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    Category: Wild & Unruly

    Desist The Tourist Assist

    , | Bali, Indonesia | Comics Single, Health & Body, Tourists/Travel, Transportation, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m Indonesian and I live in an area where there are lots of tourists. Being Bali itself, there are barely any traffic laws enforced and lots of tourists tend to rent out scooters and treat them like toys. I’m turning into my favorite restaurant at a T-junction with no red light and my blinkers on, and today I felt like being extra cautious since the scooter I borrowed is my friend’s. I slow down and see a tourist and her son far away in the opposite direction but as I cross from the other side of the street, I see her actually speed up in her attempt to pass me when clearly there is a hump coming up. It’s rainy season so the roads are wet and of course when she tries to brake while going 40 miles/hour the bike violently slides. I am watching the whole thing since I have already parked my motorbike. Luckily no one was badly hurt.)

    Me: “Are you all right, lady?”

    Tourist: “This is your fault, you stupid girl! That was an illegal turn!”

    Me: “Well, no, that wasn’t illegal. This is a two-way road.”

    Tourist: “You apologize and you go pay for my bike!”

    Me: “No, you were going too fast on rainy day. I had my blinkers on and clearly about to turn in. I saw you and you were far away.”

    Tourist: “I don’t care! I have an international license!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but that doesn’t mean anything, especially when you drive like that! I’m sorry this happened though. I suggest you go to the mechanics. They’ll fix up the scratches and it’s really cheap. Don’t go to the place where you rented the bike or they’ll make you pay $100.”

    Tourist: “So you admit it? It’s your fault!”

    Me: “I meant sorry this had to happen to you, not sorry my bad. Lady, I did nothing wrong. In fact I was actually trying to help you out!”

    Tourist: “No, this is your fault! You owe me money! YOU OWE ME MONEY!”

    (I look at the bike, it’s brand new but with a few scratches because of the crash. While the argument just goes back and forth, her son is clearly huddled under a tree crying and also he was wearing NO helmet while riding on the back with his mother.)

    Tourist: “THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! WHY DID YOU DO THAT? YOU OWE ME MONEY OR I’LL CALL THE COPS!”

    Me: “Lady, go ahead. I’m not worried. But clearly the money seems more important to you than your son who could be injured.”

    (She looks at her son who is in shock. She asks him if he’s all right and takes a second to check for any bleeding and then goes back to me.)

    Me: “If you’d like I can point you towards the closest hospital or clinic.”

    Tourist: “NO! You owe me money! You are just a stupid girl! I’m calling the cops! Give me your address, phone number, and the money!”

    Me: “Lady, I have no money! Not on me and certainly not enough in the bank and if I did I wouldn’t give any of it to you! I’ve offered to go to the mechanics with you but I’m not paying a cent for your own negligence! I’m a painter, lady! I’m broke!”

    Tourist: “Well, I’m broke, too!”

    Me:” Right, you’re so broke you rented a brand new bike during your vacation in Bali. Here let me call the police for you.”

    (At this point I decided to call my boyfriend’s mom, a cop who is head of the district we’re in. As I’m calling I began to tear up a bit from all the frustration. I wait on the phone for a good five minutes until the tourist gave up and asked me for my number to show her a good mechanic. And after that full hour of arguing, she didn’t even feel it important enough follow through on the mechanic BECAUSE SHE WAS LATE FOR A MASSAGE!)

    Life Without Coffee Is A Scream

    , | QLD, Australia | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Wild & Unruly

    (I am a customer at a local coffee shop. There are several people in line behind me, so I order and pay and then step out of the way while the barista makes my drink.)

    Barista: “One [drink I ordered]!”

    (I didn’t think my drink would be ready so quickly given how busy they are, but nobody else steps forward, so I take it.)

    Me: “Thanks!”

    Angry Lady: “What the h***? That’s my coffee!” *to the barista* “This woman just stole my f****** coffee!”

    Me: “Oh, my gosh, was this yours?”

    Angry Lady: “Of course it’s f****** mine! F*** you! What gives you the right to take my coffee?”

    Me: “I’m so sorry. I ordered the same thing, and nobody stepped up to take it so I thought it was mine.”

    Angry Lady: “F*** you! You’re just a broke [racial slur] loitering outside a coffee shop trying to steal other people’s food! You should be ashamed of yourself!”

    Barista: “Actually, ma’am, this lady ordered and paid for the same drink as you. She has already apologised for her mistake, and if you just wait a moment, I’m making her drink now and you can take that one.”

    Me: “I’m really sorry. I’d give this back but I already took a sip. If you take my drink we’ll both have what we ordered.”

    Angry Lady: “I don’t want your f****** coffee. I want mine!”

    Barista: “Ma’am, they are exactly the same, and please stop cursing. There are children here.”

    Angry Lady: “Go f*** yourself!”

    (She grabs the coffee out of my hand, flings it on the ground at my feet, throws the empty cup at the barista, and then storms off without a drink.)

    Barista: *shrugs* “Shame she chucked that coffee on the ground. I think she needs it!”

    (She finished making my drink. The angry lady was nowhere to be seen, so I took it and left. It was the best coffee I’d had all week!)

    When The Customer Gets Tough, They Have To Get Going

    | Ridgewood, NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Wild & Unruly

    (We close at 9 on Sunday nights. At about 8:15, a customer calls and says she has a few items to return, and will be in shortly. She shows up at 8:45 and dumps $60 worth of stuff on the service desk.)

    Customer: “You just do my return and I will grab a few things and come back here.”

    Me: “Okay, but be advised we close in 15 minutes and I am going to need your ID and signature because this is going to be over $25.”

    (I make the 15-minute closing announcement. The customer walks away, ignoring me. I ring in the return, make the 10-minute, 5-minute, and closing announcements, then go walking through the store trying to find this woman. I finally find her in the very last aisle, with a cart FULL of groceries.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but we are now closed. We’ve been closed for five minutes at this point. You’re going to have to stop at the desk, sign for your refund, and head to the register because I and my cashier would like to go home.”

    Customer: “YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO. I AM THE CUSTOMER—”

    Me: “Ma’am, I can. And the laws in this county say YOU. NEED. TO. GO.”

    (She then made some ungodly noise, almost ran me over with her cart, snatched then signed the refund form, and stalked her way up to the register… all the while complaining about how rude I was because she was so important and this was the only time she had to go grocery shopping. Once she finally left, my cashier told me she said ‘that little b***h is lucky I’m not 10 years younger because I would have kicked her a** for making me leave.’)

    Renamed And Shamed

    | UK | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Wild & Unruly

    (This takes place at our order collection till. The system is down and as such we can’t check whether customers’ orders are in or not. It’s also close to Christmas and we’re full of customers. A woman approaches my till.)

    Me: “…and what name—”

    Customer: *quotes her order number*

    Me: “Sorry, ma’am, our system is down. Can I please have the name it’s under?”

    Customer: “[Customer].”

    Me: “And how many items is it?”

    Customer: *sighs* “Can’t you just check?”

    Me: “Sorry, like I said our system is down. How many items are you expecting?”

    Customer: “One.”

    Me: “Okay, ma’am. I’ll go get it for you.”

    (I go into the stockroom and search under the initial of her last name. I can’t find any under her name. So I go back to the customer.)

    Me: “Hi, sorry. I can’t seem to find your parcel. Can you just write down the full name it’s under?”

    (Customer writes it down, sighing the whole time. I go back and still can’t find the parcel.)

    Me: “Is it possible it could be under another name?”

    Customer: “No! I think I know my own name! What kind of stupid question is that?!”

    Me: “I understand. It’s just, sometimes—”

    Customer: “Just go back and check! You know this is supposed to be a faster option! I’ve been waiting in this line for half an hour.”

    Me: “I apologise, ma’am.”

    (I go to the stockroom for the third time. This time asking for the delivery team to help me find it. They tell me to leave and cover other customers. while they continue searching. I go to the customer and tell her the delivery team are looking.)

    Customer: “You know, I’m getting sick of waiting!”

    (She continues ranting at me and ‘terrible service at this store’ until her phone rings.)

    Customer: *on the phone* “I’ve been waiting for ages! They’re all useless! It can’t be that hard to find a parcel for [Customer]. It’s not exactly a common name.”

    (Suddenly the customers face goes white and she looks away from me.)

    Customer: *hangs up phone* “It… er… it may be under [Different Name].”

    (Lo and behold it was under Different Name. And, surprise, surprise – I didn’t get an apology.)

    Just Not Feeling Those Fees

    | The Philippines | Extra Stupid, Money, Wild & Unruly

    (I work in a call center industry in Manila, Philippines. We cater to customers in Europe; most likely in the United Kingdom. We handle an online site where they buy and sell some of their items. Normally, customers are being charged for advertising their items on the site depending on for how much they sold their item.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Online Site] customer support. You’re speaking with [My Name]. How can I help you today?

    Customer: *mad and loud voice* “Why the f*** am I being charged for listing my car on your website, when it says you have free listings today?”

    Me: “I do apologise for the inconvenience and misunderstanding regarding on the information you saw. Let me check what happened.”

    (I place the customer’s call on hold, and check on his listing.)

    Me: “Thank you for patiently waiting, [Customer]. Upon checking on your ad, you placed your car on sale in our site, and if you tried reading our notification before you place your advertisement online, it will show you how much you’ll be charged once the car was sold.”

    Customer: “What the f*** are you talking about? You said it was free listing day, I don’t understand. You f***ing mislead customers!”

    Me: “[Customer], let me walk you through in listing your items and I’ll show you the note at the bottom before you list your item online.”

    Customer: “Sure! I bet you’re f****** stupid and don’t know what you’re talking about. Go on and walk me through.”

    (As I walk him through, I show him where he can see the fees.)

    Me: “Now look at the bottom part of the page before clicking the button ‘save’ to advertise your item online; you’ll see that [Our Site] is excluded during Free Listing Days.”

    Customer: “Oh!” *seems ashamed, but still keeps shouting* “You should make that note larger! And you should know that the reason why I’m selling my car is that I don’t have any money! You stupid piece of s***! How can I have money if you’re going to charge me for this, huh?”

    Me: *still calm* “[Customer], I understand that you’d like to have the money in a whole amount. However, like what you saw when I walked you through, you will be charged no matter what happens.”

    Customer: *still shouting* “I won’t pay your d*** fees! I want to speak with your manager! You’re an idiot and I don’t wanna talk to you!”

    Me: “All right. Let me place your call on hold for a couple of minutes while I transfer you to my manager.”

    (I talk to my manager/supervisor and tell him what has happened. Then he takes the call)

    Manager: “Thank you for patiently waiting, [Customer]. My representative told me that you’re having concerns with your listing fees and he already explained what had happened. Is that correct? Can you explain more what happened?”

    Customer: *explains his issues for more than 10 minutes, over and over again*

    Manager: “I do apologise [Customer], but we only follow protocols that were given to us. And everything was clear that you will be charged for listing your call no matter what happens.”

    Customer: “Well, f*** you! F*** your rules! I will not pay you!”

    Manager: “If that’s the case, our collections department will be the one who’ll get in touch with you.”

    Customer: “F*** you! I’ll sue you! I’ll go to your place and kill you!” *click*

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