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    Category: Time

    These Minutes Are Minutiae

    | Ontario, Canada | Time

    (I work in the pro shop at a golf course, and people often call to make tee times. Note that our tee times are spaced 8 minutes apart.)

    Me: “Hello, this is [golf course]. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like to make a tee time for 2:30, please.”

    Me: “Alright, I’ve got 2:32. Can I have your last name, please?”

    Customer: “2:32?! That’s WAY too late! Do you have anything earlier?”

    Me: “Sure, I have 2:24.”

    Customer: “2:24?! That’s MUCH too early. You guys need to have better times!”

    Leap Days Of Logic

    | Ontario, Canada | Time

    (The call center is in Canada, but we have many customers from the USA. This call comes in toward the end of the day on July 4th.)

    Caller: “So, did you have a good Fourth of July?”

    Me: “Well, I’m in Canada, so it’s just a regular day here, but it was not bad. We do have Canada Day, which is July 1st.”

    Caller: *confused* “So… then… is today July 3rd for you, or July 5th?”

    A Day Late And A Month Short

    , | Connellsville, PA, USA | Time

    (Note: our company sent out coupons a few months ago, and they expired June 3rd. A customer walks in and slaps the coupons down on the counter.)

    Customer: “I want to use this for my salad.”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, those expired at the 3rd of the month.”

    Customer: “NO! It says they expire June 32nd!”

    Me: “Sir, there is no June 32nd.”

    Customer: *glances at the coupon and then storms out of the building cursing*

    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 9

    | Kingston, Ontario, Canada | Extra Stupid, Time

    (I am working on box office one night. It’s soon after the release of the newest Twilight. Two teenage girls are at my cash purchasing tickets to see the movie.)

    Teenage Girl #1: “So, you have Twilight at 6:30 and 6:50?”

    Me: “Yes, we do.”

    Teenage Girl #1: “That doesn’t make sense! It isn’t 20 minutes long!”

    Me: “It’s in two different theaters.”

    Teenage Girl #2: “Oh right! Duh!”

    Related:
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 8
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 7
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 6
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 5
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 4
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 3
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 2
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy

    Take Your Time, And Ours Too

    | Ohio, USA | Food & Drink, Technology, Time

    (Note: I have been trying to help a caller get logged into our website for 20 minutes, but she keeps mistyping her username.)

    Me: “Alright, let’s try this again. Remember that your username is ******. So, try it again and I’ll wait for you to type.”

    Caller: “Okay, I’ll try it again. Just give me a minute to type.”

    (For a few minutes, there is silence. Then, I hear her get up, walk away from the phone, and begin to punch what sounds like microwave buttons. Soon afterwards, I hear popcorn popping.)

    Me: *confused* “Are you still trying to enter your username?”

    Caller: “Oh! Are we still trying to get me logged in? I thought we were just chatting now, and I thought I would make myself a snack!”

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