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    Category: Religion

    There’s nothing worse than a stupid customer than a stupid customer with a cause. If these people had a maker he would likely have filed them under ‘rejects’.

    Store Of The D***ed

    | Atlanta, GA, USA | Religion

    Me: “Hi, how can help you today?”

    Customer: “Are you a lesbian!?”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    Customer: “You’ve got real short hair. I heard that women with short hair are lesbians.”

    Me: “So, was there anything I could help you with?”

    Customer: “You can answer my question! Are you a lesbian or not?!”

    Me: “Sir, I don’t feel it’s appropriate for me to answer that.”

    Customer: “I don’t want some hell-bound homosexual near me! God will strike you down for disobeying his word!”

    Me: “Okay, okay. If you really must know, no I am not a lesbian.”

    Customer: “Then why do you have short hair??”

    (By this time, my manager, who is male-to-female transgender, walks over.)

    Manager: *in their manly voice* “Is there a problem here, sir?”

    Customer: “Oh dear lord! You’re not a woman!”

    Manager: “Only on paper, sir.

    Customer: *runs out screaming* “This place is d***ed! D***ed I tell you!”

    Short Cake, Tall Order

    | Southlake, TX, USA | Food & Drink, Religion, Top

    Customer: “Excuse me?”

    Me: “Good afternoon, ma’am. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I’d like a cake made. Can you make a cake in about 20 minutes?”

    Me: “Unfortunately, we have no available decorators at this time. I can certainly take an order for tomorrow morning, however.”

    Customer: “No! That’s unacceptable! I refuse to be treated differently just because I’m Jewish!”

    Me: “I’m also a Jew, but the issue is that I don’t have the proper training to make a cake for you at this time. I can place an order for you, but can do little more than that.”

    Customer: “No, forget it. I refuse to be discriminated like this! I’m leaving!”

    Me: “Have a nice day, and happy Hanukkah!”

    Customer: “What the h*** is Hanukkah?!”

    May Contain Traces Of Messiah

    | Davie, FL, USA | Food & Drink, Religion

    Me: “Welcome to [Smoothie Store]! How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “Good morning to you! I need the large blueberry please.”

    Me: “Alright sir, Ill get those started for you. What kind of free boost would you like in your smoothies?”

    Customer: “You know what my favorite and the best boost of all is?”

    Me: “No sir, I don’t. I’m sorry.”

    Customer: “Jesus.”

    Me: “Oh, haha. You would like a Jesus boost?”

    Customer: “Why yes, I like to boost my day with Jesus everyday! mAre you filled with the light, have you accepted Christ into your life?”

    Me: “Yes sir, I have. So what boost would you like in your smoothie?”

    Customer: “I told you already.”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir, looks like were fresh out of Jesus today.”

    Customer: “Oh that’s too bad. I’ll just have the whey protein, then.”

    Sins Of The Father, Part 2

    | Kalamazoo, MI, USA | Family & Kids, Religion, Technology

    (My dad builds websites from home, but when’s he’s out I answer his office phone and take notes for him. I am a 20 year old female, and my father is a 55 year old male.)

    Me: “Hello, this is [my father]‘s office, how may I help you”

    Customer: “Hello, I need to ask you a question about this design template.”

    Me: “I’m sorry. My dad isn’t in right now but I can take a message.”

    Customer: “Oh, good heavens! You know, you sound exactly like your father.”

    Me: “Okay?”

    Customer: “Are you Christian?”

    Me: “No, ma’am.”

    Customer: “Well that must be it then. All you heathens sound the same to me. Well, I’ll call back.” *hangs up*

    Related:
    Sins Of The Father

    Twilight Vs Holy Light

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Books & Reading, Movies & TV, Religion, Top

    (A young woman, about 20 years old, comes up to the counter holding a copy of The Bible.)

    Me: “Hi, did you find everything you needed today?”

    Customer: “Yeah, hey, can you tell me what this is about?”

    Me: “The Bible?”

    Customer: “Yeah, what’s it about?”

    Me: “The Bible has two parts, the Old Testament which is scriptures and the New Testament, which contains the story of Jesus’ life and works as told through the gospels, written by Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.”

    Customer: “Huh. Is it any good?”

    Me: “It’s pretty popular.”

    Customer: “Nah, I’ll just get this one instead.” *puts a copy of Twilight on the counter*


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