Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Re-Fill You With Joy
    (1,563 thumbs up)
  • September Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Transportation

    Needs A Crash Course In Common Sense

    | UK | Crazy Requests, Transportation

    (A customer is involved in a minor collision outside the restaurant, which blocks the narrow road. I go out to help and see that there is glass all over the road. I check to see if both parties are okay. While I talk to them, a car pulls up behind them.)

    Me: “Sir, are you okay, are you hurt? Stay there while I call an ambulance.”

    Driver #1: “I’m fine thanks, just a bit shaken up.”

    Driver #2: “I’m not hurt either, but my windscreen is shattered and we’ll need to call the insurance company.”

    (As Driver #2 goes to carry on speaking, the third driver in the car behind butts in.)

    Driver #3: “Excuse me, are you guys going to just sit there all day? I have an appointment to get to and you’re not going to make me late!”

    Me: “Sorry, but as you can see there has been an accident and I need to check if these people are hurt, and then we will need to move the cars and clear up the glass.”

    Driver #3: “How dare you make me late. This is so inconsiderate of your restaurant to allow these people to crash on this road!”

    Me: “Well you need to turn around and go the other way, because these people’s needs are much greater than yours right now. And what was the restaurant supposed to do, make them crash in the car park?”

    Driver #3: “YES! This is completely ridiculous!”

    Best Just To Enable Them

    | Newark, OH, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology, Transportation

    (A customer in her mid-40s comes up to the kiosk.)

    Customer: “Excuse me.”

    Me: “How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I put in my card at the pump, and it tells me ‘Pump Enabled.’”

    Me: “…Yes?”

    Customer: “What does ‘Enabled’ mean?”

    Me: “Well, it means that you can work the pump. The transaction is probably going to time out by time you walk back to the pump, but try again. All it means is that the pump is working.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. Thank you.”

    (The customer walks off and I continue counting cigarettes. After a few minutes, she comes back.)

    Me: “Oh, welcome back!”

    Customer: “It still says ‘Pump Enabled.’”

    Me: “Go ahead and pump your gas, ma’am.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. Thanks.”

    (She walks away, but after a few moments, I see her walking back to the kiosk.)

    Me: “Ma’am, let me help you…”

    This Train Is All Stops To The Edge Of Reason

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Money, Transportation

    (I’m going through the gate to the subway when I hear a woman talking to an attendant.)

    Woman #1: “I only have $2 of the regular $3 fare.”

    Attendant: *very amicably* “Don’t worry about it! Just go through.”

    (Later on the platform, I overhear this loud exchange between the same woman, Woman #1, and her friend, Woman #2.)

    Woman #1: “That’s what’s wrong with this city nowadays!”

    Woman #2: “What are you talking about?”

    Woman #1: “That idiot just let me pay $2 for a subway fare! TTC (our transit system) is always talking about how they don’t have any money, but he let me pay $2!”

    Woman #2: “The transit system is going to h***!”

    (I guess you really can’t make some people happy!)

    Driving In Laps

    | Ohrid, Macedonia | Bizarre, Criminal/Illegal, Theme Of The Month, Transportation

    (I used to work as a police officer back in old Yugoslavia. One summer night, I do a routine stop for a speeder. Surprisingly, it’s an old Fiat 500. I walk up and the window rolls down. I see the driver, a man. On his lap is a woman.)

    Me: “Um, sir. Do you know why I pulled you over?”

    Man: “Yes, I think I was speeding.”

    Me: “You think? Well, it’s also because you have a woman on your lap.”

    Man: “What are you talking about? I don’t have anyone on my lap!”

    Me: “Sir, I am not stupid. There is a woman on your lap!”

    Man: “Officer, I assure you there is no woman on my lap! Have you been drinking tonight?”

    Me: “Okay, then. Sir, please step out of the car.”

    Man: “What? I’ve done nothing wron—”

    Me: “Step out of the car, sir.”

    (The man comes out and so does the woman on his lap. As they exit, I look into the car and see another man in the passenger seat, also with a woman on his lap.)

    Me: “Everyone step out of the car!”

    (The other man and his woman friend step out as well, but unbelievably I see another 6 women come out of the back seat, 3 of whom had been sitting on the other women’s laps. As they all line up in front of me, I still can’t believe my eyes. 10 people—2 men and 8 women—somehow piled into this one tiny little car. I was so astonished that I let them go! I just made sure no one was drunk and that the driver had an open lap. Even then, I still followed them home to make sure they didn’t get into a wreck.)

    A Streetcar Named Cheshire

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Bizarre, Pets & Animals, Theme Of The Month, Transportation

    (I’m taking my cat in a carrier to the vet. I don’t have a car, so I’m taking the streetcar; it’s mostly empty except for an older woman.)

    Older Woman: “You go to vet?”

    Me: “Yeah, it’s time for my girl’s checkup.”

    Older Woman: “May I see?”

    Me: “Sure.”

    Older Woman: *pets my cat* “Oh, such soft fur. What dog?”

    Me: “Oh, she’s not a dog. She’s a cat.”

    Older Woman: “Rare to see such soft dog. Good brushing!”

    Me: “Again, thank you, but she’s a cat.”

    Older Woman: “And well behaved! Dogs bark!”

    Cat: “Meow!”

    Older Woman: “You and dog have good day!”

    Me: *to my cat* “Sorry girl, but you’re a dog today.”

    Page 14/29First...1213141516...Last