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    Category: Wild & Unruly

    Cower Before My Shower Of Flowers

    | Ontario, Canada | Wild & Unruly

    (I am standing at the cash register of our store. A customer comes up and asks about our tulip bulbs, so I point them out and she goes over to them.)

    Customer: “Well, aren’t you going to help me count them out?

    Me: “Sure, ma’am, how many would you like?”

    Customer: “500, obviously. You can’t expect me to do that on my own!”

    Me: “Sure, ma’am, I’ll help you for the moment.”

    (As we reach the 200-tulip mark, three other customers finish their shopping and line up at the cash. I’m the only cashier, so I go to help.)

    Customer: “Hey! Where do you think you’re going?! I don’t have 500 yet!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I need to ring these people through. I’m the only cashier on duty. I can help you again once I’m finished.”

    Customer: “You b****! You said you would help me, and now you want to back out? I can’t believe this!”

    (Suddenly, the customer throws her bagged tulips onto the floor, scattering them everywhere. She then grabs handfuls of bulbs from the bin, throws them around the store, stands up, and marches out.)

    So Much For Spit & Run

    , | Copenhagen, Denmark | At The Checkout, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (In our store, all cash registers have a button that’ll ring a bell in out lunchroom and back room if a cashier is in danger. I hear the bell ring, and run out to find my boss, who has also run out to check on the cashier.)

    Boss: “What happened?”

    Cashier: “A customer threatened to beat me over short change, even though I gave him the correct change. He just left a second ago!”

    (My boss and I walk out the store and quickly spot the customer in question. He’s not hard to miss, as he’s now cursing at his wife.)

    Me: “Did you threaten my coworker?”

    Customer: “Yeah. So?!”

    Boss: “I’m gonna have to ask you to come back in with us so we can sort this out.”

    Customer: “F*** you!”

    (The customer runs across the road, so my boss and I run after him as quickly as possibly. We finally catch up with him on the park lawn on the other side of the road.)

    Boss: “[My name], grab his bags.”

    (Before I can react, my boss has tackled him from behind using an American football tackle and hammerlocked him before picking him up from the ground.)

    Customer: “When we get to the back room, I’m gonna punch your lights out!”

    Boss: “You’re welcome to try.”

    Customer: *shuts up*

    (We call the cops, and after a few minutes they get here. We explain everything as his wife pleads with the cops.)

    Cop: “We’re gonna let you off with a 300 kroner ticket if you apologize to every—”

    Customer: *spits on cop* “Screw you!”

    Cop: “…and now, you’re going to jail!”

    Weekend Roundup: When Customers Attack!

    , , , , | Not Always Right | Roundups, Wild & Unruly

    When Customers Attack! This week, we share stories of unruly customers who prefer (violent) action over words!

    1. Bull In A China Shop:
      Sticks & stones may break my bones, but naked, guitar-throwing customers can really hurt me!
    2. Acute Mental Failure:
      HULK CAN’T FIGURE OUT HOSPITAL DOOR! HULK SMASH!
    3. (Full) Front(al) Desk:
      Can’t check into your hotel room, lady? Just mentally check out by ripping off your clothes and running in circles!
    4. Fudge In Flight:
      A customer airs their fudge frustrations by sending their ice cream sundae airborne.
    5. Marriage: The Ultimate Slippery Slope:
      Here’s to throwing your belongings in the air like you just don’t care!

    PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    Super Fries Me

    | Hawaii, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m working as a register for a fast food restaurant.)

    Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

    Customer: “I would like an extra large fries.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, we have discontinued the extra large fries, sir.”

    Customer: “Just dump the fries into an extra large cup and give it to me!”

    Me: “Um, let me go check with my manager if that’s all right.”

    (While he waits, the customer behaves oddly and starts doing a jig in front of the counter. My manager says to give the customer what he wants.)

    Me: “My manager has agreed to serve you the fries in an extra large cup.”

    Customer: “Thank you!”

    (I ring him up for an extra large soda, and then hand him the cup of fries with the lid on. He pays and inspects the cup.)

    Customer: “I also need you to put soda and ice cream in here. These fries are too dry!”

    Manager: *hesitantly* “Okay…”

    (My manager takes the cup, pours soda and dispenses some ice cream onto the fries, and hands him a fork and spoon as well. The customer walks over to a table and begins eating.)

    Customer: “This tastes funny! I want a full refund!”

    Manager: “I’m sorry, sir, I cannot do that—”

    (Suddenly, the customer throws the fork and spoon at us and spills some of his cup onto the counter trying to get it on me. He then goes outside and throws the cup into the window, splattering its contents everywhere, before storming off.)

    This Car Is Past Its Break-in Period

    | New Jersey, USA | Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I am a customer in a used car dealership looking to trade in my car. Another customer has been looking at my car for a few minutes.)

    Customer, to salesman: “Can I test drive that green Saturn at the end of the lot?”

    Salesman: “That’s a customer’s car. We don’t own it.”

    Customer: “Okay. Can I test drive it?”

    Salesman: “No.”

    (I’m standing close by, laughing at the whole conversation, when my dad comes to tell me he found a nice car in my price-range, so we go to look at it. Five minutes later, I go back to my car to see the same woman trying to pry the window down.)

    Me: “Excuse me, what are you doing?”

    Customer: “I want to test drive this car, but the salesman refuses to give me the keys!”

    Me: “That’s my car. I own it.”

    Customer: “Oh. I thought he was just saying that to spite me.”


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