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  • September Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    Category: School

    No Masters Over Me

    , | UK | Bad Behavior, School

    (Several young men come in and begin playing on the demonstration consoles. After a short period they begin acting very inappropriately: shouting, vulgar language, etc.  I approach the group.)

    Me: “Excuse me, but I have to ask that you calm down or I am going to have to ask you to leave.”

    Customer #1: “Whatever.”

    Group: *sniggers*

    Me: “As I said, ‘sir,’ you need to keep your voices down and your language appropriate, or I am going to have to ask you to go.”

    Customer #1: “You can’t talk to me like that. I want to speak to your manager.”

    Me: “I’m afraid she is unavailable. If you’d like I can call security and you can speak to them.”

    Customer #1: *angry* “I’m not going to be talked down to by someone that works in a shop; you need to learn your place!”

    (At this my manager had come over and, obviously seeing my anger, told me to go calm down. When I returned, the lads had gone and I went on with my day and forgot all about the incident. Several weeks later, as part of my Master’s, I was working at the university setting up for an undergraduate laboratory assessment, which I was assisting the lecturer in demonstrating. In came the undergrads, and lo and behold there was my stuck up customer sitting at the bench which I am in charge of. We exchanged a glance and at the professor’s words ‘the demonstrators will be marking you on your practical skills during the course of this assessment, which accounts for 20% of your practical marks,’ his expression changed, and this time, the entitled brat did not look as confident.)

    Affording A New Degree Of Understanding

    , | Scranton, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, School

    (I’m in my mid 20s, and have been the general manager of a dollar store for about three years. One afternoon, I took over the register to allow my associate a 15 minute break. My first customer gives me a look of pity.)

    Customer: “Bet you wish you went to college.”

    (This is not an out of the ordinary remark, so I smile as I respond.)

    Me: “I did! Had a lot of fun, too!”

    Customer: “Oh. Well, I bet you wish you graduated.”

    Me: “…I did.”

    (The customer is starting to get a little snotty at this point.)

    Customer: “Bet you wish you had graduated with a real degree, then.”

    (I’m getting angry at this point, because he is very obviously trying to make me feel bad about a job I love.)

    Me: “Sir, I graduated from [State College], with honors, with a Bachelor’s degree in forensic chemistry.”

    Customer: *shocked* “But why would you work HERE?!”

    Me: “Because, for some reason, I like it. But then people like you come in. Will that be all for you today?”

    (The customer, face red, quickly paid for his items, and left. I haven’t seen him since!)

    It’s The Principle Of The Matter

    | USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, School

    (I am second in line, and it’s early morning on a Thursday. The area has just gotten a severe weather warning about freezing rain and hail. In front of me is a chipper customer chatting with the clerk as she pays for her 40-oz bottles of malt liquor.)

    Customer: “I got four of these. Does the two for five bucks still apply?”

    Clerk: “Sure does. You got the day off, do you?”

    Customer: “Yep, I work for the school district, and school’s been cancelled! I’m gonna get shit-faced before noon!”

    Clerk: *slightly shocked* “Okay, well, that’s $10.20. Have fun.”

    Customer: “Oh, don’t worry. I’m not teaching your kids. I’m the principal!”

    Making False Bald Statements

    | KS, USA | Pets & Animals, School

    (I am currently working in the birds of prey section when a group of students and a few chaperones walk in.)

    Chaperone #1: *points at golden eagle* “Look kids! It’s the state bird of America.”

    Me: “Ma’am, that’s actually a golden eagle. The bald eagle is the national bird.”

    Chaperone #1: “I went to school for four years. I think I know what the state bird of America is!”

    Me: “I’m not questioning your intelligence, ma’am, but America does not have a ‘state bird.’ It’s national symbol is, in fact, the bald eagle. If you look at the sign in front of the exhibit you will see that this is a golden eagle.”

    Chaperone #1: “That’s a f****** bald eagle! I’m a history teacher! I know my s***!”

    Chaperone #2: “Michelle, you are not a teacher! You are merely a chaperone. If you continue to act like this you will never be a chaperone again.”

    Chaperone #1: *dumbfounded*

    Student: “You tell her, Mrs. [Chaperone #2]!”

    Incorrectly Prospecting Your Lack Of Prospects

    , | London, England, UK | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, School

    (I work in a fast food restaurant to earn some extra money while at university; I work at a branch quite far from my university in a popular shopping area so no one in my class knows. Most of the other people in my class are fairly well off and I don’t really fit in. I have colourful hair and three facial piercings. One day a girl from my class comes in with her mother and she notices me but doesn’t say anything as the mother steers her towards my station.)

    Mother: “I’ve told you time and time again that you have to stay in education. You can’t just quit university because you’d rather spend time with your boyfriend.”

    Me: “May I take your order?”

    (The mother places order for them both and as I walk to fill the drinks I hear her say to her daughter.)

    Mother: “If you drop out of university you’ll end up like that girl there, all filth and metal with no career or future prospects.”

    Girl: “Actually, mum, she’s in my class and she works harder than most of us. She helps us all with our work if we get stuck and is really nice.”

    (The mum was stunned into silence and I pretended not to have heard as I gave them their meal. The next day the girl asked if I wanted to go to a party with her!)

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