Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Filled With Creamy Justice
    (1,940 thumbs up)
  • July Theme Of The Month: Animal Madness!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Technology

    The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

    It Would Explain Canada’s Lack Of Sun

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Canada, Technology, Tourists/Travel

    (I have just activated a new smart-phone for a customer. I am showing them how to set it up.)

    Me: “…and that is how you would send a text message. Do you have any other questions?”

    Customer: “The time is wrong on this phone.”

    Me: “That’s because you haven’t selected the correct time zone. Here, I will show you the time setup.”

    (I show the customer the list of time zones, and briefly leave her to answer another customer’s question.)

    Customer: *impatiently* “Excuse me! Excuse me! This phone you have given me is broken!”

    Me: “Broken? Why do you say that?”

    Customer: “There is no ‘Canadian’ time zone! It keeps trying to put it on ‘Eastern’!”

    Me: “Yes, that would be correct, it’s seven o’clock here.”

    Customer: *indignantly* “We don’t live in the east! This is Canada!”

    PEBCAK, Episode IV

    | Connecticut, USA | Technology

    (The head of a department wants her word processor upgraded to the latest version.)

    Manager: *on phone* “Okay, I’ll send Jeff over to upgrade you. Please back up all your documents, because he’s going to delete the existing version and install the new one.”

    (I go to her office.)

    Me: “Hi, I’m here to upgrade [word processor] for you. Have you backed up your documents?”

    Customer: “Of course I have.”

    Me: “Great!”

    (I wipe out the existing directory and install the new version. A few minutes before I get back to the faculty computing center, the phone rings.)

    Customer: on phone “Where are all my letters and papers? They’re all gone!”

    Manager: “Jeff says you backed up your documents.”

    Customer: “Well, I didn’t know what you guys meant by that. I didn’t want to look stupid, so I said yes.”

    Related:
    PEBCAK, Episode III
    PEBCAK, Episode II
    Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard

    When A Firewall Just Doesn’t Cut The Mustard

    | Norway | Technology

    Me: “Can you check the cable from the wall to your router?”

    Customer: “What cable?”

    Me: “The DSL cable. The one that goes from the phone-outlet in the wall, to the router.”

    Customer: “That ‘wall’ you are talking about…is that something you installed for me?”

    Computers Increase The Chance Of Identity Theft

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Liars & Scammers, Technology, Top

    (A customer is requesting a refund on a computer.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I cannot give you a refund on your computer.”

    Customer: “What?! Why the not?!”

    Me: “You don’t have a receipt. It’s two years old, and long out of warranty.”

    Customer: “I’ll have you know, I’m a lawyer and I could sue you for everything you’ve got!”

    Me: “We only have a 30 day refund policy. I’m sorry.”

    Customer: “I’m an assistant attorney general, and I will have you reported! This is an outrage!”

    Me: “Okay, sir. Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

    Customer: “Don’t you take that tone with me! I’m a board member of this chain, and you need to serve me!”

    Me: “If there is nothing else, I’m going to have to ask you to remove your device and leave.”

    Customer: “You can’t tell me to leave! I’m the owner’s nephew!”

    Me: “Please calm down and leave.”

    Customer: “Do you have any idea who I am?!”

    Me: “Do you?”

    Tech Support Is Rendered Fruitless

    | Minnesota, USA | Technology

    Customer: “My computer has fruit in it!”

    Me: “Like what?”

    Customer: “Every time I turn my computer on, it has a fruit in it.”

    Me: “You mean an apple?”

    Customer: “Yeah, I guess.”

    Me: “That means you have that brand of computer. Do you need anything else, ma’am?”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t really like apples. Can I get a cantaloupe on it instead?”


    Page 108/122First...106107108109110...Last