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    Category: Wild & Unruly

    Please Do Not Yank The Employees

    | New Jersey, USA | Wild & Unruly

    (I am working as a frozen food clerk in a supermarket. I have long hair. As I am stocking, I feel a tug on my pony tail.)

    Me: *turning around* “Um, can I help you with something?”

    Customer: “No, it’s okay. I just wanted to tug your hair!”

    Me: “Uh, okay. Thanks?”

    Related:
    Please Do Not Lather Up The Employees
    Please Do Not Creep Out The Employees
    Please Do Not Titillate The Employees
    Please Do Not Pet The Employees

    Should’ve Ripped You A New One

    , | Birmingham, AL, USA | Awesome Customers, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I work at a really nice Country Club on the golf course side of things. Since it is a nice club, it isn’t unusual to get fairly large tips every once in a while.)

    Me: “Hey mister, could you break a hundred for me so we split tips tonight?”

    Member: *clearly inebriated* “Sure, man, I can totally break that hundred for you!”

    (I hand him the hundred dollar bill which he then proceeds to rip in half and then hand back to me.)

    Member: “There! I broke it for you.” *walks off laughing with his friends*

    Other Member: “Man, what an a**hole. Here’s another hundred for the ripped one. I appreciate y’all.”

    (I took the ripped hundred to the bank and they replaced it. I tried to give the other hundred back, but the member refused and said we earned it!)

    A Bad Run For Their Money

    | Minnesota, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Top, Underaged, Wild & Unruly

    (My coworker is serving a group of five teenaged guys. All are very loud, obnoxious, and annoying. They don’t order a lot of food, and finally get up to leave. I am putting in an order then this happens…)

    Coworker: *to me* “THEY ARE RUNNING! THEY ARE RUNNING!”

    Me: “Did you get the license plate number?!”

    Coworker: “Yeah, right after the last guy paid, I noticed there was still one seat open with just a short stack of pancakes. I asked the guy’s friend if his friend was coming back to pay. He turned beet red, said “Yeah,” and that he would go get him. The car already was backed up and waiting when he walked out the door so I went to get the plate numbers quick.”

    Me: “Okay, give me the numbers. I’ll call it in.”

    (I call the police and give them the license plate and description of the car. About five minutes later, an officer shows up and gets a description of the guy who walked out on his bill. He says they may have the kids, and he will get the money for us. Ten minutes later, the officer shows up again.)

    Officer: “Here is the money for the bill. His friends had to pay for it so he wouldn’t get a ticket.”

    Me: “I was hoping you would have brought him up here to face his crime.”

    Officer: “Normally, that is what I would do. However, when we pulled them over for not paying the bill, we noticed the smell of alcohol. They are currently getting minors for underage drinking.”

    (In Minnesota, the fine for underaged drinking is $200. In the end, four of them were under age and drinking and got tickets for it. The bill he walked out on was only $4.55!)

    These Aren’t The Bags I’m Looking For

    | England, UK | At The Checkout, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m working New Years Eve on the tills when three rather older women come into the store. After I serve them, the door alarm goes off right after they leave. My manager goes to investigate.)

    Manager: “I’m sorry, ladies, but I’m going to need to check your bags and receipts in case you took something.”

    Woman #1: “No, we didn’t take anything. We swear!”

    Manager: “Well, I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to ask you to come back into the store and your bags be searched.”

    Woman #1: “No, we haven’t stolen! Look!”

    (Suddenly, the women—all in their fifties at least—begin to lift up their long skirts and tops and pull down their bras a bit. Not finding anything, my manager lets them go and comes back into the store.)

    Manager: “Thank God I get to go home and get drunk soon. I need a stiff whiskey to get those images out of my head!”

    Breaking Peter To Fix Paul

    | Eden Prairie, MN, USA | Wild & Unruly

    (I work as a cashier at an electronics retailer. A customer walks up with a computer lapdesk that opens up so it can store small items. Normally, two clips hold these shut.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, one of the two clips is broken off.”

    Me: “Oh geez, I’m sorry! Do you wanna grab another one that’s not defective?”

    Customer: “Sure…” *leaves the broken lapdesk with me*

    (I give the broken one to a fellow cashier so they can take it back to the service desk and defect it out. Several minutes later, the customer returns.)

    Customer: *holding a new lapdesk* “Hey! Where’s the other lapdesk?”

    Me: “Oh, I gave it to customer service because it was defective. We can ring this up now—”

    Customer: “But I need the first one!

    Me: “Wait…why?”

    Customer: *holds up a lapdesk clip* “I broke one off the new one to put on the old one!”

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