    Me: “I’m not sure what that is. Maybe you could explain it to me?”

    Customer: “You know, speeches people give at funerals.”

    DJ Freud, Featuring The Oedipus Complexes

    | Houston, TX, USA | Family & Kids, Funny Names, Rude & Risque

    (I work in the beauty department and a customer comes up to me).

    Customer: “I need a face wash for my son that will get rid of the semen on his face.”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    Customer: “Are you deaf? He is too oily!”

    Me: “You mean sebum?”

    (The customer turns the brightest shade of red and runs out the store.)

    You’ll Have To Connect At Baked Alaska

    | London, UK | Funny Names, Tourists/Travel

    Me: “Hi, would you like to buy a ticket?”

    Customer: “Yes, when is your next flight to Oregano?”

    Me: “Oregano?”

    Customer: “Yeah, it’s in America. I think it’s a state?”

    (On my computer, I find the Wikipedia page for Oregano.)

    Customer: “Oh…I’m not dumb, I swear…”

    Undeserved Credit

    | Ohio, USA | Funny Names

    Me: “Thank you for calling. How may I help you today?”

    Caller: *yelling* “I want to make sure that idiot woman I spoke with a little while ago credited my card back because I think she was stupid and didn’t know what she was doing!”

    Me: “Okay, I’ll be happy to check on that credit for you today. After looking at the account, it looks like it was credited back to the credit card as stated it would be.”

    Caller: “Are you sure that idiot did it? She sounded like a liar to me!”

    (After looking closer at the account, I see it was me who spoke to her last.)

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, I did take care of that credit just like I said I would when you called me a little while ago.”

    Caller: *silence* “Uh… I knew you would. You’re such a sweet girl!”

    Rich Has Checked Out

    | Michigan, USA | Funny Names

    (This is an independent bank with only four loan officers.)

    Me: “Here’s you receipt. Are you all set?”

    Customer: “I need to speak with my loan officer for a minute.”

    Me: “Okay, that’s Joe. Let me check if he’s available.”

    Customer: “No! Rich is my loan officer.”

    Me: “No, Joe is. He talked to you last week, remember? Tall guy with a moustache?”

    Customer: “Rich has been my loan officer for eight years. I want to speak with him!”

    Me: “Rich died three years ago.”

    Customer: *silence*

    Me: “So, I’ll get Joe?’”

    Customer: “Right, Joe.”


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