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    Category: Movies & TV

    Missed The Magic Of The Magic Kingdom

    | Fayetteville, NC, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Movies & TV, Religion

    (A customer comes up to the till and hands me a bunch of DVDs. We have to up-sell, for obvious reasons.)

    Me: “I see you are getting a bunch of Disney movies. Did you know the newest Harry Potter just came out? We do have some copies on the shelf.”

    Customer: “I’m not even going to touch that anti-Christ movie! Any movie that delves into magic is Satan’s movies!”

    (I look down at the movies being rented and finish the transaction with no more chit-chatting.)

    Me: “Enjoy The Little Mermaid, and Beauty and the Beast! Have a nice day!”

    Didn’t Do Math At Hogwarts

    | Charlotte, NC, USA | Books & Reading, Extra Stupid, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV

    (A customer is renting ‘Harry Potter: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2.’)

    Customer: “Have you watched this?”

    Me: “Yes, but I found the books to be much better.”

    Customer: “How can you like the work of some lazy author?”

    Me: “Huh?”

    Customer: “There are eight movies, but only seven books. The author got lazy and wrapped everything up in seven books instead of writing eight!”

    Causing A Drama In The Drama Section

    | New York, NY, USA | Bizarre, Movies & TV

    (I work in a video rental store where new movies are put in the ‘premiere’ section for a few months before getting moved to ‘comedy,’ ‘mystery,’ etc. Even though ‘premiere’ movies had come out in the theatres about six months to a year prior to coming out for rental, people always seemed to make it a priority to pick movies from there.)

    Customer: “Where is [Movie]? I don’t see it here.”

    Me: “It was just taken from the premiere section about 30 minutes ago and put into the drama section.”

    Customer; “Oh, no! I wanted to watch that.”

    Me: “I just came from the drama section, just over there about 12 feet away, and I saw 10 copies of the film sitting there. I’m sure that there will be plenty there if you go now.”

    Customer: “Oh, I never watch a movie unless it’s in the premiere section.”

    (She turns to leave the store, sighs heavily, and sends her heartfelt complaint out to the store in general.)

    Customer: “And I REALLY wanted to see that movie!”

    Not A Sound Argument

    | Exeter, England, UK | Bizarre, Movies & TV, Technology, Theme Of The Month

    (I’m working on retail in the cinema. It’s quiet because all the films have started. A lady comes down from a screen.)

    Me: “Hello. Can I help?”

    Customer: “Yes. My daughter and I are watching a film in screen one, and the sound is AWFUL! You can hardly hear anything. It’s terrible! Can’t you get it fixed? I’ve had my hearing tested by professionals and I’ve got the hearing of a 14-year-old, so I know I’m not just imagining it. Get it fixed. It’s ruining our film. My daughter’s been looking forward to seeing it for ages, and it’s ruined!”

    (When she finally leaves, I radio the technician to check it out. Afterwards, he comes to the counter.)

    Technician: “You know the problem in screen one?”

    Me: “Yeah, what exactly was the problem?”

    Technician: “Nothing. There’s nothing wrong with it. I didn’t do anything to fix it, because it’s fine. She must be nuts.”

    (After the film, the customer approaches me at the counter again.)

    Customer: “Thank you SO much for getting that problem checked out. It was SO much better afterwards!”

    Not Quite On The Money

    | NY, USA | Movies & TV, Theme Of The Month

    (The grocery store I work at also sells DVDs for a pretty cheap price. A customer comes up to me, irate.)

    Me: “Hi. Can I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes! I need to return this movie!”

    Me: “Well, I’m not sure we’ll be able to refund you, since it’s been opened. Was the disc scratched or something?”

    Customer: “No! The movie was terrible! I can’t believe you would sell me such a horrible movie!”

    Me: “Sir, I’m sorry to hear you didn’t like the movie, but we can’t refund you just because you didn’t like it.”

    Customer: “Yes, you can! You’ve seen the movie; you know how bad it is! I demand a refund!”

    Me: “Sir, I’ve never seen this movie.”

    Customer: “Yes, you have!”

    Me: *confused, and 100 percent sure I’ve never seen it* “I’m sorry, but I’ve never seen this movie. I’m not a fan of this genre.”

    Customer: “YES. YOU. HAVE. You can’t sell movies you haven’t seen, without knowing if they’re any good. It’s the law!”

    (At this point my manager has heard the yelling and comes over.)

    Manager: “Can I help you, sir?”

    Customer: “Yes. This movie was terrible and this girl sold it to me knowing it would be bad, and now she’s claiming she never saw it. You should fire her.”

    Manager: “I’m very sorry for the inconvenience, sir. We can refund you this time, but in the future, please be aware that you buy movies at your own risk.”

    Customer: “Good. You should take more care hiring your employees. SOME of them like to break the law!”

    (She refunds the movie, and hands the man the $3 he paid for it.)

    Customer: “What’s this?”

    Manager: “It’s your refund.”

    Customer: “No way! I paid way more than this. I paid $20!”

    (It clearly says ‘$3 movies!’ on the rack behind him, which I point out.)

    Customer: “This is bulls***! I demand my full refund! Look, it even says $20 here on my receipt!”

    (I take the receipt, find the movie listed, and point out that it clearly says $3. The customer continues trying to argue his case and my manager takes over again.)

    Manager: “Okay, sir. I see the problem here. May I have that money back?”

    (She proceeds to count the money back into the drawer, and then count it back out again, so it still adds up to $3. Then she hands it back to the customer.)

    Manager: “Here you go, sir. I’m very sorry about that. I’ll be sure to have a talk with [My Name] about counting out money correctly. Have a nice day.”

    Customer: “Thank you! It’s about time someone knew what they were doing!”

    (The customer stalks off, mumbling about how incompetent I am, without noticing that he still only had $3. My manager and I had a pretty good laugh once he was gone!)


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