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    Category: Themed Giveaway

    This Return Has More Than Meets The Eye-Glass

    | Canada | Crazy Requests, Themed Giveaway

    (I’m working at my store when a customer walks into the store with several computer printouts.)

    Me: “Hi! How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I wasn’t able to find any glasses here, so I looked online and found these. They’re perfect and I want you to order them for me.”

    (I look in the stores computer system and they are discontinued, meaning that no more are being made. Some stores in our area may still have one, though, so I call the five or six stores in the area looking for them. No store has them. This chain has hundreds of locations in multiple countries, but we’re only supposed to call the ones with the numbers provided.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t get these for you. They’re discontinued and no store still carries them.”

    Customer: “That’s ridiculous! You mean to say you called all stores here and in the United States and no place has them? I want THESE! That’s bad service!”

    (I’m sales-floor staff. Neither I, nor anyone else, has the time to call over 800 stores for just one sale. To make it worse, this company has very high sales requirements, and every minute I’m calling around I lose out on sales.)

    Me: “Well, ma’am, why don’t we go and see if we can find something on the racks that you like? We got some lovely new frames from [High End Brand] in just this week.”

    (After a LONG time of her trying on frames, I manage to convince her to buy a nice pair that looks good on her. She pays and leaves. A week later she calls us.)

    Me: “Thanks you for calling [Company]! How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Yeah, hi. I just weighed these glasses I bought and they weigh 12 grams more than my other pair! I want to return them!”

    Me: “Okay, you can come on in anytime to return them.”

    Customer: “Can’t you just give me my money back over the phone?”

    Me: “No. We need your original credit card and the glasses back.”

    (After she hung up, I looked into her file and discovered she’d returned one purchase of eyewear at least four times. Each time she picked a new frame, none of which seemed to be good enough for her!)

    Refunder Blunder, Part 4

    | Gaithersburg, MD, USA | At The Checkout, Themed Giveaway

    (I’m a part-time manager at a popular arts and crafts store. One of my cashiers has just called me on the radio to ask me to do a return for him. I am confused, but go up to find a customer we had dealt with two nights prior who had a bunch of returns and only had receipts for half of them. She has the receipt for a candle and a vase this time, but not for the other nine vases.)

    Customer: “I have a return card from before. You can just put the store credit from the ones without the receipt on there.”

    Me: “It doesn’t always work, but I can sure try. Let me just get these all scanned in.”

    (I put in her driver’s license number as I would for any return without a receipt and the system declines the return. This happens sometimes as a measure to prevent fraud if a customer is found to be doing a lot of high-dollar value of returns with no receipt.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t process this return. There’s a number on that slip there that you can call for more information.”

    Customer: “What? So, you won’t give me back my money?”

    Me: “No, sorry. It doesn’t give the exact reasons, but you can call that number for more information as to why the return was declined. I can’t bend the rules here.”

    Customer: “That’s illegal. Where does it say that you can refuse to do a return? I want to speak to your supervisor!”

    Me: “Well, I’m not sure, but I’ll go look in our database to find you some proof.”

    (I go to the office and print out the policy for returns, cut out the simple return policy, and highlight the first line which states ‘[Store Chain] reserves the right to refuse any return regardless of receipt,’ which I then give to the customer.)

    Me: “There you go. As you can see, the first line clearly says we can refuse to refund you.”

    Customer: “This is ridiculous! [Store Name] is really willing to lose business over $18? That’s a stupid policy. Other stores let you return anything no matter what.”

    Me: “Yes, well, they’re owned by different people and they probably work with different credit companies.”

    Customer: “They’re your competition and they’ve been around for a long time. Do you really want to go to small claims court over $18, because I will call my lawyer. You need to get a job at a store with more class.”

    Me: “Our store has actually been around for forty years. What I NEED, ma’am, is to finish my degree and start teaching. That was rather personal.”

    Customer: “You wanna be a teacher? Well, I’m a teacher. I’m an English teacher, and I write a lot. I write a lot of letters and this will be out there.”

    Me: “All right, ma’am. You can certainly call our corporate number to lodge any complaints. Have a nice night.”

    Refunder Blunder, Part 3
    Refunder Blunder, Part 2
    Refunder Blunder

    Past The Point Of No Return, Part 5

    | Columbus, OH, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Themed Giveaway

    (I am working the returns desk. If a customer returns too many times under an ID instead of a receipt, it blocks them in our return system. To help out someone who just wants to use an ID, I warn them about what may happen and try to find the receipt in my computer first. A customer walks in with some closet doors to return.)

    Me: “Hello. Do you have your receipt or the card you may have paid with?”

    Customer: “No, just use my ID.”

    Me: “Are you sure you don’t want me to try and find it? If you use your ID too many times it will block you.”

    Customer: *suddenly very angry* “Look! I am a contractor and I am registered with your corporate as a contractor, so I can make as many ID returns I want! So why don’t you just shut up and do your d*** job, or is your job too hard?!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I was just trying to help out. I wasn’t aware you were a contractor and were registered with corporate.”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t need your f****** help. Do your d*** job, you stupid idiot. I buy from here all the time and have never been treated so rudely!”

    Me: “I AM doing my job, sir, by informing you of some policy you may not have known about. I also politely request you watch your language. You are in a public place and are being very rude to me and the people around you.”

    Customer: “I will be rude to who ever I f****** want. I just want you to know you have completely ruined by whole day!” *starts storming off*

    Me: *in the most polite voice I can muster* “Well, I hope the rest of your day is fantastic, sir!”

    Customer: *flips me the bird* “F*** YOU!”

    Past The Point Of No Return, Part 4
    Past The Point Of No Return, Part 3
    Past The Point Of No Return, Part 2
    Past The Point Of No Return

    Deranged Exchange

    | Miami, FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Themed Giveaway

    (I work at an electronic cigarette store in a popular local mall. I have just returned from a month-long vacation. I’m counting inventory when a customer approaches.)

    Customer: “I bought this from you two weeks ago.”

    Me: “From me personally, sir? I’ve been on vacation for the last month, but I’d be happy to help yo—”

    Customer: “Yes. I’m sure it was you. The product isn’t working.”

    Me: “Can I take a look? Often times it’s a quick fix.”

    Customer: “No. I’d just like to exchange it.”

    Me: “Okay, sir. Do you have your receipt?”

    Customer: “No. Just give me a new one.”

    Me: “Sure. Let me see if I can diagnose the problem and perhaps you can keep the one you have after all. If not I’ll be happy to replace it.”

    Customer: “I didn’t bring it with me.”

    Me: “…”

    Customer: “Well? Are you going to exchange it?”

    Me: “Unfortunately I’m unable to process an exchange without you giving me the product back.”

    Customer: “Just give me another one for free!”

    Me: “Sir, as I stated, I unfortunately cannot give you a new product for free without receiving the old one from you.”

    Customer: “Fine. In that case I’d like to return it.”

    Me: “Again, sir. I cannot give you back your money if you do not have the product to return to me.”


    Me: *remaining calm* “So, let me get this straight: you want to return your product and get your money back, but you don’t have the actual product to ‘return’ to me?”


    (The man pushes me. I am a bit shocked that this has escalated so quickly but I keep my composure.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, but that will not be possible.”


    Me: “I would be happy to provide you with the number of the local police department if you’d like. Then when they get here you can explain to them how you assaulted me and threatened to ‘kick my a**’ when I very nicely explained that I cannot process a return for an item that you are not actually returning.”

    Customer: “…”

    Me: “So, would you like that number? Or I can call if that would be more convenient for you, sir.”

    Customer: “Well… F*** you!” *storms off*

    Me: *yelling to the customer as he leaves* “You have a pleasant evening, too, sir!”

    No Returns And No Understanding

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Themed Giveaway

    (I usually work the floor and I happen to overhear a conversation as I am near the refunds counter.)

    Customer: “Hello. I’d like to return some clothes I’ve bought.”

    Cashier: “Sure. Do you have the receipt?”

    Customer: “Yep, I’ve got it right here.”

    (The customer then puts on the counter a bag from a different store and pulls out a receipt from said store.)

    Cashier: “Oh, sorry. I can’t return those. They weren’t bought from here.”

    Customer: “But I have the receipt for them. If I have a receipt, I can return what I’ve bought.”

    Cashier: “You can only return items to the store you purchased them from. These are from [Other Store], not here.”

    Customer: “I don’t understand. I have a receipt. Why won’t you give me a refund?!”

    Cashier: “Because they weren’t purchase from here.”

    Customer: “But I have the receipt. I did buy them!”

    Cashier: “You didn’t buy them from [Our Store Chain]. You bought them from [Other Store]. To get a refund you need to take it back to one of their stores.”

    Customer: “But why? If I have a receipt I can return it anywhere.”

    Cashier: “I can’t give you the refund because we never received the money . You didn’t buy the items from here, which therefore means we can’t resell the items, since we don’t stock them.”

    Customer: “Yes, but [Other Store] is so far away. I don’t have time to go there. I have my receipt. Please give me my money back.”

    Cashier: “We never received your money in the first place.”

    Customer: “So I’m not getting a refund?”

    Cashier: “Not from here I’m afraid.”

    (The customer begins to walk away, mumbling.)

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