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  • November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

    Category: Movies & TV

    Dora Hasn’t Explored That Yet

    | FL, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Movies & TV, Rude & Risque

    (I’m bagging a customer’s purchases when a woman and a little girl in a Dora the Explorer shirt walk by.)

    Me: “Do you know how Dora the Explorer got her name?”

    Customer: *suddenly horrified* “Uh… no…”

    Me: “Because the Spanish word for ‘explorer’ is ‘exploradora.'”

    Customer: “Oh, thank God. I thought you were going to say she was named after a porn star or something.”

    Me: “…”

    Not Quite The Threat Of A Lifetime

    | VA, USA | Crazy Requests, Movies & TV

    (I’m a bouncer at a sports bar. Since we’re a franchise, we are only allowed to play certain channels on our TVs [mostly sports channels]. A woman calls me over to her table.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, young man, but can you change the channel on this TV to Lifetime?”

    (The television she is referring to is one of the largest ones we own, and there is a college basketball game playing.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we’re only allowed to display certain channels, and Lifetime isn’t one of them.”

    Customer: “Why not? Other restaurants can play any channel they want to.”

    Me: “This is a sports bar; we only play sports channels specifically for that reason.”

    Customer: “So you CAN’T change the channel or you WON’T?”

    (I am silent, almost dumbfounded by her ignorance of the situation.)

    Customer: “Yep, that’s what I thought. I’m not speaking another word to you. Get me the manager.”

    (The manager comes over and offers her a compromise: he will move her to a different table near one of our smaller television sets, where he was willing to make an exception and play Lifetime just for her.)

    Customer: “No! I want to watch it on the big TV!”

    Manager: “Ma’am, we simply can’t do that. This is a sports bar and we have other customers wanting to watch the game.”

    Customer: “Well, then make THEM watch it on the smaller screen!”

    Manager: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but there’s nothing else I can do for you. You can watch your program on the TV over there or not watch it at all.”

    (She rudely picks up her drink and storms over to the table near the smaller TV. After her program finishes she begins to leave (after leaving no tip) and makes a point to come up to me:)

    Customer: “Tell your manager that I will not be returning, and I will also be writing a horrible review on Yelp!”

    Me: “Oh, no! People will find out we don’t play Lifetime at a sports bar! We’re going to lose so much business…”

    Channeling Through Some Good

    | USA | Money, Movies & TV

    (I work in a call center for paid TV service. They’ve recently lost a major broadcasting contract over the price for some VERY popular channels. Said channel viewers are known for being… let’s say fanatical.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Provider]. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “What’s happened to [Channel]?”

    (I explain the expiring contract, reasons behind it, and how we are trying to resolve it. Then I brace for the outrage I am getting all too used to.)

    Customer: “Why they being so mean to you guys?”

    Me: *dumbstruck over this response* “I… uh. don’t know but I guess everyone wants more sometimes.”

    Customer: “They’re just being greedy! I’ll wait this out; don’t let them get what they want!”

    Me: “Uhh… well, I guess I’ll report that as feedback.”

    (This was hands down the most polite person on this issue I have talked to so far. This call single-handedly made every other call that day seem much better!)

    At Last You’ve Seen The Light

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Awesome Customers, Movies & TV, Musical Mayhem

    (I work in a pawn shop, and one day, a punk girl in her 20s with piercings and a mohawk comes in to the store with her boyfriend. On this day, I’ve chosen Disney’s Tangled to play on the display TVs.)

    Punk Girl: *sees what I have playing on the TVs* “Oh, my god, is that Tangled? I love this movie!”

    Me: “Would you like to buy a copy? Almost every time I play it in here, I sell at least one.”

    Punk Girl: *stops singing along for a moment* “No, thanks. I already own it. And the soundtrack.”

    (She walked away singing along and dancing, making my day. I took this as proof that things are sometimes the complete opposite of what they appear to be.)

    She Has A Dream Of Video Piracy

    | Knoxville, TN, USA | Crazy Requests, Movies & TV

    (I am working the phone at a well-known retail chain when what sounds like an elderly female customer calls.)

    Me: “Thank you for choosing [Store]. How may I direct your call?”

    Customer: “Hello, dear, I’m not sure who I need to talk to. I was hoping you might have that new Martin Luther King movie in.”

    (At this point, the customer starts rambling, which is a fairly regular occurrence. Thinking she’s asking about a documentary, I’m waiting for her to take a breather so that I can transfer to electronics so they can check for the film. Just as I get an opportunity, I register something she’s said.)

    Me: “Ma’am, did you just say that Oprah is in it?”

    Customer: “That’s right. Oprah Winfrey and Cuba Gooding, Jr. I’m not sure who else.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I just realized I know what movie you’re talking about; I saw the trailer a couple of days ago. I’m afraid it won’t be out in theaters until January.”

    Customer: “Oh, I know. It’s just that I don’t really like going to the theater. It’s so expensive and smells weird and people can be so rude. That’s why I was hoping to get the DVD.”

    Me: “Ah, sorry, ma’am, but the DVD version won’t be released until at least a few months after the movie opens in theaters, so I know for a fact that we don’t have that DVD in yet.”

    Customer: “Oh, really? That’s too bad… Do you think you might get it by Christmas?”