Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

Deep Fried Attitude

, | AZ, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Technology

(I am working in the drive-thru during a busy breakfast rush when a snooty customer pulls up.)

Customer: *taking her food and shakes it* “How many calories is this? The girl on headset said you were going to find that for me!”

(We have the calorie count for practically every item in a program on our registers – right down to a single slice of cheese – so despite the massive line, I quickly check. For some reason, while we have the nutritional information for the breakfast sandwich as a whole, we don’t have the information on just the chicken filet, which is all she ordered.)

Me: “I’m really, sorry, but for some reason we don’t have it in our system. I know that if you go on the company website, though, they will have it under the ‘nutrition guide’ tab and—”

Customer: *disgusted* “I shouldn’t HAVE to go online. You should have it HERE!” *drives away*

Manager: *waves at receding car* “You have a nice day, too!”

Me: “If she’s that concerned about calories, maybe she shouldn’t be eating fried chicken for breakfast?”

Manager: “Seriously!”

Your Part In This Is Over

| Ottawa, ON, Canada | Technology

Me: “Morning, sir! Can I help you find anything?”

Customer: “Hi, I’m looking for a part for a lamp.”

Me: “Well, we don’t carry a lot of parts, but there’s always a possibility that I’ll have it. What is it that you’re looking for?”

Customer: *describes part*

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry but we don’t carry anything like that. Unfortunately it’s not even something I can order, since our suppliers wouldn’t carry anything like it, either. I’m not even sure where to send you for it since it’s a bit unusual. I’m sorry I couldn’t be of more help!”

Customer: Oh. Well, see, it’s…” *describes part again*

Me: “I’m sorry if I was unclear. I know what part you’re looking for, I just don’t have it.”

Customer: “Maybe you have one in the back. It looks like…” *describes part again*

Me: “I know exactly the piece you’re describing. I’m sorry, but I’m 100% sure that we don’t have it. I can show you our parts department if you like. It’s pretty limited since we don’t do our own repairs here.”

(I take the customer to the back, where they look for the part themselves.)

Customer: “I don’t see it here. It’s…” *describes part yet again*

Me: “I’m sorry; I don’t know what to tell you. You don’t see it because I don’t have it. I have never had it. I will never have it. If you do ever find a place that carries it, let me know so that I have somewhere to send people in the future. Right now, I can’t do anything for you.”

(The customer gears up to begin their description again. My manager has witnessed the whole exchange and speaks up:)

Manager: “You should go to [Big Box Chain].”

Customer: “Oh, wow, thanks!” *leaves*

Me: “I didn’t know [Big Box Chain] carried things like that! Thanks, [Manager]!”

Manager: “Oh, [Big Box Chain] won’t have it either. I just figured he could go bug them for a while.”

Refunder Blunder, Part 12

| Surrey, BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Technology

(Its ten minutes to close and I’m in the process of closing my store. A customer comes in with a store bag.)

Customer: “Hi, I bought a helicopter from you guys a few months ago. I was wondering if I could exchange it?”

Me: “Sure, what seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “My son flew it into a tree.”

Me: “All righty, I just need the receipt, and if you’ll pass me the copter I can see how much damage it’s sustained.”

Customer: “Oh, I don’t have the helicopter. It’s still in the tree. And I don’t have a receipt either, I don’t keep receipts. I brought the controller so you can see I actually bought it, and I’m not lying to you.”

Me: “Okay, the controller matches the copters we sell here, but I can’t just exchange the controller for a new box. I need the copter as well. And a receipt.”

Customer: “But I bought it here; the controller is proof!”

Me: “I don’t doubt that you bought it from here, sir, but I really do need everything that was in the box, including the helicopter, in order for me to do anything.”

Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. You’re telling me I drove two hours to merely exchange this copter for my son, and it was all in vain?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I really can’t do anything until I have the copter and a receipt.”

Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. What kind of policy is that?!”

Me: “I think you’ll find most stores exercise the same policy as we do about not having the product you’re exchanging.”

Customer: “Fine! Give me your manager’s card and I’ll be back! You haven’t heard the end of this!”

(He never came back and nothing else has come of this.)

Related:
Refunder Blunder, Part 11
Refunder Blunder, Part 10
Refunder Blunder, Part 9

Having A Loan Moan

| Houston, TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Technology

(Often we have people wanting to pick up items that have been pawned in their spouses/parents/sibling’s name. This is possible; however the original ticket is required in order to avoid theft. Occasionally, if they don’t make it in by their due date the item is pulled for sale. If this happens and they come in and want it back, they are able to buy it back and we only charge them the loan amount plus interest.)

Customer: “I want to pick up my tablet but I don’t have the ticket.”

Me: “Okay, let me get your ID and I can look that up for you.”

(After several minutes of searching using her name and her ID number separately, I am unable to find said tablet.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, it doesn’t seem to be here. Could it be under anyone else’s name? Maybe a friend or relative?”

Customer: “No. It’s definitely in my name. Just go in the back and look for it.”

Me: “Okay, ma’am. We do have a lot of tablets and I wouldn’t usually do this, but since it’s a slow day I can spare a few minutes to have a look.”

(After ten minutes of searching, I still can’t find the tablet.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I can’t find it. Are you sure it was at our store?”

Customer: “It was definitely here and it was definitely in my name. Did you sell it? It wasn’t due!”

Coworker: “Could it be in your husband’s name?”

Customer: “Yes.”

(I look under her husband’s name and sure enough, there it is. Since she doesn’t have the original ticket, she is not able to pick it up.)

Me: “Well, it looks like we found it. Unfortunately, since it isn’t in your name and you don’t have the ticket, your husband will have to come in to pick it up.”

Customer: “THIS IS RIDICULOUS. HE IS MY HUSBAND! Well, I have some other things to pick up under my name. Another tablet and an Xbox One.”

(I look up her name again to find that the tablet was pulled a full two months ago. She loaned $200. That plus the interest for the full two month loan and the two months since it was pulled would have come to $360, but since it’s been a rough day already I decide to just charge her for three months, which comes to $320.)

Me: “Here’s the Xbox, ma’am. It looks like your tablet was pulled some time ago, as your last day of grace was two months ago. You can buy it back at $320, which is your loan amount plus three months of interest.”

Customer: “No. [Manager] said she would keep it for me and it would be $240 to buy it back.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, that would be the cost if you picked it up one month into your two month loan period. There’s no way I can give it to you for that, considering it’s been four months.”

(The customer then leaves with her Xbox One. Later, she returns with her husband, carrying the Xbox One box. They pick up the tablet that was in his name and do not mention the one that was pulled. They then call my manager over.)

Customer: “I picked up this Xbox but you stole my controllers. I need you to give me new controllers.”

Manager: “I’m sorry, but it says in our system that we didn’t take in any controllers. I can call the employee who took it in to be sure though.”

(She calls the employee, who confirms that the customers took the controllers home with them.)

Manager: “I’m sorry but she did confirm that we never took in any controllers.”

Customer: “You stole my controllers! Call the police! I want my controllers!”

Manager: “If you like, we can get the footage from the cameras up. But even if we do see that you did not take the controllers with you, we won’t be able to replace them tonight. We are already closed and since we don’t have any Xbox One controllers in stock we’ll have to send someone to buy some tomorrow.”

(The customer begins shouting and screaming about wanting to play Xbox tonight. Eventually, her husband manages to convince her to leave. We did manage to find the footage, and she did take the controllers home with her. The next day, she came back in.)

Customer: “Do you have my controllers yet?”

Manager: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We were able to find the footage and you did take them with you. We won’t be able to replace your controllers as you never left them with us.”

Customer: “I CAN’T BELIEVE Y’ALL ARE TRYING TO STEAL FROM ME. YOU BETTER GET SOMEONE WITH EYES TO LOOK AT THAT VIDEO BECAUSE Y’ALL STOLE MY CONTROLLERS!”

(As she’s shouting, I hear my manager on the phone.)

Manager: “Okay, they’re sending someone to take a look.”

Customer: “Who?”

Manager: “The police.”

Customer: “OH, THAT’S HOW IT IS? YOU’RE GONNA CALL THE POLICE ON ME?”

(The customer RAN out the door, never to be seen again.)

Almost Got Physical

| Canada | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I am calling with a complaint that one of my games won’t launch.)

Me: “Hi there, I’d like to register a complaint.”

Call Center: “Of course, sir. Sorry to hear that; how may I help you?”

Me: “Yeah, it seems your service has a bug up its a** and is trying to make me buy a game TWICE!”

Call Center: “Okay, sir, I understand. Can I get your account name and number?”

(We go through the check in questions and she starts looking through my account and transactions in the marketplace.)

Call Center:“Sir, I am seeing achievements on your gamer-tag but in accounts I see no online purchase for this game. Are you certain you bought the game online?”

Me: “OF COURSE I AM! I buy all of my games digital now. What’s the point in this extra hard drive if I have to…”

(At this point I open my drawer and see the game in question’s physical copy lying right there. The realization that I just sat through nearly an hour of robots and wait times to complain that my console wouldn’t play a game without the disc in it slowly sets in.)

Me:“…Um, It would seem as though I actually did buy the disc for this one… I’m going to go ahead and find a very tall building to jump off of.”

Call Center: *chuckling* “Please don’t do that, sir, but do have a good day!”

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