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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Category: Themed Giveaway

    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 8

    | Helsinki, Finland | At The Checkout, Technology, Themed Giveaway, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m a customer at a popular independent games store in Helsinki. The store is very busy at the moment. I’m third in line when a customer storms in and rushes to the counter.)

    Customer: “Hey! I want my money back!”

    (The cashier completely ignores him, and keeps serving the customer whose actual turn it is.)

    Customer: “Hey! Nerd! I’m talking to you!”

    (The cashier still ignores him and serves the next customer.)

    Customer: “F****** nerd! Listen to me!”

    (When I am next in line the customer tries to grab the cashier’s hand. He manages to avoid this. The cashier looks at me as if asking for permission to deal with the angry customer. I nod and the cashier finally talks to the angry customer.)

    Cashier: “There is no way that you are going to get any help from me before I finish serving all these other customers who are politely waiting in line.”

    Customer: “F*** that! I have a complaint and I want my money back! Serve me now or you’re going to get your a** kicked!”

    (The customer is a big man and the cashier is quite small and skinny. Luckily, at 6’6″ I am even bigger, and having played hockey all my life I’m quite fit as well.)

    Me: “No, he is not going to get his a** kicked.”

    (The customer turns to me to yell something, but as he sees me he goes quiet. He turns to back to the cashier and continues his rant in a much calmer but still angry and derogatory tone.)

    Customer: “Listen, you little s***. I want my money back from this game.”

    (He waves a copy of ‘Grand Theft Auto V’.)

    Cashier: “I absolutely refuse to serve you before all these other customers, who are being patient and polite. You will get service from me after everyone who acts nicer than you has been helped first.”

    Customer: “Get me your manager! Now!”

    Cashier: “I am the owner. Now you go to the back of the line.”

    (The customer starts to say something, but I push past him in a not very gentle way. He goes to the back of the line muttering. I buy my game but decide to stay in the store until the angry customer leaves. When it’s finally his turn he slams the game on the counter.)

    Customer: “Money back!”

    (The cashier opens the case and looks at the game.)

    Cashier: “Looks perfect to me. Why do you want your money back?”

    Customer: “The game is totally inappropriate for my son! No one told me it was so violent when I bought it!”

    Cashier: “I clearly remember you buying it. You had your son with you, who looked to be about 10 years old. I told you it has sex, killing, torture, crime, and drugs in it. I advised you several times not to buy it. You even told me it was for you, not your son. My guess is that the boy’s mother threw a fit after seeing the game and now you are taking it out on me. You will not get your money back. Ever. And you are not welcome in my store anymore.”

    Customer: “Look here, you little—”

    (I have walked to stand behind the customer. I cough and he turns to me and goes pale. He leaves without saying a word.)

    Cashier: “Thanks, man!”

    Me: “No problem, I love the way you handled him. Maybe a little provocative but he deserved every minute of it.”

    Cashier: “He was a complete a**hole when he bought the game, and the minute I saw him today I guessed what his issue was. Customers like that are the reason I started my own store. I hate to see bullies get special treatment for acting threatening and being difficult, while all the nice customers wait. I try to be as slow and difficult as possible to customers like him. Honestly, their business is not worth it.”

    (The store is still thriving. I guess there are still enough nice customers out there!)

    Related:
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 7
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 6
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 5
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 4
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 3
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 2
    Grand Theft Innocence

    Putting Themselves Into A Sticky Spot

    | Bismarck, ND, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Liars & Scammers, Themed Giveaway

    Customer: “I’d like to return this game.”

    (He hands me a sports title, which is several years old.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t accept open game returns, particularly games purchased at a competing store.”

    Customer: “I purchased the d*** thing here!”

    Me: “I’m afraid you didn’t. We don’t open games and put [competing company]‘s stickers on the cases.”

    Customer: “Well, why the f*** not?”

    February Themed Story Giveaway: Returnaholics!

    | Not Always Right | Announcements, Themed Giveaway
    Want to win a Not Always Right t-shirt?
    Enter Not Always Right’s February Themed Story Giveaway:
    Returnaholics!

    Entering is as easy as 1-2-3:

    1. Submit a funny or interesting story about customers who return products frequently or inappropriately.
    2. Enter your email address in the form to qualify.
    3. All posted stories will be entered in a drawing to win a free t-shirt gift certificate, to use in the official Not Always Right shop!

    PS: Congratulations to a lucky reader for winning January’s Themed Story Giveaway, which featured stories about outrageous demands. The winning submission: The Whole Nine Yards Of Unreason (1391 thumbs up).

    PS #2: winners will be announced the first Wednesday of every month. Next free t-shirt gift certificate: Wednesday, March 5!

    Off-Color Customers

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Home Improvement, Themed Giveaway

    (A customer comes up to me with several bathmats. I am the only staff member in a large store; my coworker is at lunch.)

    Me: “Hi. Can I help you?”

    Customer #1: “I need to know which of these you think will suit my bathroom.”

    Me: “I have no idea what your bathroom looks like.”

    Customer #1: “Well, it has…” *mutters off strange colour combination I don’t quite understand* “…and black on the floor. Which one suits my bathroom?”

    (This goes back and forth for several minutes. Finally I have had enough.)

    Me: *pointing to one* “That one will suit.”

    Customer #1: “Are you sure? I need one for toilet, one for wash hands and one for…” *struggles to find word*

    Me: “Bathtub?”

    (I go and get him another set, but he is upset that there will be two contour mats for the toilet.)

    Me: “You will need to wash that one more often, so two would be good.”

    Customer #1: “I look for more. You come.”

    Me: “No, you look. I am the only one in the store at the moment and there is another customer waiting.”

    (I turn to the other customer, vainly hoping for an easy sale.)

    Me: “Hi. Can I help you?”

    Customer #2: “I need jersey fabric. Can you show me where it is?”

    Me: “Okay. I can show you quickly. I do need to back to the counter as I am the only one on the floor right now.”

    (I take her to the jersey fabrics and point them out to her.)

    Customer #2: “I need five colours.”

    Me: “Okay. I’ll just leave you to choose them. Bring them to the counter when you are ready.”

    Customer #2: “I need your help choosing them.”

    Me: “Sorry. I really need to be back at the counter, as I’ve already explained.”

    Customer #2: “How long until someone comes back and you can do it?”

    Me: “20 minutes.”

    Customer #2: “I’ll come back.”

    (I go back to the counter to find that Customer #1 is back there.)

    Customer #1: *with other bathmats* “Will these suit my bathroom?”

    (I eventually sell Customer #1 the two sets of mats in the colour I chose. After 20 minutes, my coworker has come back and Customer #2 comes back in.)

    Customer #2: *haughtily* “Can you serve me now?”

    Me: “Yes, I can. Sorry about before. That customer was really doing my head in. Do you need help finding colours?”

    Customer #2: “No. I know exactly what colours I need.”

    (All Customer #2 wanted me for was to hold up fabric while she ‘ummed’ and ‘ahhed’ over the colour, as well as carry the very light rolls to the counter!)

    Life Is Stranger Than Movie Fiction

    | New Zealand | Crazy Requests, Movies & TV, Themed Giveaway

    (I work as a cinema attendant at a movie theatre. I am working at one of the registers when a customer storms up to my till.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, but are you the manager?”

    Me: “No, but I would be happy to fetch them for you. What is the issue, just in case I can help you out?”

    Customer: “The movie I just watched was absolutely ridiculous, and I couldn’t stand it. I want my money back for it!”

    Me: “Oh, which movie was it?”

    (The customer states the name of a movie which had just finished screening, after she had sat through the entire movie.)

    Customer: “I also want my money back for my combo as well. The popcorn was just FAR too salty!”

    (The customer has about a quarter of a large box of popcorn left in her hand, after having eaten all the rest.)

    Me: “Ma’am, we can’t actually refund tickets for movies that you watched all the way through. If you had come out after about 15 to 20 minutes, we could have, but not after you’ve seen the entire thing. We also can’t give refunds on food that has already been eaten.”

    Customer: “That is so stupid. What kind of customer service is this? I paid for this food and that movie, but I didn’t enjoy it. Surely you are meant to keep the customer happy?!”


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