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  • Bigotry Comes In All Shapes And Sizes
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  • April Themed Story Giveaway: Creepy Customers!
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    Category: Themed Giveaway

    Life Is Stranger Than The Fiction Section

    | SC, USA | Books & Reading, Themed Giveaway, Top, Wild & Unruly

    Me: “Sorry, you can’t check this out.”

    Patron: “Why not?”

    Me: “You have three overdue books.”

    Patron: “Is there anyway you can let this slide?”

    Me: “Nope.”

    (The patron proceeds to take off her shirt.)

    Patron: “How about now?”

    Me: “No. Please put on your shirt before I call the police.”

    (The patron then takes off her pants, pulls aside her underwear, and soaks the floor. It is carpet, so there is a lot of damage. My coworker calls the police.)

    Patron: “Now will you let it slide?”

    Me: “No.”

    Patron: “F*** you!”

    (She goes over to a shelf, puts her back against it, and pees all over. It splashes up and ruins several books. She also defecates, picks up one of the books, tears out several pages, and uses it to wipe. The police arrive, and she calls her boyfriend, who is apparently in another section. He pleads with the police to let her free, but they don’t let her. He then adds to the mess that his girlfriend has already made. The police take him too. Later, we find another section that is completely ruined. That must have been where the boyfriend was.)

    Diabetes Meets Rabies

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Health & Body, Themed Giveaway, Wild & Unruly

    (A customer is picking up some diabetic test-strips, and I am ringing him up.)

    Me: “How are you doing today, sir?”

    Customer: “I’m alright; how about yourself?”

    Me: “I’m doing great, thanks. Did you have any questions for the pharmacist?”

    (The customer gestures at the test strips, jokingly.)

    Customer: “Yeah, do I really have to poke myself for these to work?”

    Me: “Yep, I’m afraid so.”

    Customer: “Can’t I just poke you instead?”

    Me: *laughing* “Sorry, I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way, sir.”

    (The customer gestures at my multiple facial piercings.)

    Customer: “You look like the type that would enjoy that, though.”

    Me: “Your doctor might have a problem with that, though.”

    (When a customer picks up a prescription, they’re required by law to sign, stating that they’ve received it. Our pharmacy does this through an electronic prompt. The customer looks at it.)

    Customer: “What’s this?”

    Me: “It’s just a way to say that you’ve gotten your prescription. That way there’s no confusion later. It’s as much for your protection as ours really.”

    Customer: “Well what happens if I don’t sign it?”

    Me: “Then unfortunately, we’re not allowed to give you your prescriptions.”


    (The customer THROWS the electronic pen across the counter, hitting me in the face. He turns, and practically skips away. The pharmacist and I aren’t sure if he is joking, but by the end of the day he still hasn’t come back!)

    When Patience Is Paper Thin

    | Howell, MI, USA | Technology, Themed Giveaway, Wild & Unruly

    (A customer comes into the copy and print area while I’m helping another customer and her son. After ignoring my greeting, she goes over to the customer color-copy machines, and starts making copies.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, but why am I being charged $0.49 a copy, when that sign says black and white are only $0.09?”

    (The customer points to the sign over the black and white copy machines that advertise $0.09 a copy.)

    Me: “You’re using the color machine, not a black and white. It’ll charge you $0.49 a copy when you use it.”

    (I point to the sign above the color machine that states just that.)

    Customer: “Well, can’t it see that I’m not copying color pages?”

    Me: “No, it doesn’t have that sort of capability. It only knows that it is used for color copies, and charges accordingly.”

    Customer: “Well why didn’t you stop me before I started making copies?!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I didn’t know you only had black and white pages. I can return your money and help you on the black and white machine if you would like.”

    (The customer hands me the credit card she used to make the copies, and I refund her money. As I start to walk towards the black and white she pushes past me.)

    Customer: “I don’t need your God-d*** help. You did enough already!”

    (I return to the other customer and her son, and continue talking about his school project that he needs printed and finished. Five minutes go by, and the older woman has a stack of approximately 250 papers in her hand. She walks up to me and interrupts my conversation with the other customers.)

    Customer: “I need these cut.”

    Me: “We charge $2 for every 500 pieces of paper cut, per cut.”

    Customer: “$2! Just for a few pieces of paper to be cut?! You must be out of your d*** mind! I’ll do them myself!”

    (I show her to the small hand-cutter. I show her how it works, using only a few sheets of paper at a time. Only five seconds after I turn away, she starts shouting again.)

    Customer: “THIS. ISN’T. WORKING!”

    (I turn around to find that she has stuffed a quarter of her stack of papers under the blade. Every time she tries to cut, she rips the papers.)

    Me: “Ma’am, you’re only supposed to do a maximum of 10 sheets at a time, like I showed you.”


    (The other customer and her son, and other nearby customers and associates are now watching as this angry customer fumes at me.)

    Me: “I offered to cut them for you, and it was too much money. I showed how to properly cut them using the hand cutter, and you didn’t follow what I said. I don’t understand what you want me to do.”


    Me: “I’m not going to do that. I showed you how to cut them, and you didn’t listen. I have every right to refuse, especially after treating me with disrespect.”


    (The customer screams, grabs the ruined papers, and throws them into the air before storming off into another area of the store with her few good copies.)

    Running A Mile With Another Man’s Shoes

    | KY, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Themed Giveaway, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (At the store I manage, we put sensors on expensive shoes. My sales manager comes up to inform me she has heard a customer popping one off of a shoe. I approach the customer.)

    Me: “Hello, how are you doing today? Do you need any assistance?”

    (I notice a sensor sitting next to him. I pick it up and hold it in my hand while assisting him. He picks up a shoe box, and starts to walk away.)

    Customer: “No, I’m good.”

    (He proceeds to look around the store while I follow him; I’m still holding the sensor. He puts the box he is carrying on a shelf, and starts to make his way out the door. I pick up the box to find it empty. He is walking down the sidewalk, so I run after him.)

    Me: “Sir, give me back those shoes!”

    Customer: “I don’t know what you’re talking about; you’re crazy!”

    (He proceeds to run across the parking lot, with me in hot pursuit.)

    Me: “Help! Help! Criminal! Criminal!”

    (I am a small, 5’ young woman, chasing a 6’ man in his 30s. I start to lose steam, and am losing him. Out of nowhere, a security guard runs past me. The customer does not notice the guard, but starts dropping shoes out of his pants one by one. Thinking I am lagging behind, he turns back to pick up the shoes. He notices the security guard, and starts to run again. A car pulls up and tries to hit the shoplifter. He doesn’t hit him, but slows the man enough to allow the security guard to catch up. They proceed to wrestle, and the security guard takes the customer down. In the end, the customer is arrested, and I get all the shoes back!)

    They Need A Backup Sign

    | OR, USA | Themed Giveaway, Top, Transportation, Wild & Unruly

    (A customer pulls up to the pumps, but her tank is on the other side of the car.)

    Me: “Sorry, ma’am, can you back up and go to the other side of the pump?”

    (The customer gets a look of sheer and utter panic.)

    Customer: “No! I don’t backup. You do it. I don’t know how.”

    (The customer tries to give me the keys to her car.)

    Me: “Uhm, sorry but no, ma’am. I am not allowed to get in a customer’s car, or drive it. If you don’t want to back up you can pull forward out of the lot, circle the block, and try again.”

    Customer: “No! That will take too long. How do I backup?! Can’t you do it?”

    Me: “Well, you shift you car into reverse, and gently press on the gas. It will go backwards. When you have gone past the pump press your brake, shift back to drive and pull up on the other side.”

    (She stares at me like I am speaking a foreign language. With a little more coaching and pointing from me, she manages to get her car in reverse. She then slams her foot on the gas, backs up all the way across the station, and slams into the sign that shows our gas prices, wrecking the sign, and the back of her car.)

    Customer: “THIS IS YOUR FAULT!”

    Me: “Actually, lady, it’s yours. And I think a little blame goes to whoever gave you a license without teaching you to backup.”

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