November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Musical Mayhem

Music Stores, Concerts, Orchestra’s, none are safe from the stupidity of our very wrong customers, examples such as those searching for live recordings of Beethoven himself, to others who believe listening to Taylor Swift means you’re musically talented.

A Tinny Tiny Problem With Her Hearing

| IL, USA | Bizarre, Musical Mayhem, Technology

(Customers are packed in a tight aisle, so to get out of the way my brother and I go to the end of the aisle and stand there. We are in front of the coffee creamer and are talking about mp3 players. Suddenly, an old lady appears.)

Old Lady: *in a loud, almost yelling, voice* “You’re in front of what I need!”

(My brother and I move away and continue our conversation. The old lady takes literally five minutes to choose her creamer and just as she’s about to walk away…)

Me: *directed towards my brother* “Yeah, but your mp3 player sounds so tinny.”

Old Lady:  “What did you say?!”

Me: “Uhm… a certain type of mp3 player sounds tinny?”

Old Lady: *getting mad* “What did you say to me!?”

Me: *louder* “This mp3 player sound tinny!”

Old Lady: *really mad* “What! Are you serious?! Tell me again, what did you say to me!?”

Me: *pretty loud* “My brother’s mp3 player sounds bad!”

(There’s silence for a moment, then the old lady walks away without saying a thing.)

Brother: “Her hearing must be tinny.”

Her Relaxing Is Taxing

| Allentown, PA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Musical Mayhem

(I work in a fair trade store. Like most stores, we play music over speakers throughout the day.)

Customer: “It’s too loud!”

Manager: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Your music! It’s too loud!”

Manager: “No one else seems to think so; it’s certainly not as loud as they play in several of the other stores here. I’m friends with the manager at [Makeup Store] and their music is much louder.”

Customer: “That’s different! You’re not a REAL store!”

Manager: “…What?”

Customer: “You’re not a retail store! You’re fair trade! You’re a non-profit! You shouldn’t be acting like a real store!”

Manager: “Ma’am, we are a retail store. Our company is non-profit, that’s true, but retail stores is how we fulfill our mission.”

Customer: “You’re different! I come in here to relax, and I don’t expect it to be like other stores!”

Manager: “I’m sorry you feel that way. Is there something special I can help you find today?”

Customer: “What? No! I never spend money in here. I just walk around to relax!”

Hold That Note

| Norway | Musical Mayhem

(The computers at work are very slow, and while on the phone with a customer, this happens:)

Caller: *asking for information about her dog*

Me: “I can look it up for you on the computer, but it will take a little while, because our system is a bit slow.”

Me: *humming on a song while typing*

Caller: “Wow, you make your own hold music.”

Fought The Customer With Expert Timing

| Omaha, NE, USA | Language & Words, Musical Mayhem

(I work in a medical clinic and I have a little fun with a patient one day when she complains her kids keep “kung fu-ing” her front door.)

Patient: “They just kept kung fu-ing the door and I kept telling them to stop.”

Me: “Oh, so, everybody was kung fu fighting?”

Patient: “Yes, and I told them to just swing at the air, not hit the door.”

Me: “Were they fast as lightning?”

Patient: “No, and it was scary, I thought they were gonna wreck my door.”

Me: “I bet it was a little bit frightening.”

Patient:“Yes, I thought they were gonna wreck my door!”

Me:“Hey, [Patient], c’mon, I just gave the first part of the song. Don’t leave me hangin’ here”.

Patient: “I know, but I don’t know the rest of the song!”

This Call Is Temporarily Frozen

| USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Musical Mayhem

(I work in a call center for a large wireless company.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Wireless Company]. My name is [My Name]. May I have your name, please?”

Customer: “Anna Arendelle.”

Me: “And the phone number please?”

Customer: “Can I ask you a question?”

Me: “Sure!”

Customer: *singing* “Do you want to build a snowman? Or ride our bikes around the halls?”

Me: *starts laughing* “I think someone’s talking to pictures on the walls…”

Customer: “It gets a little lonely, all these empty rooms, watching the hours tick by. Tick tock! BYE BYE!” *click*

(I was laughing so hard I had to take a break.)

Page 1/2212345...Last