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    Category: Themed Giveaway

    Reminder: Tourists & Travelers Themed Giveaway

    | Not Always Right | Announcements, Themed Giveaway, Tourists/Travel
    Want to win a Not Always Right t-shirt?
    Enter Not Always Right’s August Themed Story Giveaway:
    Tourists & Travelers!

    Entering is as easy as 1-2-3:

    1. Submit a funny or interesting story about tourist & traveler customers.
    2. Enter your email address in the form to qualify.
    3. All posted stories will be entered in a drawing to win a free t-shirt gift certificate, to use in the official Not Always Right shop!

    PS: winners will be announced the first Wednesday of every month. Next free t-shirt gift certificate: Wednesday, September 4!

    Some Stupidity Needs To Be Caught On Montevideo

    | Orlando, FL, USA | Geography, Themed Giveaway, Tourists/Travel

    (At the theme park I work at, our name tags have our hometown on them. Despite the fact that I have lived in Orlando since I was an infant, my name tag says I am from Uruguay, since that is where I was born.)

    Guest: “It’s so terrible they make you work here.”

    Me: “I actually quite enjoy my job. I like seeing people enjoy their vacations.”

    Guest: “Yeah, but what about your vacation?”

    Me: “My vacation?”

    Guest: “They shouldn’t ruin your vacation by making you work.”

    Me: “No, I think you misunderstand. I work here. I live in the area, and I go to school down the road. The park isn’t my vacation; it’s my job, and I enjoy it.”

    Guest: “Oh, honey., do they tell you to lie? You’re from Uruguay; it would be stupid to commute all this way for a job.”

    Has No Train Of Thought

    | Edinburgh, Scotland, UK | Crazy Requests, Technology, Themed Giveaway, Tourists/Travel, Transportation

    (I work near a property of the Royal Family’s, which is open to the public unless a member of the Royal Family is in residence. Today, this happens to be the case, due to a homecoming procession for a returning regiment. Most tourists hoping to visit have been quite accepting of this, but one American tourist is not.)

    Tourist: “Why can’t I get into the castle?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, the Palace is closed to the public today because Princess Anne is in residence for the homecoming procession. It’ll be open tomorrow.”

    Tourist: “I’m not here tomorrow! I’m only here today! Why didn’t they hold it tomorrow, so I could go today?!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but in fairness they can’t have been aware of your travel plans.”

    Tourist: “Bull-s***! I booked all of my train and plane tickets online!”

    Me: “Good for you, sir, but I don’t understand.”

    Tourist: “On the internet! They should have checked whether or not people are only going to be here for one day! It’s on the internet, so they can check, obviously! Are you an idiot? Stupid little girls that don’t even speak real English!”

    (A soldier walking past the shop looks in, and hears the tourist ranting.)

    Soldier: “Sir, do you have a problem with the British military or royalty?”

    (The soldier is wearing a large knife on his belt, and carrying a rifle. The angry tourist quickly leaves.)

    Predicting A Storm Of Protest

    | Boulder, CO, USA | Geography, Math & Science, Themed Giveaway, Tourists/Travel

    (I work at an answering service that handles after-hours calls for various businesses. One of the accounts was a nice restaurant in the mountains of Colorado. A man calls one April to make a reservation.)

    Caller: “I was hoping for a table on May 16th?”

    Me: “It looks like there are various times open, so I can certainly set that up for you.”

    Caller: “Okay, great. I’m going to be vacationing up there with my wife.”

    Me: “Well, that sounds lovely!”

    (We set up his dinner reservation.)

    Caller: “So, can you give me any advice about what I should pack for a long weekend there? What is the weather like?”

    Me: “Well sir, Colorado weather is very unpredictable, particularly in the spring. I would advise bringing clothing options for all seasons and dressing in layers.”

    Caller: “I just want to know if I should pack warm clothes or short sleeves!”

    Me: “Yes, sir, I understand that. However, springtime in Colorado has weather ranging from snowstorms to hot and sunny.”

    Caller: “Oh, what nonsense. You clearly don’t know what you’re talking about.”

    Me: “Sir, I have lived in this state all my life. A common saying here is that if you don’t like the weather you should wait five minutes, and that holds true all year. Spring and autumn are the most unpredictable and varied when it comes to temperature, so—”

    Caller: “What was the temperature today?”

    Me: “Today? Well, this morning it was thirty degrees with heavy frost on the ground, and by noon it was about seventy-five with clear skies and sunshine—”

    Caller: “Are you trying to be difficult? There’s no reason to be a smart-a**, you know.”

    Me: “No, sir, not at all. I’m very genuinely trying to help you. Even for people who are used to it, weather changes here can be quite—”

    Caller: “You’re no help at all! I’ll just bring a few pairs of shorts and t-shirts.”

    Me: “Sir, please don’t do that. You will need warmer clothes in the mountains!”

    Caller: “So, now I should bring my winter clothes? Why didn’t you just say so?!”

    Me: “Well, you should, but bring some cooler clothes as well because—”

    Caller: “No! It has to be one or the other! I don’t want to bring more than I need!”

    Me: “You will definitely NEED options for highly variable temperatures. I’m very sorry, but—”

    Caller: “You’re useless! It’s just four days. It can’t be that complicated!”

    Me: “Look, four days ago it was shorts and tank top weather. Two days ago it snowed for a day and a night. I personally keep a heavy coat and a pair of sandals in my car because there are days when I need them both. Believe me, I wish it were all nice and predictable, but it really IS that complicated. I’m not making this up for fun.”

    Caller: “Oh, I’ve never heard such nonsense. Springtime is bound to be nice, so I’ll pack for that. Thanks for nothing!”

    Me: “Sir, I really advise—”

    Caller: “And cancel the dinner reservation!” *click*

    (May 16th turns out to be a properly variable week, with wind, rain, sun, and overnight snow.)

    The New Boeing Tardis

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Extra Stupid, Themed Giveaway, Transportation

    (I have to catch a flight leaving at about 6 am. I show up at the self-check-in counters at 5 am, only to discover that my ticket won’t register.)

    Airline Rep: “Is there a problem, ma’am?”

    Me: “Uh, I think so. I’ve swiped my passport, punched in my ticket number, put in my name, and it’s not registering.”

    (The airline rep takes my information and tries it herself; the machine still doesn’t register. She looks at my itinerary.)

    Airline Rep: “Well, ma’am, I think your main problem is that your flight doesn’t leave until tomorrow.”


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