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    My Eyes Advise That Your Size Defies

    | Fort Worth, TX, USA |

    (I’m working in the fitting room of a popular clothing store. A customer enters with several pairs of shorts.)

    Me: “Found some items you liked? I’ll start a fitting room for you.”

    Customer: “Yeah, I’m not sure if these will work.”

    Me: “I’ll be happy to switch the sizes out for you if these don’t work out.”

    (She enters her fitting room and starts trying on her shorts. After a few minutes, she comes out wearing a pair that are WAY too small for her.)

    Customer: “Oh, no…these won’t work!”

    Me: “You’re right. A different size would work better.”

    Customer: “Oh good! I’m glad you agree. These are a 6…can you get me a 2 and a 4?”

    Me: *mouth hanging open*

    Oh, The Inhumanity

    | Boston, MA, USA |

    Customer: *looks at my name tag* “Hmm…’Karen’. I didn’t realize you guys had names.”

    (I assume the customer means he didn’t realize we have name tags.)

    Me: “Oh, yeah…we always have name tags in case you ever need to ask for us.”

    Customer: “No, I didn’t know all you people who worked here had names. It’s neat!”

    Feeling Man-strual

    | Edmonton, Alberta, Canada |

    (I am working the prescription counter when a big, burly 6-foot or so tall man comes to the counter. Note: I am a female.)

    Me: “Hello, how can I help you?”

    Customer: “Um, I think…” *trails off*

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir…could you say that again?”

    Customer: *leans in close* “I think I got my first period.”

    Me: *speechless*

    Customer: “I’m bleeding down there, and I’m really hurting in my stomach.”

    Me: “Sir, men don’t get those. You need to go to the hospital.”

    Customer: “I knew you girls would be insensitive! I’m leaving!”

    (I didn’t see him again. I still hope he got to a hospital!)

    A Fitting End

    | Canada |

    (Note: Our store sells a lot of larger items that don’t fit in the bags we have. Most cashiers are able to judge what can and cannot fit.)

    Me: “So, that’ll be [price].”

    Customer: “Can I get a bag for [awkwardly shaped purchase]?”

    Me: “We actually don’t have any bags that would be able to fit that.”

    Customer: “Oh, you’re just being lazy! Hand me that bag and I’ll make it fit!”

    (I hand her the bag as requested as she mumbles about “learning respect”. She struggles to try and fit the bag over the giant box whose edges are jutting out. However, after a few minutes of struggle, she finally gives up.)

    Customer: *defeated* “I’ll be paying with debit…”

    Disin-jean-ous Or Just Un-capris-hending

    | Sydney, Australia |

    Customer: “Can you tell me if this pair of pants is discounted?”

    (I scan the pants.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, but these are full price.”

    Customer: “But that sign says, ’40% Off Jackets and Vests’!” *looks at me expectantly*

    Me: “Yes, I can see that.”

    Customer: “Then these pants must be 40% off!”

    Me: “Ma’am, it’s 40% off jackets and vests.”

    Customer: “So?”

    Me: “Pants aren’t jackets nor vests.”

    Customer: “Really?!” *walks away, perplexed*


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