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    Category: Technology

    The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

    PINheaded, Part 3

    | Brisbane, Australia | At The Checkout, Money, Technology

    (In Australia when you pay by card, you can either use a pin number or sign for your purchase if you pay by card. Regardless, you need to have your card on you.)

    Me: “Okay, so the total is $17.”

    Customer: *comes up $2 short* “Oh, I don’t have enough. I’ll just run to my car to get the $2.”

    Me: “Oh, here, I’ll save the transaction and keep your bags back here for you.”

    Customer: “Oh, I’ll just pay with my bank card!”

    Me: “Okay, go ahead.”

    Customer: “I have… a pin.”

    Me: “Alrighty, then. Did you have your card?”

    Customer: “Yes.” *stares at me*

    Me: “Ma’am, you have to put your card in the machine.”

    Customer: “I HAVE A PIN! I DON’T SIGN!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you have to put your card in the machine for it to take the payment.”

    (The customer mutters something about getting the $2 and walks off. I save the order and continue serving other customers. Returning with her money, the woman proceeds to cut the line and slams the correct money on the counter. I process the payment and think she’s about to leave when she starts yelling again.)

    Customer: “So, you’re telling me I have to keep my card with me all the time to pay, even though I have a pin?!”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. The computer can’t process the payment unless the card is in the machine. It doesn’t matter if you have a pin or sign for it.”

    Customer: “BUT I HAVE A PIN!” *storms off*

    Related:
    Pinheaded, Part 2
    PINheaded

    The Custo-Me Is Always Right

    | NY, USA | Technology

    (Our store has recently put in a computerized ticketing system that shows us the numbers customers have taken. It also allows customers to place an order at a kiosk and pick it up later. The only difference to a customer coming up to the counter is the placement of the tickets, and that they now have to press a button instead of pushing a lever.)

    Customer: “Why did you have to change the ticket system? It was fine the way it was!”

    Coworker: “I don’t know, ma’am. They don’t tell us.”

    Customer: “Yeah, well, they shouldn’t fix what isn’t broken.”

    Coworker: “They just wanted the new technology, I think, so people can place orders at the kiosk now.”

    Customer: “But if we want things a specific way, the kiosk is useless!”

    Me: “That’s true. However, some customers like the convenience of it, especially for short trips to the store.”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t use it, so it’s useless!”

    It Pays To Be Patient

    | Calgary, Canada | Awesome Customers, Money, Technology, Top

    (I am a waitress. One of my customers has just finished eating and is using a debit card to pay for his meal. The machine automatically includes a step giving the option to include a tip.)

    Customer: “I don’t understand technology. This machine isn’t working. It won’t let me leave a tip!”

    (The machine clearly gives three options: Leave a tip in a dollar amount, a percentage amount, or skip the tip.)

    Me: “Well, sir, you have three choices: a dollar amount, a percentage amount, or no tip. To choose one, press the button directly underneath it on the screen, and the machine will take you to the next step.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay!”

    (He proceeds to type in a dollar amount, but the machine does nothing since he has not chosen the dollar option.)

    Customer: “It still doesn’t work! They made this machine far too difficult to use!”

    Me: “Okay, well, I’ll just explain your options to you again…”

    (This time, I physically point to each of the three buttons as I explain the difference between the three options.)

    Customer: “Oh, okay!”

    (He again proceeds to type a dollar amount without choosing an option.)

    Customer: “The machine doesn’t work!”

    Me: “Okay, sir, if you want to add a tip as a dollar amount, press the first button there labelled ‘$’. The machine will take you to the next step, and then you can enter the amount you wish to leave.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay!”

    (He still doesn’t get it. I end up explaining about 7 more times until he finally pushes the button to proceed to the next step.)

    Customer: “Oh… well, that was easy! I don’t know why it took so long for me to understand that. Thank you for being so patient. I’m going to leave you $1 for every time you had to explain it to me!”

    (He ended up leaving me a $10 tip. His meal had only amounted to $25. Definitely one of the best customers I’ve had!)

    Taxing Faxing, Part 10

    | Orlando, FL, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I work at a hotel, which often requires that paperwork be sent to us to verify credit cards and the like. On this particular occasion I am working with a customer whose assistant is out of town and she clearly has no idea what she is doing. Having sent me the wrong paperwork, I call her back.)

    Me: “Ma’am? It appears that we have received the wrong paperwork, so if you could just fax the correct one we will be able to get everything set up for you.”

    Customer: “Okay, but can you just fax that back to me, then?”

    Me: “What?”

    Customer: “Those papers! If they’re wrong, I need them back. Send them back to me!”

    Me: “Uh… ma’am, that might be a bit redundant, but I’d be more than happy to destroy the copy—”

    Customer: “ARE YOU STUPID? DON’T DESTROY THEM! THAT’S THE ONLY COPY I HAVE! JUST FAX THEM BACK!”

    (It dawns on me that this customer thinks that her fax machine actually manages to somehow transport the entire paper through her machine to mine.)

    Me: “Ma’am, the fax machine sends me a copy of the documents. If you check your fax machine, you will clearly see the paperwork still laying there. It doesn’t take your original.”

    (I hear a frustrated sigh as she slams the phone, and then muttering and shuffling as she goes through her office. After a minute, she comes back to her phone.)

    Customer: “…sorry.” *hangs up quickly*

    Related:
    Taxing Faxing, Part 9
    Taxing Faxing, Part 8
    Taxing Faxing, Part 7
    Taxing Faxing, Part 6
    Taxing Faxing, Part 5
    Taxing Faxing, Part 4
    Taxing Faxing, Part 3
    Taxing Faxing, Part 2
    Taxing Faxing

    Check Out The Living Minerals Aisle

    | North Carolina, USA | Pets & Animals, Technology

    (I work in the fishing department at a sporting goods store. We usually get calls asking our opinion on what equipment to use.)

    Caller: “Hi, is this the fishing department?”

    Me: “Yes, sir. How may I help you?”

    Caller: “I need to know the best rod and reel to use to catch a rocktail fish.”

    Me: “Where is it you are trying to catch it?”

    Caller: “Oh, it’s a fish in Runescape. So, what should I use?”

    (Note: I don’t play Runescape, but know that it’s a computer game.)

    Me: “Sir, are you asking advice on what rod/reel to catch a digital fish?”

    Caller: “Oh… I didn’t really think this through, did I?”


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