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    Category: Transportation

    Putting His Own Spin On It

    | WA, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Transportation

    (I work in a gas station. An older customer comes in, and starts ranting at me. A younger male customer stands behind her, waiting for her to be done.)

    Older Customer: “You know most vehicles have their gas nozzle on the driver’s side of the car, right?”

    Me: “Well, I can’t really say one way or another but—”

    Older Customer: “You should put more pumps on the left side so the MAJORITY of people can use your pumps.”

    Me: “I don’t really underst—”

    Older Customer: “It’d really be easier if you just made more on the LEFT SIDE, because all the cars have it on that side.”

    Me: “Well, ma’am, we DO rotate the pumps every six months.”

    Customer: “Oh! Well all right then!”

    (The older customer walks out cheerfully.)

    Younger Customer: “You… rotate them?”

    Me: “Yup, pick ‘em up, swivel ‘em around, set ‘em back down.”

    Younger Customer: “Well played…”

    Extra Reserves Of Stupidity

    | Fairfax, VA, USA | Hotels & Lodging, Transportation

    (I’m about to move into a new apartment. The parking situation at this complex is pretty relaxed. It allows guests/non residents to park there during the day, in any spot that isn’t reserved for residents who pay extra for their spots. I go to the leasing office to pick up my keys. I’m about to go up to the counter, when a woman bursts into the office and yells at the receptionist.)

    Woman: “Excuse me! I think my car was just stolen!”

    Receptionist: “Stolen? Oh my gosh! Where was your car?”

    Woman: “I was at my friend’s home for just a few minutes. I come outside, and my car is gone. It’s just gone!”

    Receptionist: “Well, do you think you may have parked it in a reserved space? We have a tow truck come in to clear cars in reserved parking spaces.”

    Woman: “What? No one told me not to park in such a space! Besides, my friend is out of town so she couldn’t even tell me not to park there. And besides, I was only inside for a few minutes!”

    Receptionist: “I really do apologize, ma’am. Let me find out what I can.”

    (The receptionist tries her best to calm the woman down, and calls the contracted tow company. She gives them a description of the car.)

    Receptionist: “Yes, ma’am, they did tow your car. You had parked it in a reserved space.”

    Woman: “This is ridiculous! I have an appointment in 30 minutes; I shouldn’t have to be dealing with this!”

    (The receptionist is trying to be as accommodating as possible. I end up taking a seat, realizing I’m not going to be getting any help until this is resolved. The receptionist disappears into the back office to get approval to order a cab, and even have the property offer to pay for it. As soon as she leaves, the woman looks at me.)

    Woman: “It’s like we’re living in a police state. It’s totally unbelievable! People are waiting in the bushes for the littlest things. You know, I was just feeding my friend’s cats! No good deed goes unpunished.”

    Me: “I’m moving in today, and a few weeks ago when I came here for the first time, I knew better than to park in a space that had ‘RESERVED’ written on it in large letters.”

    (The woman shuts up and waits for the girl to come back. She was not necessarily calmer, but she did tone down her ranting!)

    Bus(ted), Part 2

    | UK | Transportation

    (I’m sitting near the back of an almost empty bus. The only other passengers are a teenage couple sitting near the middle of the bus. An elderly passenger approaches.)

    Elderly Passenger: “I’d like to sit here.”

    Teen #1: “Pardon?”

    Elderly Passenger: “I would like to sit here. I’m old, so you have to move.”

    Teen #1: “I don’t think that’s how it works.”

    (The elderly passenger starts shouting.)

    Elderly Passenger: “How dare you? You young yobs shouldn’t even be on the bus; you’ve got healthy legs! And now you won’t give up your seat for someone who needs it more!”

    Teen #2: “Sorry, are you blind as well as rude? The bus is empty. There are plenty of seats much closer to the front than this one, and you have no right to ask us to move. And secondly, we paid just the same as you did. We have just as much right to be on here as you do.”

    (The elderly man goes to say something, but seems to reconsider and takes a seat closer to the back of the bus.)

    Related:
    Bus(ted)

    Challenging Customers Throw You A Battery Of Tests

    | ON, Canada | Awesome Workers, Bad Behavior, Top, Transportation

    (I have just gotten off of work, and am enjoying my meal as I wait for my ride home to finish their shift. I get a call in the break room from the customer service clerk; he seems a bit flustered.)

    Customer Service Clerk: “Are you okay to clock back in for an emergency sale to a hostile customer?”

    Me: “I’ll be right up.”

    (I put my uniform back on, and clock in. I go to the main desk.)

    Customer: “About f****** time someone helped me properly!”

    Me: “I’m sorry for any confusion or undue hassle, sir. What can I help you with?”

    Customer: “My f****** truck won’t start, and I think it’s the battery. The lights don’t even come on, and I sure as h*** don’t want to be stranded in this f****** place’s parking lot! Get me a new battery!”

    (I lead him back towards my department to get the proper car battery for him.)

    Me: “Can I ask for the year, make, and model of your vehicle?”

    Customer: “Why?”

    Me: “It is our usual policy to find the exact battery.”

    (He gets into more of a huff. We find the right battery and I ask for his info to do up the proper paperwork.)

    Customer: “What the h*** do you need all this for, anyway?”

    Me: “Well, we just need to make sure we take care of our customers properly. When it comes to vehicle maintenance, we take it seriously, so we don’t end up messing things up and making you have to deal with more trouble.”

    (He gets huffy again, but I take down the required info.)

    Customer: “Well, that’s over. Oh, wait… d*** it!”

    Me: “What’s wrong, sir?”

    Customer: “I don’t have any tools to take out the old battery and stuff!”

    Me: “Well, hang on for another moment, and I can go get them. Then I will take your old battery out, and replace it with the new one. That way you can get out of here, and back home to do what you planned on doing.”

    (He narrows his eyes at me, but nods and waits for me at the desk. I go get the tools, and come back so he can lead me out to his vehicle. I do just as I said I would. I even wish him a good evening after all is said and done. The next day he comes back in. I see him making his way back to my department while I’m still working. He’s smiling somewhat sheepishly.)

    Me: “Hello again, sir! Is everything okay?”

    Customer: “Yeah, everything’s great! Heck, the truck runs a bit better now, too. It’s been years since I had to change the battery. I just wanted to apologize for how angry I was last night, and for how I treated you.”

    Me: “Well, it’s no big deal, sir. I can imagine you’d had enough hassle form the situation.”

    Customer: “Yeah, you got that right. Look, I think you’re an outstanding young man, and I want to thank you for helping me out in a pinch.”

    (He shakes my hand, but I notice the feeling of paper also being handed to me in the handshake. I look down in my hand and see a $20 bill.)

    Customer: “That’s for dealing with my grumpy old a**. Thanks again!”

    If Cars Could Run On Stupidity

    | ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Transportation

    Me: “Thank you for calling roadside assistance; how may I help you?”

    Elderly Lady: “Yes, I need you to get my car started; it won’t start.”

    Me: “Okay, ma’am, can you try to describe the problem to me?”

    Elderly Lady: “Well my husband used to drive, but now he’s passed, so I have to drive again, and this stupid car won’t start.”

    Me: “Alright, can you take the phone and go to the car. Try to start it, so I can listen?”

    (The elderly lady starts grumbling as she goes to the garage.)

    Elderly Lady: “So, I put the key in, and this happens.”

    (The car tries to turn over, but nothing happens. I’m trying to figure out what it could be, and am about to dispatch a tow truck.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I need to you turn the key just a little bit, and tell me if any lights come on.”

    Elderly Lady: “One with a box and a squiggly line.”

    Me: “Okay, I need to you look on the dashboard and find the letters E and F.”

    (The elderly lady is very angry now, as we’ve been on the phone a while and she’s running late.)

    Elderly Lady: “They are right beside the box with the squiggly part.”

    Me: “Perfect, now where is the line pointing to?”

    Elderly Lady: “The E. Why, what the h*** does that mean?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry to tell you this, and I can send help, but your car is out of gas. You need to put gas in the car.”

    Elderly Lady: “You mean to tell me that I spent $50,000 on this car, and I still have to put gas in it?!”

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