May Theme Of The Month: Movie Mayhem!

Category: Uncategorized

Pissing Against The Wind Is An Art Form

| Columbus, OH | Uncategorized

Male Customer: “Two for American Gangster…we have 2 free passes.”

Me: “I’m sorry sir, but that movie just opened today and it isn’t currently accepting passes. To use these I’ll have to charge you $1.50 upgrade per ticket.”

Male Customer: “That’s ridiculous. It doesn’t say that anywhere on it.”

Me: *pointing to where it says that* “I’m sorry sir but it does. I’ll have to charge you the $3.”

Female Customer: “But we came early so we knew you wouldn’t sell out! Why can’t you just give it to us?”

Me: “I’m sorry but its a corporate policy. I cannot give anyone a free pass to this movie, not even employees. It’s not even an option on the computer.”

Male Customer: *mumbles under his breath while he reaches for his wallet*

Female Customer: “We shouldn’t have to pay $3 to see the movie! If there’s more than 25 people in there I’m going to report you to a manager!”

Third Time’s A Charm

, | Oregon, USA | Uncategorized

(Our mall opens at ten, so the restaurant does not serve breakfast)

Customer: *gazes at menu board* “I’d like an Egg McMuffin, please.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, we don’t serve breakfast at this location.”

(Customer, still gazing at menu, which lists no breakfast items)

Customer: “Well, can I get an order of Hotcakes and Sausage?”

Me: “Ma’am, we do not serve breakfast here since we can’t open before ten.”

(Customer ceases looking at menu board gazes at me for a moment)

Customer: “You don’t serve breakfast?”

Me: “Uh…no.”

Umm … Check The Produce Aisle

| Unknown Location | Uncategorized

Customer in the frozen food aisle: “Do you have ice cream?”

Someone Needs A Trip To The Warhol Museum

| Texas | Uncategorized

(Note: this customer is yelling at me over something stupid in the first place)

Customer: *pause* “Who is that on your shirt?”

Me: *slightly taken aback by the change in subject* “… Ernesto “Che” Guevara.”

Customer: “Who is that?”

Me: “A Cuban revolutionary.”

Customer: “My husband is Cuban … would he know about that guy?”

Me: “Yeah.”

(Lady calls her husband and talks to him for a second)

Customer: “My husband says he is a communist … are you a communist?!”

Me: “Only on paper, ma’am.”

Customer: *blink blink* “I don’t get it!”

Me: “I didn’t think you would.”

Because Everything’s Bigger In Texas

, | Los Angeles, CA | Uncategorized

(Note: the shop is really, really small, and is inside the same building as a supermarket.)

*lady walks into store with shopping cart*

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am, could you leave your cart outside? It’s blocking other people from getting inside the store.”

Lady: *moves her cart filled with unpaid merchandise outside the store*

Me: “I’m sorry, you can’t take unpaid merchandise outside the store either.”

Lady: “I’m sorry. I’m from Texas!”

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