October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Tourists/Travel

Bringing You Up To Speed About Your State

| ID, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Tourists/Travel

(I am stopped while driving cross-country, going about 95.)

Highway Patrol: “Do you know how fast you were going, Ma’am?”

Me: “About 95. I thought there was no speed limit in Montana.”

Highway Patrol: “Yes, there is, Ma’am. And you’re in Idaho.”

(I got the ticket.)

Parking Back And Forth

| Seattle, WA, USA | Extra Stupid, Tourists/Travel, Transportation

Caller: “I’m leaving from your downtown terminal next week and I wanted to know if there is parking there.”

Me: “Sure! We have a small lot on our property, where you’re welcome to park if there is a spot available. There’s also a city lot, right out front, where you can park for about 3 days. And lastly, there is a pay parking lot at the office building just north of us.”

Caller: *impatiently* “I just wanted to know if there was parking there.”

Me: “Okay, great.” *thinking his question was already answered by the list of parking options*

Caller: “…so, is there?”

Some People Should Be Barred(code)

| Indianapolis, IN, USA | Extra Stupid, Tourists/Travel

(I am sitting in one of the entry booths. A guest comes up to my booth to check in.)

Me: “Hello! Welcome to the zoo.”

Guest: “Hi! Um… I don’t know which piece of paper I’m supposed to give you.”

Me: “I need the one with the barcode on the front so I can scan it for you.”

Guest: “Oh! Okay. Um…which one is that?”

Me: *points to ticket* “It’s that one right there, on the top.”

Guest: “Oh! Right! Um…which one?”

Me: “The one you’re holding, ma’am.”

Guest: “Of course! Uh, what’s a barcode?”

Me: “Don’t worry about it.” *takes entire stack of paper*

(This happens every day, multiple times a day.)

Weathering Demanding Customers

| Bangor, Wales, UK | Crazy Requests, Tourists/Travel

(I work in a large supermarket in a tourist-y area. The last few years there has been almost persistent snow cover on the mountains from November through February. This December, however, has been really mild with temperatures consistently in the high single figures or low double figures. I am approached as I am stacking some shelves.)

Customer: “WHERE’S THE SNOW?!”

Me: “Erm… excuse me, sorry? Snow? I don’t follow.”

Customer: “You know! SNOW! I was promised there’d be snow!”

Me: *thinking he must mean a product* “Can you describe it? I can show you our seasonal aisle if you want to browse for tree decorations and ornaments.”

Customer: “No! I want ACTUAL snow. Like, falling from the sky. They said it would be the coldest winter on record. I booked a holiday here especially!”

Me: “Erm… sorry that the weather’s mild. I don’t know what you want me to do about it, though?”

Customer: “Tell me why there’s no snow!”

Me: “Well, the wind is coming from the south-west, instead of the north. I guess it’s warmer where it came from than where it’s going and keeping our temperatures mild.”

Customer: *walks off* “THERE’S NO SNOW!”

(I was left there standing and wondering what had just happened.)

It’s All Pat-Down From Here

| Seattle, WA, USA | Tourists/Travel

(In our security protocols, if a person alarms our metal detector and cannot remove whatever is alarming, like a too-small bracelet or medical device, we must pat them down in order to clear the alarm. I’m female and walk up to assist a woman who has alarmed because of a knee replacement. We are required to explain all of the pat down and ask legal questions before every pat down. I’ve just finished the legal advisement.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, and finally have you ever had a pat down before?”

Woman: “Yes, but it’s never been this intrusive before!”

Me: “…ma’am, I haven’t even started yet.”

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