Category: Time

Unfortunate Opening Words

, | Tempe, AZ, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Time

(I am prepping the store for open, and can see [Regular] standing right outside the front door, waiting for nearly 15 minutes.)

Me: *unlocking the door and exactly six am, our open time* “Good morning, [Regular]! I’ve got some coffee already brewed for you.”

Regular: “Boy, you guys sure wait until the laaaast minute to open those doors.”

Me: “Well, we open at six, which it just turned right now.”

Regular: “Yeah, I know. Still. You’ve been here a while already….”

Lacks A Homely Reception

| CT, USA | Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Time

(I live under a dentist’s office and in the same complex as several other doctor’s offices and medical buildings. I am sleeping, only to be woken up to the sounds of someone try to open, then pounding on my door. Standing there is an elderly man, who tells me he is looking for [Doctor]’s office.)

Me: *as politely as someone who’s been woken up from a deep sleep can be* “I’m sorry, sir, this is actually an apartment. Maybe your doctor is in the front of the building?”

(Instead of just leaving he becomes irate.)

Elderly Man: “You just want to go home early, don’t you? That’s why you won’t see me!”

(He tries to force his way into my apartment, getting the door wide enough to look inside.)

Elderly Man: “You need take more pride in your waiting area and make it look more professional, this looks like some crappy apartment!”

(After going back and forth with him I finally slam the door on him and tell him firmly:)

Me: “I am  not a receptionist! You’re trying to force your way into my home and if you do not leave now I’ll be calling the cops.”

Elderly Man: *yelling* “I’ll make sure you’re fired for this! [Doctor] would never let such lazy trash run his office!”

(And with a kick to my door he disappeared to bother someone else.)

You Are Why We Need Days Off

| TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Time

Me: “May I help you, ma’am?”

Customer: “I’d like this dress shirt in a size small.”

Me: “It appears that the store only carries these shirts down to a medium. But you may feel free to order a small online.”

Customer: “I don’t understand; why it isn’t available in the store?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but our store doesn’t carry it in that size. But you may order it online. It’s practically the same as buying it here.”

Customer: “I don’t understand why I can’t just buy it here. Don’t you work in this department?”

Me: “Actually, no. The staff-member that specializes in men’s had a morning shift, so she’s not here now.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t understand why she can’t help me.”

Me: “Um, because she had the morning shift. And since it’s the afternoon, she’s no longer here.”

Customer: “I just don’t understand why someone can’t be here to help me.”

Me: “Do you expect everyone to be here 24/7?”

Customer: “I just can’t understand why she’s not here.”

Me: “Ma’am, do you have a job?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Why aren’t you there right now?”

(Pause.)

Customer: “I can’t talk to you right now.”

Having A Whine About The Wine

| Glasgow, Scotland, UK | Food & Drink, Time

(I work at the fish counter in a well-known supermarket chain. This exchange takes place just before nine am on a Saturday, one hour after opening. A well-dressed woman walks up.)

Me: *smiling* “Hi, there, what can I get you?”

Customer: “I’d like four of the salmon fillets in two oven bags with lemon butter.”

Me: “No problem.” *printing the barcode labels to stick to the bags* “I don’t mean to be rude or anything, but how much longer will you be in the store for?”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: “It’s just that I notice you have milk, meats, and various chilled items, as well as your fish.”

Customer: *looking suspicious* “Does that matter?”

Me: “You also have several bottles of wine in your trolley.”

Customer: “I don’t see the problem here.”

Me: “Alcohol can only be sold during licensing hours, which here is 10 ’til 10. You’d have to be in-store for at least another hour before you can buy any.”

(By this point I have bagged the salmon, heat-sealed it and am now sticking on the labels.)

Customer: “But I need this wine today! I’m having friends round for dinner; that’s why I need the salmon!”

Me: “It’s no problem. You could leave the wines here at the counter. The aisle’s just there and we’re not busy yet, so I can put them back, or I can hold them here at the counter for you until you come to get them after 10.”

Customer: “I don’t have time for that! I’m having friends round and I need to cook!”

Me: “Well, nobody can sell alcohol before 10, so that’s really your only option, unless come back later and redo your whole shop, but that’s just inconvenient for everyone.”

(I hand her the bags of salmon, which she throws in the trolley.)

Customer: “Never mind, then.”

(She then flounced off, leaving the trolley parked in front of the counter, full of shopping. I called after her; she ignored me and left the store. I had to call colleagues from various other departments to take the trolley back, root through it, and take the items from their departments back to the shelves and fridges/freezers. I just cut open the salmon bags and put the fillets back on display.  The kicker, though? I came back from my hour lunch break a little after one, and she was having a go at the colleague covering me for “not keeping all her shopping aside for her, ‘like that stupid little kid promised.’” I took a great deal of pleasure informing her she’d have to redo the lot.)

Not Very Closed Minded, Part 9

| AL, USA | Bad Behavior, Time

(I’m a cashier working the closing shift one night, and as with many places we are not allowed to close out our drawers until all the customers in the store have been checked out and left. However we always lock the doors five minutes before closing to deter anyone else from entering. It is time for me to lock the doors and there is still one customer left in the store, so I go to lock the doors so that no one else can come in. As I am locking up a woman runs up to the doors.)

Customer: “Oh, no; are you guys closing?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, we are. I am sorry but you will have to come back tomorrow or you can head over to our 24-hour facility.”

Customer: “Oh, please, I really only need some laundry detergent.”

(I think for a second and knowing that there is still another customer inside I won’t be able to close up anyway so I decide to be charitable.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am since you really only need one item I can let you run and grab it real quick.”

Customer: “Oh, thank you so much.”

(I let her in and promptly close and lock the doors. I turn off the automatic doors and close and lock them. I turn around just in time to see the woman grab a shopping cart and head to the back of the store. I don’t think anything of it at first; I’ve seen people get a shopping carts for a pack of pencils. A few seconds later my manager comes running up to the front.)

Manager: “When did that other woman get here?”

Me: “She came up as I was just about to lock the doors. She said she just had to grab some laundry detergent and then she would be done.”

Manager: “Yeah, well, she’s back there right now just browsing through the shelves. She’s not even near the laundry detergent yet.”

Me: “Please tell me you are joking! This is seriously what I get for trying to be nice?!”

Manager: “Yeah, well, I’m about to follow her around until she gets the hint.”

(My manager turns around and heads in the direction the woman went. The other person that was already inside comes and checks out and leaves. I start cleaning everything up, and before I know it 15 minutes have gone by. All the sudden all the store lights except for the front area lights go out. My manager comes back up front.)

Manager: “I have literally been following this woman around pretty much just standing right next to her and she’s just going as slow as ever. So I turned the lights out. She should be up here soon to check out.”

(Another 20 minutes go by before the woman comes up to the register, her cart is completely full of various items, yet she has no laundry detergent.)

Customer: “I noticed your lights went out at the back of the store. Are you guys closing?”

Me: “…Umm, yes, ma’am. We are…”

Customer: “I wish I would have known. I figured you were when the lights went off so I hurried to finish my shopping. I still didn’t quite finish so I will just have to come back tomorrow for the rest.”

(I pretty much just don’t say anything else except for her total and then walk her out of the store and lock up. It is now an hour after we are supposed to close. The topping on the cake, the woman came back the very next night, once again as I was locking up.)

Customer: “Oh, are you guys closing?”

Me: “Yes, we are. You’ll have to come back tomorrow.”

Customer: “Please, all I need is some toilet paper. I won’t be but a few seconds.”

(I actually start to laugh and just close the doors on her and lock them right in front of her. She starts yelling at me but I just turned around and went inside to close out my drawer. My manager is at the front with me.)

Manager: “What the heck is that yelling?”

Me: “Same woman from last night wanted back in just for some toilet paper. Swore she would only be a second. I started laughing and locked her out.”

Manager: “I’m glad it was you and not me; I probably would have been less polite!”

Related:
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 8
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 7
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 6

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