October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

Taking The Credit And The Blame

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

(I work in a newsagent that sells prepaid credit for mobile phones. The computer that prints out an individualised code to redeem the credit is unable to perform refunds so it is important that our staff triple checks the transaction before we hit the final OKAY. Sometimes customers would find this a little irritating. It was especially important because two of the different phone companies you could buy credit with had similar names. One was one of the major phone companies in Australia, the other very rarely purchased.)

Me: “Sir, I would just like to confirm that you would like to purchase $30 credit to use with your [Less Popular Brand] phone company.”

Customer: “For the last time, yes. How many times do you have to ask me?”

Me: “I do apologise, sir, but we are required to ask twice per transaction because I cannot give you a refund if you change your mind. I have asked you a third time to be extra careful because you have ordered the [Less Popular Brand] which people often misread as the [Popular Brand] one.”

Customer: “It is absolutely right. It is 100% definitely the [Less Popular Brand].”

(I complete the transaction and wish him a wonderful afternoon with a large grin, despite his grumpy attitude. Half an hour later, he storms back into the store, demanding to talk to my manager.)

Customer: “This d*** b**** sold me the wrong f****** credit! I want a refund! I am going to buy my credit card from the other f****** newsagent in the shopping centre!”

(He continued to rant for another ten minutes before my manager realised it wasn’t worth the hassle and gave him a refund. Note: he did go to the other newsagent to buy his phone credit but I don’t think he realised it was the same franchise, with the same owners.)

Time To Play The Trump Card

| Canberra, ACT, Australia | At The Checkout, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(I am at the register at work putting through a sale. The customer’s card has declined twice but instead of getting embarrassed or giving me another card like most people, this guy decides to get angry.)

Customer: “No, I don’t want to use another card!”

Me: “Then how would you like to pay sir? I do accept cash.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! Your machine is broken!”

Me: “I assure you it isn’t broken. The person before you paid by card and it went through perfectly.”

Customer: “Then you’re not doing your job!”

Me: *losing the friendly retail face and looking him dead in the eye* “Sir, I’ve worked in retail for 10 years. I have bought goods and services for 15 years. I know how to use an eftpos machine. I cannot be held responsible for your card. Perhaps you should contact your bank on Monday?”

(The customer leaves in a huff after throwing some cash at me.)

Next Person In Line: “Jesus, what was HIS problem? It’s an eftpos machine, not a freakin’ tardis!”

Should Keep Better Account Of Her Account

| SD, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a library that offers computer services to patrons. We get a lot of people who don’t know anything about computers.)

Patron: “Can you help me out? The computer won’t let me check my email.”

Me: “Sure. Let’s see what’s wrong.”

(We walk over to her computer.)

Patron: “Now see, I put in my email address and hit enter and it doesn’t sign me in!”

Me: “Well, first of all, you’re on the Google search engine, not an email site. If you have Gmail, then you click on that little button right there that says ‘Gmail’ and then you can enter your email address and password.”

Patron: “I don’t have Gmail. I have Yahoo!”

Me: “So you’re trying to access your Yahoo email through the Google search bar by typing in your email address and hitting enter?”

Patron: “Yes! It won’t let me on! Fix it!”

Me: “Okay, one second.” *types in Yahoo mail into the address bar* “There. Now put in your email address and password and it will sign you in. You need to be on the Yahoo mail site to access your yahoo mail.”

Patron: “Password? I don’t have a password!”

Should Keep Better Account Of His Account

Taxing Faxing, Part 12

| NH, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a small public library with a self-service fax machine. The machine walks you through sending a fax with an automated verbal prompt. A coworker comes to find me at my desk.)

Coworker: “Can you lift the fax machine up?”

Me: “What? Why?”

Coworker: “She got her card stuck in it.”

(Our fax machine does not have a credit card reader. Now confused, I approach the patron.)

Me: “What seems to be the problem here?”

Patron: “My card is stuck in the fax machine.”

Me: “Can you show me where?”

(She points to the paper feed.)

Me: *digging the card from the machine* “How did this happen?”

Patron: “The voice said, ‘put in the card number,’ so I put the card in the machine.”

Me: “Miss, it doesn’t scan the card. It scans the pages you want to fax. You have to manually type the card number using the number keys on the pad.”

(The patron gives me a dumbfounded look.)

Me: *pointing to the numbers* “The numbers on the front of your credit card are the actual account number. That’s how the machine knows to charge your account.”

(Same dumbfounded look.)

Me: *sigh* “Here, let me help you…”

Taxing Faxing, Part 11
Taxing Faxing, Part 10
Taxing Faxing, Part 9
Taxing Faxing, Part 8
Taxing Faxing, Part 7
Taxing Faxing, Part 6
Taxing Faxing, Part 5
Taxing Faxing, Part 4
Taxing Faxing, Part 3
Taxing Faxing, Part 2
Taxing Faxing

A License To Kill Hope For Humanity

| Rochester Hills, MI, USA | At The Checkout, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(I work customer service desk at a local retail store. Sometimes I cashier when we’re busy.)

Me: “Okay, your total is [total].”

Customer: “Okay.”

(The customer starts swiping her card, but it won’t read)

Me: “Go ahead and swipe the card again. It didn’t catch it the first time.”

(The customer swipes the card again, but it still won’t read. She keeps swiping it, and on one of these swipes I catch a glimpse of the card she’s using. She is getting increasingly frustrated.)

Customer: “WHY. WON’T. THIS. SWIPE!?”

Me: *trying not to laugh* “Ma’am, take a look at your card for me, please?”

(The customer looks at her card. It’s her driver’s license.)

Customer: “Oh…”

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