Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Calling At All Stations To The 19th Century
    (1,560 thumbs up)
  • July Theme Of The Month: Animal Madness!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Wild & Unruly

    Carting Her Off To Justice

    | Woodinville, WA, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Wild & Unruly

    (I am shopping at a popular grocery and am in the long line to check out. I notice a cart nearby with a kid. It starts rolling into a shelf. I grab it before any damage is done.)

    Me: “Hey, whose cart is this with the kid?”

    (I see a woman at the meat department with a phone, talking away. I believe she has a purse that matches the coat on the cart.)

    Me: “Ma’am your kid almost rolled into—”

    (She waves me off and continues talking on the phone. I sigh, reposition the cart, then get back into the line.)

    Customer In Front: “Stupid woman, leaving her kid to roll off to God knows where.”

    Me: “I hope the phone call is worth the—”

    (I notice the cart rolling again, so I stop it. This time, the woman notices.)

    Woman: “What are you doing to my kid you… you… kidnapper!?”

    Me: “I was stopping the cart.”

    Woman: *snatches the cart from me* “Stay away from my baby.”

    Customer In Front: *laughs* “Well, least she paying attention now.”

    (The woman continues glaring at me. A few minutes pass, and the customer in front is done being checked out. However, I’m surprised when the woman and two cops approach me.)

    Woman: *points to me* “There he is, the kidnapper!”

    Officer #1: *to me* “Alright bub, let’s go.”

    Officer #2: *getting cuffs out* “I got him.”

    Customer In Front: “Woah, officers! Stop! You haven’t even heard his story!”

    Woman: “He tried to kidnap my baby! That’s the story!”

    (The two officers talk to people in the line about what happened, and are eventually convinced about my side of the story.)

    Officer #1: “Ma’am, please put your hands on the counter.”

    Woman: “What! What for? I’m not a kidnapper! I refuse!”

    Officer #2: “Please work with us, not against us.”

    Woman: “Arrest that man for kidnapping!”

    Officer #2: “Ma’am, you are under arrest for abandoning a minor, and for endangering a minor. We will contact your husband or a relative at the station to get your child.”

    Woman: “I’m innocent! He was kidnapping!” *she screams all the way out*

    Courage Under Fire, Part 2

    | Harrogate, Yorkshire, UK | Bad Behavior, Theme Of The Month, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I am a supervisor at a car contract hire leasing company. The fire alarm goes off, so I call to my colleagues to apologise, hang up their calls, and leave NOW. One colleague is left as everyone files out. She is trying to talk over the very loud sound of the fire alarm.)

    Colleague: *to customer on phone* “I’m sorry, the fire alarm is ringing and we have to evacuate. If you give me your number, I’ll call you back after.”

    (I can hear the sound of irate shouting from the customer on the phone.)

    Colleague: “Yes, but the fire alarm is ringing and we’re evacuating. If you won’t give me your number, can you call back later?”

    (Sounds of more irate shouting.)

    Colleague: “No, that’s the fire alarm. I can’t turn it down.”

    (Sounds of yet more shouting.)

    Colleague: *to me* “I don’t know what to do.”

    Me: “Leave by the fire exit now.” *I take the phone*

    Me: “Hello, I’m [name] and I’m the supervisor. The fire alarm is ringing. It’s not a drill and I’m going to have to terminate this call.”

    Customer: “Where’s the f***ing b**** I was just talking to? I want her f***ing name. I will not be f***ing treated like this! It’s only a quick f***ing query, why won’t you f***ing answer it, you bunch of f***ing c****?!”

    Me: “This building is on fire as far as we can tell. Call back later.”

    Customer: “All I f***ing want is for someone to work out my early termination fee. That’ll only take five or ten minutes. What’s f***ing wrong with you people?”

    Me: “The fire brigade is here.” *sound of sirens outside* “Frankly, sir, and I mean no disrespect, but people like you are not worth dying for. Call back later.”

    Customer: “How dare you! I’m f***ing paying your f***ing—”

    (I hang up and run down the fire escape. A few hours later, once the fire on the roof was put out the customer called back. He was very apologetic; he’d told his wife about the outrage he’d suffered. She pointed out how much of a dick he had been. He decided she was right.)

    Related:
    Courage Under Fire

    Hit A Wall With This Caller

    | WA, USA | Technology, Wild & Unruly

    Me: “Thank you for calling [cellphone company]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “My cell phone isn’t powering on.”

    Me: “Well, let’s see what’s going on with that.”

    (After troubleshooting the problem turns out to be a warranty issue. Unfortunately, the customer’s warranty has run out.)

    Customer: “Well, is there anything I can do? Don’t I have insurance on my phone?”

    Me: “Yes you do, but the insurance only covers physical damage or a lost or stolen phone.”

    (Suddenly, I hear a load crash over the phone.)

    Me: “What was that?!”

    Customer: “There I was, just minding my own business, when suddenly my wall tried to attack me! My phone, knowing it was about to die, heroically jumped in front of me taking the full force of the wall’s assault. Sadly, it has now broken in half.”

    Me: “Well! Let me get you over to our insurance department while you prepare a Viking funeral for our brave hero!”

    Customer: “Do I actually need to burn it?”

    Me: “No, but it will drive the insurance people crazy!”

    Paging Charlotte On Aisle 5

    | NJ, USA | Pets & Animals, Wild & Unruly

    (I am at the cashier, ringing up a long line of people. I notice when customers walk in, they suddenly skirt around the theft detectors. A lady approaches the counter.)

    Lady: “There is a big spider in the entrance!”

    (Note: I don’t want to leave the counter because of the enormous line.)

    Me: “Okay, cool.”

    Lady: “You have to kill it. You work here.”

    Me: “It’s not hurting anyone.”

    (The lady’s husband chimes in.)

    Husband: “Kill it, she’s right!”

    (Everyone in the line seems to agree with the lady and her husband.)

    Me: “Okay, I’ll just move it outside.”

    Husband: “No, kill it!”

    Me: “No, it wont do any harm out there in the parking lot.”

    (I move the spider outside.)

    Lady: “I can’t take it anymore!”

    Me: “Can’t take what?”

    (Suddenly, the lady grabs a basket made for carrying products outside and finds the spider. She starts violently smashing the red basket on the spider.)

    Lady: “Why is it not dying?!”

    (It turns out the basket has little legs on the bottom, preventing it from making contact with the spider. She eventually figures this out and kills it, but not before it charges her one last time and causes her to flip out!)

    Forever Unatoned

    | Richmond, VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (Being close to a bad part of town, we’d often get unruly kids with nothing better to do than to hang out in our store. It is usually the same group of kids, and they always happen to break something during every visit. After breaking a football game display (by cleverly playing football with it), we issue a permanent ban. The following takes place within a year. The next day…)

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “Why won’t you let us in?”

    Manager: “You keep breaking our stuff.”

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “F*** you! I’ll break what I want!”

    Manager: “And that’s why we banned you. Leave. Now.”

    (A week later…)

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “Let us in! We’ll be good!”

    Manager: “Not happening.”

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “Fine, this place sucks! We’ll go to the other store, then you’ll be happy!”

    Manager: “Will you buy something from there?”

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “No.”

    Manager: “Then I don’t care where you go.”

    (A month later…)

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “Hey man, it’s been a month. We’ve learned our lesson. Let us in or we’ll tell our parents!”

    Manager: “We have enough video surveillance saved of you guys to press charges. You really want to let your parents know about this?”

    (They leave silently. A few months later…)

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “Hey, I’m not sure if you heard, but the manager unbanned us!”

    Me: *calling their bluff* “He’s in the back, let me check.”

    (He actually had the day off. The gang runs away. Finally, a year goes by, and we haven’t seen or heard from the kids at all. When they show up, my manager is about to kick them out, when I interject.)

    Me: “Listen, I think these kids got the message that we’re serious. They haven’t bothered asking to be let in for a whole year, and here they are, politely asking to be let back in. Let’s give them a second chance!”

    Manager: “Fine, but they’re your responsibility.”

    Me: *to the kids* “Alright guys, it’s been a whole year, and I’d like to think you learned your lesson. I convinced the manager to let you in, but do anything bad again, and it’s back to being banned. Deal?”

    10-year-old Gang Leader: “Deal.” *he then drops his pants and flashes a group of adults*

    Me: “BANNED FOREVER, AGAIN!”


    Page 34/61First...3233343536...Last