(I work at a piroshky bakery and have just started my morning shift. A customer comes in with a very obnoxious, self-important attitude.)

Me: “Good morning, sir! What can I get for you today?”

Self-important Customer: “What’s your freshest thing?”

Me: “Well, we just opened so everything is fresh out of the oven. I could warm one up if it’s not warm enough for you.”

Self-important Customer: *shakes his head* “No, I don’t want it warmed up.”

(He looks behind me to our rack where we put our piroshkies until we need to set them out.)

Self-important Customer: *points to rack* “What’s that there on the top?”

Me: “Those are our potato mushrooms, sir, although they’ve been out of the oven about the same time as our others so it’d be easier if I just got you one from—”

Self-important Customer: “No, I want one from back there.”

(I mentally sigh but go ahead and do as he asks since it’s a slow morning and there’s only a couple people in line. I turn to grab his order but he stops me.)

Self-important Customer: “Wait!” *points at rack again* “What are those?”

(There are at least 7 different types of piroshkies on the rack.)

Me: “Um, which ones, sir?”

Self-important Customer: “Those ones!”

(I look at him quizzically.)

Self-important Customer: “The ones on the second row!”

Me: “Oh, those are our Moscows. They’ve got Bavarian cream and Cream of Wheat in it which gives it—”

Self-important Customer: “I’ll take one of those.”

(We haven’t set one out yet, so my supervisor has to take out the whole pan and sprinkle powdered sugar on it. I grab everything for him and bag it up.)

Me: “All right, sir. Is there anything else I can get for you?”

Self-important Customer: “No, that’ll be all.”

(He pays and leaves. I run through a couple more customers until I get to a young guy.)

Young Guy: *saunters up to the counter* “Hey so, uh, what’s the freshest thing you got here?”

Me: “Pretty much everything just came out the oven.”

Young Guy: “Yeah, but I want really fresh, and like, potato mushroom.”

(I sort of stare at him then move to grab a potato mushroom. He starts laughing.)

Young Guy: “I’m just kidding with you, man. Did you see that guy?” *begins to imitate him* “I want the freshest thing you got!” *goes back to normal* “You’re in a bakery in the morning, man, everything’s fresh!”

(At this point everyone in the bakery is laughing. I get his order, still chuckling, and bag everything up for him.)

Me: “That’s going to be [price], please.”

(He pays and my supervisor steps up.)

Supervisor: “Wait, give him one for free. That was too funny!”

(I work as a sales person. It’s about ten minutes until and I am vacuuming the back of the store. I can’t do the front because of a customer.)

Customer: “Vacuum.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Go ahead, vacuum. I don’t mind.”

Me: “Are you sure?”

Customer: “Yeah. I’m the owner of a shop. I know what it’s like when idiots like me come in right on closing and you’re trying to clean.”

(I’m visiting my long distance boyfriend in London. We decide to stop for lunch during our walk through the streets of London. I’m from Canada.)

Worker: “So, your total is [total].”

(I hand him a little more than he asked for.)

Me: “Keep the change.”

(He looks confused for a moment and tries to give me back the money.)

Me: “No, no, keep the change. It’s money for you.”

Worker: “What…?”

My Boyfriend: *to me* “In London, no one ever uses the term, ‘keep the change.’ It’s unheard of for people working behind the counters to get tips.”

Me: “Oh, geez… I had no idea.” *to the worker* “I’m actually from Canada. Over there, we use the term ‘keep the change’ when we don’t really need the change back. It’s considered giving a tip. I honestly had no idea that you guys here didn’t do that. Still, it’s just a little bit of money and I don’t need it that badly. Go ahead and pocket it. It’s for you!”

Worker: *huge smile* “Thank you for explaining!”

(He kept the change. It seemed like such a minor cultural difference, but I think we both learned something that day!)

Me: “Hi, can you please fill it up with regular?”

Employee: “Sure, no prob—Wait!”

Me: “Is there a problem with my card? Can I use my debit card instead?”

Employee: “No, no! The card’s fine! You’re the nice customer!”

Me: “…I’m sorry. I don’t know what you’re referring to.”

Employee: “You were filling up your gas tank earlier this month. It was my first week of training and I was trying to figure out the machines because I used to work at a station where we brought credit cards inside to be processed. This crazy lady started screaming at me because she got charged for premium gas and she didn’t want it. Then your credit card didn’t work because I forgot to hit some buttons or something. While she spent 10 minutes screaming at me, you waited there patiently without screaming at me or trying to get my attention. It was only after she left that I realized your car hadn’t been filled yet. You didn’t say anything mean; you just smiled and told me not to worry about it.”

Me: “Oh yeah… I remember that lady. Boy, wasn’t she a bundle of joy to be around? Has she been back since?”

Employee: “Maybe? Well, I told my coworker Eddie about you and he said you’re the only customer who consistently is polite and says “Please” and “Thank you” and you’re the only who treats us as equal human beings! Thank you for that!”

Me: “Wow… well, you’re welcome. Just try to avoid crazy customers! Stay warm!”

Employee: “Seriously, thank you! You have no idea how nice it is!”

(I have seen only one customer all day: a regular contractor who normally goes to another location.)

Me: “Hey! What do you need?”

Contractor: “Just a roller sleeve; am I the first you’ve had all day?”

Coworker: “Well, with the roller you’re buying, so far we’ve made $13.79 today.”

Contractor: *throws a $50 bill on the counter* “Wow. Use the change to buy some magazines and snacks so you aren’t just sitting here anymore.”

Me: “Thank you! Oh, wow! You should keep this, but thank you so much. I’m dying of boredom!”

(Five years later, all I remember about that job was how awful my boss was, and how nice the contractor was every time he came in, no matter what was happening or how long it took to get his paint. He was always wanting the employees to be happy, and whenever he walked in we were.)