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    Tripping About Shipping

    | Monroe, CT, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Transportation

    (I work in a factory office that sells school supplies around the country. We receive purchase orders via e-mail, regular mail, and fax. Most of the calls we receive tend to be about checking the status of deliveries and orders received.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How many I help you?”

    Caller: “I would like to say that the way you shipped out my order is unacceptable and not according to what I requested in the fax. I demand to be compensated!”

    Me: “Okay, I apologize for the inconvenience. May I have the purchase order number so I can look into it, please?”

    Caller: “Yes, it’s [number].”

    (Her account has several notations, mainly about reps trying to contact the customer about her order which has over $400 worth of goods. She requested in her fax that she wanted her order divided up into four separate shipments, one for each teacher that the goods are to go to. Company policy won’t allow us to do that as doing so will increase shipping costs. The last notation reads that a rep spoke with the school secretary and explained the company policy about shipments. She was advised she could choose to either have everything shipped together or she could fax separate purchase orders with each teacher’s name. The notes showed she chose the former option.)

    Caller: “That’s unacceptable! I did not give permission to do that. You should have asked for me specifically.”

    Me: “According to these notes, the rep did and got the secretary instead.”

    Caller: “Sir! The secretary does not have permission to make changes to purchase orders. You should have asked for me! I should be compensated for this.”

    Me: “With all due respect, ma’am, that’s not company error. The secretary should have told you what happened.”

    Caller: “Don’t you think you should’ve told her to let me know?”

    Me: “Ma’am, she’s your secretary! It should go without saying that if she gets a call about your order, if she makes a change to it she should let you know. It’s not our error if she doesn’t do that. I’m sorry, but according to these notes the rep did ask for you. He did explain the situation to the secretary and he asked her if she had authorization to make changes to the order. She said yes and the changes were made.”

    Caller: “Well, I’m telling you now she should not have done that!! That rep should have asked for me specifically because the order is now ruined! It’s four other secretaries and I sorting out over six boxes of products that are scattered everywhere. It’s a complete mess that is taking too much time. I have to deal with all this aggravation because of your incompetence.”

    Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way. As I explained before, company policy won’t—”

    Caller: “I DON’T GIVE A F**** ABOUT WHAT YOUR COMPANY POLICY SAYS! I’m pissed the f**** off!”

    Me: “Ma’am, there’s no need to yell and raise your voice like that. Please be advised if you continue to use that language and tone this call will be disconnected.”

    Caller: *scoffs* “This is so aggravating! I’m so upset. I should return everything and make you pay for the return shipment.”

    Me: “Please be advised that we’re not going to do that as you placed this order out of your own volition. At no point in this phone call did you state you received incorrect merchandise. Also, be mindful that it would take more effort on your part to package everything up and return back versus you already going through the process of sorting out the merchandise.”

    Caller: “This is nonsense! I should call the Better Business Bureau on you people and my secretary!”

    Me: “You’re going to complain to the Better Business Bureau that we correctly filled your order, that your secretary did not inform you of our phone call, and the secretary that either you or your school hired didn’t do your job?”

    (The caller let out a huge scream, then hung up. When I checked on the account later on in the day notes were left stating she spoke with a manager who told her the same thing.)

    A Sad Sign Of The Times

    | Houston, TX, USA | Extra Stupid, Politics, Transportation

    (I walk into the local shipping store to drop off a package. There is a senior couple in front of me. I overheard the last part of the conversation between the wife and the employee.)

    Wife: “So, you’re telling me that this store doesn’t have that promotion?”

    Employee: “No, I’m sorry. We’re privately owned, so we’re not carrying out the promotion.”

    Wife: “Well, you should have signs here telling me that!”

    Employee: “Yeah, I’m sorry…”

    Wife: *walks towards the exit while her husband slowly follows her behind him* “This is the seventh store I’ve been to that doesn’t have the promotion. Liars. They’re all LIARS! Just like OBAMA! He’s a LIAR! OBAMA! LIAR!”

    Husband: *looks at me and shrugs, embarrassed*

    Lawless And Clueless

    | FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal, Transportation

    (I work as a receptionist at a retirement home.)

    Resident #1: “I want you to call the police right away.”

    Me: “Um. May I ask why?”

    Resident #1: “I called for a taxi and it still isn’t here. I want the police to arrest the driver.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry about your wait but I don’t think the police should be involved with something like that.”

    Resident #1: “I don’t care. I’m a very important person. I have connections. Call the police.”

    Me: “Why don’t I call the taxi company to see where it is? I mean, it’s not like the driver can break traffic laws just to pick you up.”

    Resident #1: “I am above the law. With one word I can get this whole company shut down. I can—”

    Resident #2: *slowly walks up to desk with walker* “Is that your taxi outside?”

    Resident #1: “Ah, yes. Goodbye.”

    Resident #2: *waits until the first resident leaves* “What a b****.”

    Returns From The Dead

    , | Pasadena, MD, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Technology, Transportation

    (At the auto parts store I work for we offer free battery charging for any car/truck/boat batteries as long as they do not test bad.)

    Customer: “I’d like to get this battery charged please.”

    Me: “Okay, let me just test it real quick.”

    (This battery looks like crap, but it’s not leaking so I go ahead and test it.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, but this battery is not good. It has a bad cell in it. I can’t charge it.”

    Customer: “What do you mean it’s bad?! This battery is pretty much new. You need to charge anyway.”

    Me: “Not gonna happen. It is actually dangerous if I try to charge this.”

    Customer: “I demand you charge this right NOW!”

    Me: “No. Your battery is dead; no amount of charging is going to bring it back. You will need to get a replacme—”

    Customer: “I SAID, CHARGE IT!”

    Me: “No.”

    Customer: “Well, I demand to—”

    Me: “I am the manager. I will NOT charge this battery. It has a bad cell, and there is no way this battery is anywhere near new. Judging by the inch worth of grease around the case and the ungodly level of corrosion on the terminals, I would say this battery is at least 7-8 years old. And If I were to attempt to charge this over sized paperweight, there is a chance it could explode and cause serious damage to the people around it.”

    Customer: “But—”

    Me: “No.”

    Customer: “But—”

    Me: “Not happening.”

    Customer: “Crap… but I can’t afford a new battery.”

    Me: “Look, give me a chance to check the back. We do have a used battery program, and I may have one in stock.”

    (I walk in the back and find a used battery that fits the customer’s car.)

    Me: “I found this one in the back. Now it is classified as used, but that just means that someone returned a battery with no problems to it, but we can no longer sell it new.”

    Customer: *brightens* “Really? How much?”

    Me: “$43.”

    Customer: “Really? That’s great! I was worried that I was going to have to spend hundreds on a new battery. Thank you so much!” *buys battery and leaves*

    Me: *to coworker* “Why do people always demand we bring dead things back to life?”

    Coworker: “I don’t know, but let me know when you figure out how to do that.”

    Trying To Stamp Out Stupid

    | West Hartford, CT, USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid, Top, Transportation

    (I am friendly with our neighborhood postal delivery lady, and always chat with her when taking the dog out for his afternoon walk. She was telling me about the new neighbors that just moved in.)

    Postal Lady: “Hey, how are you doing?”

    Me: “Good. Yourself?”

    Postal Lady: “I tell you, I have to deal with some pretty stupid people on my job. You’re going to like this. Do you know where the new neighbors just moved in?” *points to the house*

    Me: “Yeah. What about them?”

    Postal Lady: “Well, the other day, when I was when I was delivering their mail, the lady came screaming, waving her arms, running out of her house, because she wanted to ask me if she wants to mail something what does she need to do.”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Postal Lady: “So I tell her if she puts something in the mailbox, just put the flag up. Then she asked, ‘What flag? You never gave me a flag!’ So I showed her, by moving it up and down. She responded, ‘I don’t think that you are very intelligent. That is NOT a flag. A flag is a piece of fabric on a pole. This is just piece of plastic!’”

    (I start laughing.)

    Postal Lady: “Wait, it gets better. Today, when I delivered her mail, the ‘flag’ was up. And in it I found this:”

    (She showed me an envelope with a hand written address, and where the stamp should have been was a square that read ‘First Class Mail: No Stamp Needed of Mail in the USA’ that was cut out of a piece of junk mail and taped on to the envelope.)

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