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    Building Up Abuse About The Building

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Top

    (I work as maintenance coordinator for a property management company. I get a call from a nearly 30-year-old tenant’s mother.)

    Me: “Hello, This is [My Name]. How can I help—”

    Mother: “You listen here. I am going to sue the living s*** out of you and you negligent company unless you fix the issues in my son’s apartment!”

    Me: “I’ll do everything I can. What is the—”

    Mother: “Well, YOU have already been doing ALL that YOU can. Maybe I need to talk to someone else, cause all you can do is f*** all!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m more than happy to assist you in any way I can but I will stop this conversation if you continue to be abusive. What is the add—”

    Mother: “I’M BEING ABUSIVE?! You take my money EVERY MONTH so my son can live in that s***-hole! Breathing in mold, dealing with rats and roaches! WHAT ABOUT THE GOD-D*** HOLE IN THE CEILING?! Don’t you think that’s abusive!?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I have no knowledge of any unit having any of these problems but for me to help I need the address—”

    Mother: “YOU HAVE NO F****** KNOWLEDGE?! LET ME TALK TO YOUR MANAGER!”

    (At this point I lose my patience.)

    Me: “Ma’am, did you sign the lease for your son or were you present for the signing of the lease?”

    Mother: “No, I did not, but what the h*** does that have to do with anything?”

    Me: “It MEANS I legally do not have to talk you. NO ONE here has to, and if you continue to be this abrasive on the phone, I will advise the property manager to evict your adult son from his unit. I DON’T WANT TO DO THAT! Now, PLEASE, if you want me to help I need the ADDRESS!”

    Mother: “Fine, it’s [address].”

    Me: “Ma’am, we don’t even manage that building. It’s managed by [Other Management Company].”

    Mother: “Well, then, how do I get ahold of them?”

    Me: “Let me Google that for you. ” *hangs up phone*

    Please Keep Both Hands On The Wheel(chair)

    | Dallas, TX, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Health & Body, Top, Transportation

    (I’ve been in a wheelchair for several years and am still pretty independent. Unfortunately there are times the chair can be a real pain. I broke down on the interstate on my daily commute and do not have a cell phone. As a result I am wheeling myself down the I-35 shoulder headed to the closest gas station when a DPS unit pulls up behind me. I was very tired since the shoulder of an interstate is not the easiest surface for me to go long distances. When I see the cop something just reminds me of a routine traffic stop, which I find hilarious.)

    Me: “Don’t bother asking for my license or proof of insurance for my chair, as I have neither.”

    (The cop looked confused for a second, and then burst out laughing.)

    Driving Thru Justice

    , | Springfield, MO, USA | Awesome Workers, Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Top

    (I work at a fairly popular fast-food restaurant. Our location is right next to three different college campuses, so our main customers are a lot of students and teachers in-between classes. This, of course, means our fast service is super-essential, especially in the middle of a rush-hour lunch period.)

    Me: “Thank you for choosing [Fast Food]! How does a [Burger] sound today?”

    Customer: “What sounds good is a moment to order. Just wait a second.”

    Me: “Okie-dokie, just holla as soon as you’re ready to—”

    Customer: “Will you shut the f*** up and let me f****** decide?!”

    Me:  *shocked* “Um, okay. I—”

    Customer: “Um, um, um! BE QUIET. I AM TRYING TO ORDER!”

    (I stay quiet for four minutes, until she speaks again.)

    Customer: “Are you even f****** there?”

    Me: “Yeppers, and I’m ready to take your order whenever you are.”

    Customer: “Don’t you f****** take that tone with me! I’ll have a large number six with a [Soda], no ice.”

    Me: “Excellent, I’ve got a—”

    Customer: “What’s my total?”

    Me: “I’ll ring it up.”

    (The customer drives up before I am done punching it in, and parks at the first window. There is no one there, since that employee is on her break, and all of the service is left to me. Eventually, the customer seems to get the message, and I wave her up to the final window.)

    Customer: “Why isn’t there anyone f****** there to take my money?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. He’s on break. It’s just me right now.” *I hand her her drink* “Your total came to $6.55.”

    Customer: “WHAT? That’s too much. I don’t have that!” *waves her credit card*

    Me: “I’m sorry. I was trying to tell you the total at the speaker—”

    Customer: “This [Soda] tastes like s***. I want a free one.”

    Me: “I’ll just pour you another one—”

    Customer: “I want to talk to your manager.”

    (I get my manager, who had heard the better part of our exchange over the headsets.)

    Manager: “How can I help you, ma’am?”

    Customer: “I swear I never do this, but I have been waiting forever to get my food, your worker is a f****** b**** and totally incompetent, and this isn’t the drink I ordered. And if I don’t get a free [Competitor’s Burger] and some pies or something, then I swear I’m never coming back and I will tell my kids and all of my grandkids and everyone I know to never come back to this restaurant ever again!”

    Manager: “That’s really too bad. If you want a free [Competitor’s Burger], you’ll have to get your a** down three blocks and b**** at the [Competitor]‘s people instead. And you’ll have to, now that I’m officially banning you. Get the f*** out of my drive-thru.”

    (At this, my manager slammed the window shut and told me to go ahead and eat the meal that the rude customer had left behind.)

    Being A Good Person Is Doctor’s Orders

    | Australia | Geeks Rule, Movies & TV, Top

    (One of our national TV broadcasters has a chain of stores that sell DVDs and other merchandise for the shows on their channel. I am waiting in the store in line behind an older customer.)

    Customer: “… but I don’t understand why your shop is full of this Doctor Who rubbish! It’s a waste of space! You should be selling products for good, wholesome educational shows, not this science-fiction crap! It doesn’t teach kids anything! I bet that stuff doesn’t even sell!”

    Manager: “With all due respect, ma’am, Doctor Who is one of our network’s highest-rating and most popular dramas, and while it is primarily aimed at an older audience it meets the Australian Board of Classification’s definition of a family show. Furthermore, you don’t have to watch it or purchase the merchandise if you don’t agree with it.”

    Customer: “It’s not the most popular show! Nobody even watches it! I bet the girl behind me has never even heard of it!”

    (She turns to look at me and realises I’m wearing a TARDIS T-shirt holding several pieces of ‘Doctor Who’ merchandise. Behind me in line is a mother with her five- and eight-year-old sons, buying a ‘Doctor Who’ backpack for the older one. The customer realises her argument isn’t going to work and decides to start attacking the mother.)

    Customer: “You shouldn’t let him watch that science-fiction crap! It doesn’t teach them anything!”

    (Normally I would keep my mouth shut in this situation and let the manager handle it, but I was getting so fed up that I decided to speak up.)

    Me: “Excuse me, but Doctor Who is an extremely deep and educational show with a large cult following, that teaches lessons that go far beyond the schoolyard.” *I begin to recite a speech given by a character on the show* “The Doctor taught me that you don’t just give up. You don’t just let things happen. You make a stand. You say no. You have the guts to do what’s right when everyone else just runs away.”

    (Taken aback, the customer shut her mouth, quickly pays for her things, and leaves.)

    Five-Year-Old Behind Me: “Mummy, I change my mind! I want to be like her when I grow up!”

    A Sign That It Will Be OK

    | ME, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Top

    (I’ve just gotten off a really long, rough shift and decide to treat myself with some ice cream from a shop that’s just opened for the season. I order a small cone and hold out my debit card for the cashier to take while checking my phone.)

    Cashier: “Oh. Um… I’m sorry, but we don’t accept cards.”

    Me: *looking up* “Oh, really?”

    (As I look up, I see just above the cashier’s head a 2x3ft neon pink sign with large, bold letters that say, “No cards accepted. Sorry for any inconvenience”. I glance around and see no less than three more large, bright signs all saying some variation of the pink one.)

    Me: *laughing* “Oh, my god, I am so sorry. I’ve always sworn to myself I wouldn’t be one of THOSE customers, you know? Ah, golly, here, lemme run to my car and get some cash. I’m so sorry.”

    (After I pay, the girl hands me a medium cone. I’m about to go back to the counter and tell her she gave me a larger size than I wanted when I see some writing on the napkin wrapped around the cone.)

    Note On Napkin: “Thank you for not being one of THOSE customers! Here’s to summer. Hope to see you again!”

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