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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Poorly Perceived

    | NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Money, Top

    (I work at a restaurant in a very rich town, in which I also live. I am getting my hair done at a ‘posh’ salon when I see one of my regulars from the restaurant sitting in the first chair.)

    Me: “Hello Mrs. [Name]. Good to see you.”

    Customer: “Oh hel— aren’t you my waitress from the place down the road?”

    Me: “Yes, I am. How are you doing today?”

    Customer: “I didn’t know people like you were allowed in a place like this.”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    (At this point my stylist comes over to bring me to her station.)

    Customer: *to stylist* “Honey, did you know this girl is a waitress? Are you sure she has enough money to pay? You may want to check before you start serving her.”

    Stylist: “Ma’am, [My Name] has been a client here for two years. She’s very reliable.”

    Customer: “Oh my. What a waste of money. Poor girls like you should not be wasting their money on things like this. Don’t you have a child to care for or something of the like?”

    (At this point everyone in the salon is quite uncomfortable and is staring at the three of us.)

    Me: “I’m so sorry Mrs. [Name]. I actually only work at the restaurant because I don’t like to spend my time being unproductive. You see, I am a college student at [very prestigious college]. I am currently studying to be a biomedical engineer, which I’ll have you know is the second top grossing career currently. And since it seems to matter to you so much, I’m quite financially comfortable! And even if I were a poor waitress, as you so kindly suggested, people are free to do whatever they like with the money they work so hard for! Your husband comes in twice a week to get coffee and sit at our counter and complain about you! So really, Mrs. [Name], I’m very, very sorry for you.”

    He Has The Floor Model But His Wife Has The Floor

    | Allentown, PA, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Top

    (My fair-trade, non-profit store is rather on the small side. We have no stockroom, meaning that all of our available merchandise is on the sales floor. One night I am working alone when new customers come in. The wife is very pleasant, but the husband decides that he’s going to do everything in his power to mess with me. After about twenty minutes of his questioning my store’s mission, whether we really qualify as a non-profit, and why he should care about the people who make the products we sell, he and his wife decide on a silk lamp. We have only one available.)

    Customer: “How much is the lamp?”

    Me: “That is [price].”

    Customer: “I mean after my discount. You’re going to give me a discount because I’m buying the floor model.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t have a back room. Everything we sell is the ‘floor model.’ It’s going to be [price].”

    Customer: “Oh, come on! You gotta give me some kind of discount!”

    Customer’s Wife: “Honey, stop talking before I tell her to add on a bonus charge for having to put up with you.”

    Snakes Like To Vegetate After A Meal

    | Gladstone, MO, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals, Top

    (I have several exotic pets. I buy feeder mice and fish for my snakes and turtles once per week. Two other customers come in with their little poodles.)

    Customer #1: “We need to get new collars and leashes for our girls. These are getting dirty.”

    Customer #2: “They must have rhinestones on them, and be pink or purple.”

    Employee #1: *points* “They are right there, ladies. Let me know if you need help reaching the ones on the top.”

    Customer #1: “I’m not going over there! You have nasty lizards over there! No, you just bring all the little pink ones over here and we’ll look at them.”

    Employee #2: “You want her to carry over probably 40 leashes and collars when you could just go look at them yourself?”

    Customer #2: “Are you deaf!? We aren’t going anywhere near there with our babies Those nasty lizards might eat them.”

    (The ‘lizard’ they are talking about is in fact a 14 ft Burmese python, which is about 20 ft away from that wall in a large glass tank.)

    Employee #1: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I need to stay at the register and the other employee is putting up our new order of fish. You’ll have to pick out the one you want.”

    (In a huff, Customer #1 leaves her dog with her friend and goes over and pulls off 10-15 leashes, knocking probably 30 more onto the floor. She throws them all on the counter before rifling through them. They then spend the next 30 minutes trying every single one on BOTH dogs before deciding on the ones they like. They leave the extras lying on the counter. Then they get in line behind another woman with a small plastic animal box with mice in it.)

    Customer #2: “Ew, who would want a mouse for a pet! That’s so nasty!”

    Employee: “While we do sell mice for pets, these are feeder mice, miss.”

    Customer #1: “What the h*** does that mean? Feeder? What is she feeding them?”

    Customer #3: “No, I’m not feeding them anything. I’m feeding them to my snake when I get home.”

    Customer #2: “You’re so cruel! How can you do that! Why would you keep a nasty snake for a pet and then feed it mice!? Why don’t you let the thing go, or feed it pellets or something? They have all kinds of pellets over there!”

    Employee #2: “Snakes don’t usually eat pellet food. Some eat sausage made from ground up meat, but those pellets are mostly plant matter.”

    Customer #1: “So feed them that. Why can’t they eat vegetables?”

    Customer #2: “Yeah. They should be vegetarians like our puppies here. They only eat [Brand] kibble.”

    Me: “Er… you know [Brand] dog food has meat in it, right? I mean, it’s probably got more meat in it than a lot of other dog foods.”

    Customer #1: “NO. It does NOT have meat in it! We only buy the kind that has venison in it!”

    Employee #2: “Venison is meat, ma’am. It’s made from deer.”

    Customer #2: “You’re so stupid. It’s not deer; it’s venison. All vegetable dog food!”

    Employee #1: “Okay. Well, I’ll just ring up those collars for you.”

    Customer #2: “So you need to get a vegetarian diet for those snakes or just let them go. Killing mice for them is just wrong.”

    Me: “Snakes are not herbivores. They eat meat. They have to. Meat, bugs, eggs, you know, protein. You can’t just throw a carrot in there and expect them to eat it.”

    Customer #1: “I never said they were dinosaurs! I know that they’ve only been around like 300 years or something. Like, when President Lincoln was around they discovered them. But it doesn’t matter. They shouldn’t eat meat. You need to fix that. And this store should not allow people to buy them for food. I’m going to start a petition!”

    Me: “Who in the h*** are you going to petition to make snakes vegetarians? God?!”

    (Customer #2 gasps and clings her dog to her, covering HER DOG’S ears.)

    Customer #2: “Oh, you are going straight to Hell for talking like that. I can’t even be in here.”

    (Customer #2 gestures to her poodle.)

    Customer #2: “Come on, Porsche!”

    Customer #1: “We’re going straight to the health department for this and making sure everyone knows you’re satanic devil worshipers!”

    (They both storm out, leaving the leashes.)

    Me: “Well, that was a wonderful way to start out a Monday. Let me know if the health department shuts you down for being satanic devil worshipers who feed mice to vegetarian snakes.”

    Employee #2: “Yep! I’ll give you a call about it!”

    They Stole Her Precious

    | Australia | Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids, Top

    (Having been married just one month, I am very precious and careful with my wedding ring. I take it off only to wash my hands. I’m in a shopping mall bathroom and have just taken my ring off and set it on top of my bag next to me. At the sink next to me is a girl about the age of 12.)

    Girl: “Hey mum! Look what I found!”

    Mum: *in a loud whisper* “Put that in your pocket! Show me later!”

    (They begin to leave. I reach for my ring and find it gone! I see the girl just shoving my ring into her pocket with a big smile on her face.)

    Me: “Hey! Excuse me! I think you have something of mine!”

    Mum: “Mind your own business!” *to her daughter* “Keep walking, honey.”

    (They both flee the bathroom, but I follow and yell.)

    Me: “Stop! Hey! Give it back!”

    Girl: “No! It’s mine, b****!”

    Mum: “You leave my baby alone!”

    (I start to cry. With the mum yelling at me, the chaos brings a security guard running over.)

    Mum: “Thank God! This b**** is trying to steal my baby girl’s ring!”

    Me: “No, no, it’s my wedding ring. I took it off for a moment and she took it!”

    Girl: “She’s lying! It’s mine!”

    Guard: “Enough!” *to me* Do you have any proof it’s yours?”

    (I’m still crying and try to describe it, but the girl and her mum keep screaming over me. The guard has to yell at them to get them to quiet down. At last, he looks at my long thin fingers, and the girl’s very short chubby ones, and he winks at me.)

    Guard: “Okay, tell you what. Whoever the ring fits, that’s who it belongs to.”

    (The guard forces the girl to hand it over, with the mum screaming the whole time. Of course, the ring doesn’t get anywhere near fitting her, and is a perfect fit on me. The guard calls the police and they both get banned from the store. My husband and I are still very good friends with the guard; in fact, he’s marrying my husband’s sister next year!)

    In Line And Out Of Line, Part 2

    | USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Health & Body, Top

    (I’m standing in line at a Black Friday sale, waiting to check out my purchases. We’ve been standing about 45 minutes as the lines are very, VERY long. There is a man all by himself, with no cart and no purchases, standing two customers in front of me. All of a sudden his wife pulls two carts over, with their daughter pushing another one. All three carts are filled completely. They push through the line and get in with him. One of the customers in the line speaks up.)

    Customer #1: “Hey! You can’t just cut in line like that. We’ve been waiting an hour. Get to the back!”

    Cutting Customer: “F*** you! It’s not my fault you don’t know how to shop. Mind your own f****** business!”

    Me: “Excuse me. Would you mind watching your language? I don’t want my son to hear that.”

    Cutting Customer: “You can kiss my a**, b****! That little p**** is going to learn it one way or the other. He’s an ugly little SOB with that hair cut, anyway!”

    My Son: “I’m growing my hair to donate to kids with cancer, like my best friend!”

    (The cutting customer’s daughter decides to speak up.)

    Cutting Customer’s Daughter: “Your little f** friend should just die. Why do they give them treatments for that s*** anyway? I hope he dies, you little a**-wipe.”

    (My four-year-old son starts crying, asking me if his friend is going to die. I try to calm him down. Meanwhile, my friend gets the manager of the store.)

    Manager: “Ma’am, this woman just told me what you said to her son and that you cut in line. I’m going to ask you once to please move to the back of the line; otherwise, you’ll need to leave the store.”

    Cutting Customer: “Now, you look here! You can’t make us move. We’re buying more than $1000 worth of stuff here! And that b**** and her snot nosed kid got what they deserved.”

    (The manager gets on his walkie-talkie and has security escort them out. Upon the managers and several customers suggestions, we file verbal harassment charges on the customers who cut in. The manager made a donation for $500 to the charity that my son’s friend had out in my son’s name. We cut his hair three months later, donating 18 inches, which they made into a wig. His friend made a full recovery, by the way. They both donate their hair about every five years.)

    Related:
    In Line And Out Of Line


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