Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Using The Lord’s Name Doesn’t Deliver
    (1,682 thumbs up)
  • July Theme Of The Month: Animal Madness!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Tourists/Travel

    No Country For Confused Men

    | Edinburgh, UK | Tourists/Travel

    Customer: “Hi! My friends are coming in from America. Is there any chance I can meet them at their baggage claim?”

    Me: “I’m sorry. Unfortunately, you aren’t allowed to go through the gates at international arrivals. You’ll just have to meet them there.”

    Customer: “Oh, that sucks. Never mind.”

    (The customer begins to leave and suddenly turns back.)

    Customer: “Oh, wait! I’ve got another question.”

    Me: “Sure.”

    Customer: “What country am I in?”

    Lost-And-Found-Again-Land

    | Halifax, Canada | Tourists/Travel

    (My customer asks me for a map and says he is going to be heading over to Newfoundland. I give him a map and point it out for him.)

    Customer: “Why do you spell it ‘Newfoundland’? It’s New Finland.”

    Me: “Well, its pronounced sort of like New Finland, but it’s actually Newfoundland, as in ‘this is a New Found Land.’”

    Customer: “No, it’s New Finland.”

    Me: “I can guarantee you there are not many Finnish people there.”

    Customer: “Of course not. They left 1,000 years ago!”

    When In Rome (Or Canada)…

    | British Columbia, Canada | Canada, Tourists/Travel

    (I work at a tourist shop where we get Americans on a regular basis.)

    Me: “Would you like to pay by credit card?”

    Customer: “Yes. Do you know where I can find a Bank of America?”

    Me: “Um, I’m sorry, but there isn’t any around here.”

    Customer: “So you guys don’t have Bank of America.”

    Me: “No.”

    Customer: “Are you sure?”

    Me: “Yes, this is Canada.”

    Related:
    When In Rome (Or An Indian Restaurant)…
    When In Rome (Or A Kosher Deli)…

    The ETA Is Up In The Air

    | USA | Tourists/Travel

    Me: “Thank you for calling [airline]. How may I help you?”

    Caller: “What time will flight [number] to [city] arrive?”

    (I look up the flight in the system, which shows that it’s expected to arrive right about now.)

    Me: “That flight is expected to arrive at [time].”

    Caller: “Well, I’m calling from the plane, and we’re not landing yet.”

    Me: “If you’re on the plane, you probably have more up-to-date information than I do. One of the flight attendants should be able to tell you when you’ll arrive.”

    Caller: “I have to go. The flight attendants are yelling at me for talking on my cell phone!”

    (The call abruptly ends.)

    I Left My Job In San Fresno

    | Fresno, CA, USA | Tourists/Travel

    Me: “Thank you for calling [hotel]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Hi, I have a reservation under [name]. I’m at the airport and need a shuttle to pick me up.”

    Me: “Sure thing, sir. I’ll send it right out! Just wait by the taxi island outside of baggage claim.”

    (About 15 minutes later, the driver calls me saying he can’t see anyone. At the same time the customer calls back.)

    Customer: “Hi, I was wondering if the shuttle was on its way.”

    Me: “The driver is out there now, sir, and has circled around but says he can’t see anyone. Are you by baggage claim at the taxi island?”

    Customer: “Yeah, I’m by the cabs on the second level.”

    Me: “Wait, second level? Sir, what airport are you at now?”

    Customer: “At San Francisco airport, of course.”

    Me: “Sir, I’m not sure how to tell you this, but you’re in San Francisco.”

    Customer: “Yeah, I just said that!”

    Me: “This hotel is in Fresno.”

    Customer: “Yeah, Fresno is like a suburb, right?”

    Me: “We’re about two hours away in central California.”

    Customer: “Oh my God, it’s midnight and I have an interview at 7am in Fresno. I’m screwed!”

    (I directed the customer to information. Thankfully, he was able to find one last rental car place open, and made it just in time to change for his interview.)


    Page 32/42First...3031323334...Last