Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Customer Service Is Over(reaction)
    (1,602 thumbs up)
  • August Theme Of The Month: We Are Closed!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Technology

    The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

    Laptop Flop, Part 4

    | TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Money, Technology, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I work at a computer repair center downtown. There is a crosswalk leading from our door across the street, with two parking spaces adjacent to it.)

    Me: “If there are any other problems, please feel free to call or drop by; we are more than happy to help.”

    (The customer takes his newly refurbished laptop and a brand new case from me.)

    Customer: “Thank you so much. I really appreciate this. Do you guys happen to work on smart phones?”

    Me: “Yes, we do. Just bring the phone in anytime, and we will take a look at it.”

    Customer: “It’s in my car, actually. I’ll be right back.”

    (The customer walks out the door to their car, and momentarily sets the laptop in its case down in the crosswalk while he looks for his keys. I have spent several long and frustrating hours working on the laptop, but because the customer is so kind and polite I don’t really mind. Unfortunately, a driver in a black pickup suddenly drives into the crosswalk and parks his truck on top of the laptop, damaging it.)

    Me: “Well, f***.”

    (The customer and the driver argue for a moment, before the driver comes in with the customer on his heels.)

    Customer: “Look at what he did!”

    (I quickly examine his laptop, and make an estimate on how much it will cost to repair it. Thankfully the damage isn’t too terrible.)

    Driver: “Hey! I was here first! Quit helping him and help me! I need to pick up my [smart phone]!”

    Customer #1: *to the driver* “And what exactly do you plan on doing about my laptop!”

    Driver: “Nothing! It’s your own d*** fault for leaving it in a parking spot.”

    Customer: “It cost me $275 to have it refurbished!”

    Driver: “Sorry for you! Maybe you wont be such a moron next time and put it in your car instead of leaving it in a parking space!”

    Me: *to the driver* “That will be a total of $291.57.”

    Driver: “What! Why the h*** does it cost that much? This is outrageous! You’re just trying to rip me off! Give me my phone back NOW!”

    Me: “It is $49.99 to replace the screen on your phone, and the repairs for this laptop will approximately cost $219.99. Including tax, your total comes to $291.57. Will that be cash or card?”

    Driver: “What!? I am not paying for this a**hole’s laptop. It’s his own f****** fault for leaving it in the parking space!”

    Me: “So, let me get this straight: you park in the clearly marked crosswalk, which is a no-parking zone. You whip into the space and nearly hit him because you weren’t paying attention to where you were going, and run over his laptop. The same laptop I have spent the last two days working on, which was sitting in, again, a clearly marked no-parking zone, and you’re not going to take responsibility for your actions?”

    Driver: “Exactly! I am not paying for this little s***’s stupidity.”

    Me: *to the customer* “It looks like your repairs will be on me.”

    Customer: “Thank you, but you don’t have to do that.”

    Driver: “Yeah, you have to pay for it because you’re a dumba** that left his computer in a parking space.” *turns to me* “Now give me my d*** phone.”

    Me: “Get out.”

    Driver: “No, I want my phone. Now hand it over.”

    Me: “No. Either you pay for all of it, or you get nothing.”

    Driver: “I’ll sue!”

    Me: *pointing* “There are a total of one, two, three security cameras that have caught everything on tape. Do you really think you could justify refusing to pay damages in front of a judge?”

    (The driver looks crestfallen, and finally pays for all of it. The customer gives me a $20 tip!)

    Related:
    Laptop Flop, Part 3
    Laptop Flop, Part 2
    Laptop Flop

    Stuck In A Vicious Triangle

    | Dusseldorf, Germany | Bizarre, Extra Stupid, Technology, Theme Of The Month

    (I work as IT support for a law firm. Usually I am very understanding when someone asks me a question with an obvious answer, since most lawyers don’t know PCs very well.)

    Lawyer: “HELP! My PC is going crazy! Triangles EVERYWHERE!”

    Me: “Triangles? What kind of triangles? Do you mean error messages with a warning sign?”

    Lawyer: “No, triangles! And a lot of them! I can’t finish my email. Please help me!”

    Me: “One moment please, I will connect to your PC to see what’s going on.”

    (I start the software and connect to his PC, and see Outlook doing ‘^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^’ without pause.)

    Me: “Mr. [Name], is it possible that something is lying on the keyboard?”

    Lawyer: *silence*

    Me: “Maybe on the upper left corner?”

    (At this moment, the ‘triangles’ stop.)

    Lawyer: “I guess it wasn’t a good idea to place the book on the keyboard. Please wait a second.”

    (He deletes the symbols and tries to write a normal sentence. Without the book pressing a different button, it obviously works.)

    Lawyer: “I think I could have figured that out myself. Usually I’m very good with the computer. Thank you. Bye.”

    (The lawyer hangs up and my coworker turns to me.)

    Coworker: “Hey, Mr. [Name] again? How many times did he call us this week?”

    Me: “I had him eight times on the line. I don’t know about the others.”

    Your Scamming Days Are Numbered

    | VA, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Liars & Scammers, Technology

    (I’m working in a cell phone customer service call center. We can see the number the customers are calling from.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]; this is [Name]. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “I’d like to report a phone that was stolen.”

    Me: “I’m sorry to hear that. What’s the number?”

    (The customer gives me the exact same number of the phone the customer is calling from.)

    Me: “Uh, sir. That’s the number that you are on.”

    Customer: “S***!” *hangs up*

    Damaging Their Reliability

    | London, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Liars & Scammers, Technology, Tourists/Travel

    (I am called for technical support to a customer’s house, since their wireless internet is not working.)

    Customer: “So, my son got this wireless router but it doesn’t work, and I can’t connect to the internet anymore either.”

    (I look at the modem to find that it has been completely unplugged. Instead, they have a wireless router without a power supply, and an ethernet line leading to the PC, but it’s not wired into anything else.)

    Me: “Well, here is your problem; you have unplugged your modem and your new router won’t work unless it’s plugged into the modem, which you still have. I would be happy to wire the system back up for you if you have the old power supply available.”

    Customer: “Well, I threw it out because my son said we didn’t need it.”

    Me: “Er, right. You are aware that the modem and power supply are not your property? They are leased to you with your internet connection. I have a spare one, but it comes with a part cost and I will need to charge you for the loss of the old one.”

    Customer: “I see what’s happening here; you’re trying to scam me out of money. I don’t want it.”

    Me: “I can’t restore your connection without replacing the part. If it was broken or faulty, I would be able to do it for free, but since you just told me you threw it out, I have to charge you for it.”

    Customer: “You won’t charge if it’s broken, right?”

    Me: “Yes…”

    Customer: “If the modem is broken, you can give me a new one right?”

    (I think I see where this is going…)

    Me: “Yes, if the modem is broken, I can give you an updated unit with a new power supply, but since your old unit does not appear to be faulty, I can’t replace it.”

    Customer: “Okay, can you test it and see if it’s faulty?”

    (I figured at this point that there is no harm, and that if it was showing fault I could replace it for free.)

    Me: “Okay, let me just go and get the power supply from my van.”

    (As I’m halfway out the door, I hear a massive bang, and the sounds of stamping. I head back upstairs to see the modem now on the floor, and the customer’s foot planted firmly on top.)

    Customer: “It’s broken, so get me a new one.”

    Me: “I just saw you destroy it.”

    Customer: “I’ll pay you £30 to say you didn’t see anything.”

    Me: “But it would have cost you £8 for a new power supply.”

    Customer: “It’s not the amount; it’s the principle!”

    (I eventually replaced the whole unit for a cost of £15 and left. Next month I heard the customer called back. The next technician that went there said that the customer’s son had come by and told his mother she didn’t need the modem, then unplugged it and threw it away. The company, after reading both our reports, decided to cancel the contract then and there.)

    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 6

    | Carlisle, England, UK | Family & Kids, Geeks Rule, Technology, Top, Underaged

    (I am 21 years old, and a huge ‘Pokémon’ fan. I notice that my receipt for the new Pokémon game is wrong, so I go in to check what happened. At the counter next to me is a middle aged woman buying ‘Grand Theft Auto 5′ for her young son, who is no older than nine. The game is intended for 18-year-olds minimum.)

    Me: “Excuse me; the deposit for the new Pokémon is £5, but I’ve been charged twice for it.”

    Employee: “Oh, sorry, let me have a look.”

    (I hand him the receipt, while the woman stares at me.)

    Woman: “You’re a little old to be playing Pokémon aren’t you?”

    Me: “And your son’s a little young to be playing Grand Theft Auto isn’t he?”

    (The employees can’t help but laugh. The woman goes red faced.)

    Woman: “That’s completely different.”

    Me: “Yeah, I’m getting a game intended for kids and your kid is getting a game intended for adults.”

    Woman: “Well he knows full well not to repeat anything they do in those games; he is a smart boy. Who do you think you are to judge me anyway?”

    Me: “Lady… as far as I’m concerned, if my game purchases are your business then your game purchases are my business.”

    Woman: “Well I just hope my boy is smart enough to know when it is time to grow up.”

    Boy: “Yeah, f*** you!”

    (The employees and I burst out laughing as the mother throws the game onto the counter and drags her son out of the shop with him screaming at her that he wants his ‘f****** game.’)

    Related:
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 5
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 4
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 3
    Grand Theft Innocence, Part 2
    Grand Theft Innocence


    Page 38/126First...3637383940...Last