Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • De-Engineering Stereotypes
    (1,759 thumbs up)
  • September Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Tourists/Travel

    They’ll Never Survive Welsh

    | Manchester, UK | Funny Names, Language & Words, Tourists/Travel

    (A tourist is in line to get a ticket.)

    Tourist: “Can I have a ticket to Loogahgbaroogah?”

    Me: “Sorry, where?”

    Tourist: “Loogahbaroogah.”

    Me: Sir, there is no rail station in the UK called Loogahbaroogah.”

    Tourist: “But…”

    Me: “Did you mean Loughbrough?” (It’s pronounced ‘Luffbruh’)

    (The tourist gets his ticket and walks off, followed by the next customer in line.)

    Next Customer: “It’s a good job he didn’t want my ticket. Return to Llanelli, please.”

    Reality Bites, And So Do Customers

    | Delaware, OH, USA | Top, Tourists/Travel

    (I work at a historical site of the civil war, dressing and acting as if we were still in that time period)

    Tourist: “Is that fire real?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Tourist: “Is the water you’re drinking real?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Tourist: “Are your clothes real?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Tourist: “Are you real?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Tourist: “This place isn’t very interesting.”

    (Please Go) Back To The Future

    | Oxford, UK | Tourists/Travel

    (I work in a small store in Oxford when a busload of tourists comes in to buy large quantities of sweets.)

    Tourist: “We’re stocking up. We’re going to Stratford-on-Avon to see Shakespeare’s house.”

    Me: “Okay, but why don’t you just buy it when you get there?”

    (Several tourists stop what they are doing.)

    Tourist: “They sell candy in the 16th century?”

    The Fourth Is Not Strong With This One

    | Traverse City, MI, USA | Top, Tourists/Travel

    Me: “Thank you for calling the [hotel]. How may I direct your call?”

    Customer: *in a British accent* “I need a room for tonight.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we are booked.”

    Customer: “Why?”

    Me: “It’s the 4th of July. We’re always booked on the 4th.”

    Customer: “I know the date! Why are you booked?”

    Me: “Um, it’s July 4th.”

    Customer: “Listen, just give me a room!”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir, we are sold out. The entire town is sold out.”

    Customer: “The entire town? Why?”

    Me: “Sir, it’s the 4th of July. Independence day.”

    Customer: “Independence from what?”

    Me: “Um, England.”

    Customer: “Oh bloody h***!” *click*

    Military Intelligence, Part 3

    | Portsmouth, UK | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Military, Tourists/Travel

    (I work in an English branch of a US coffee chain. Because we’re a naval town, US navy ships always stop here and the sailors come in for ‘a taste of home’…)

    Me: “Hello, what would you like?”

    Sailor 1: “One of your chocolate frappuccinos.”

    Me: “OK. What size do you want?”

    Sailor 1: “Erm… can I ask you a question?”

    Me: “Yeah, go on then.”

    Sailor: “Are your frappuccinos made with ice, like they are back in the states?”

    Sailor 2: “Yeah, good point man!”

    Me: “Yes, yes they are made with ice.”

    Sailor 2: “Is that British ice or do you get it, like, flown over from the States so it tastes the same?”

    Me: “…”

    Sailor 1: “Dude! Yeah! Is it going to taste the same as it does at home?!”

    Me: “Why don’t you try it and let me know?”

    Sailors 1 & 2: “Yeahhh…”

    (Their ship was over for about a week and true to their word, they came back to inform me that their drinks did in fact taste the same as they did back home.)

    Related:
    Military Intelligence, Part 2
    Military Intelligence

    Page 42/42First...3839404142