Featured Story:
  • Always Time For A Rhyme
    (2,204 thumbs up)
  • Category: Movies & TV

    Not A Regular Response

    | TX, USA | Health & Body, Movies & TV

    (I’m at the ticket booth ordering my ticket for the movie. I happen to be 57 years old.)

    Me: “One for [Movie], please.”

    Ticketer: “Senior or regular?”

    Me: “Uh, ummm… uh… regular.”

    Ticketer: “Seven dollars, please.”

    Me: “You know, when you ask a senior if he’s regular that has a different meaning. I may be a senior but I’m regular.”

    Ticketer: *smiles*

    My Little-Minded Brony

    | UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV

    (It’s my day off so I go to the toy shop where I work with my eight-year-old niece. She’s a huge fan of ‘My Little Pony,’ so we’re off looking at toys. Two men are already there, talking about the show. My niece is pretty social, so she tries to strike up a conversation while I eye the display.)

    Niece: “Ooh, you like My Little Pony, too?! Who’s your favourite? I love Fluttershy; she’s so pretty and kind. That’s how I want to be when I grow up.”

    Man #1: “You’re a fan, huh? I guess you’ve got all the merchandise then?”

    Niece: “Merch… an… dise?”

    Man #2: “The toys and stuff. Don’t you have any?”

    Niece: “Oh… yeah! I got some for my birthday!”

    Man #1: “So you probably know the names of all the main characters, then?”

    Niece: *lists characters*

    Man #2: “What about the episode names?”

    Niece: “Um…”

    Man #1: “Don’t you know them?”

    (I’m starting to get quite annoyed.)

    Me: “What are you doing?”

    (They both give me defensive looks.)

    Man #1: “Nothing!”

    Man #2: “We just wanted to know if she’s a real fan or one of those fake geek girls.”

    Man #1: “She can’t even name the episodes.”

    Man #2: “Bet she hasn’t even watched them all.”

    (My niece is starting to get upset, so I lose all patience.)

    Me:” Are you serious? All it takes to be a fan is for someone to like and enjoy something. Where do you get off acting so smug because you know more about a show for little girls than its intended audience?”

    Man #1: “Are you saying men can’t like stuff for girls? That’s sexist!”

    Me: “Sexist?! I’m not the one spewing misogynistic nonsense at a child simply because they can’t pass some pointless memory test. You obviously haven’t learned much, since the TV show is all about friendship and treating people with respect! Now, shove off or grow up!”

    (They storm off. I turn round to see my manager watching me.)

    Me: “Am I fired?”

    Manager: “You’re not in uniform; they don’t know you work here. Besides, if someone talked to my kids like that, I’d knock them out.”

    (My niece cheered up after a while, and I bought her some new ‘merchandise’. I hope those men went home and watched the show again, and maybe took its message to heart this time.)

    In Good Companion Company

    | Robeline, LA, USA | Family & Kids, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV

    (I have two piercings in each ear and am wearing some very geeky earrings. Customers keep commenting on one pair, Nintendo controllers, but are confused as to what the other pair is. Until a young girl, who is maybe six, comes in with her mom.)

    Little Girl: *wide eyed* “Is that a Tardis!?”

    Me: *smiling* “Yes, it is! No one has figured it out all day.”

    Little Girl: *excitedly* “Does that mean you’re the Doctor?!” *to her mom* “Is the Doctor a girl now?!”

    Mom: *sternly* “No, the Doctor isn’t a girl.”

    Little Girl: *sadly* “Oh…”

    Mom: *brightly* “But that just means she’s his companion!”

    Little Girl: “OH!” *grins* “Yeah! The Doctor does like gingers, doesn’t he?”

    Me: *putting a finger to my lips* “Shh! Don’t tell anyone my secret!”

    Little Girl: “Okay!”

    (After her mom pays for their things, the little girl turns and waves before they leave.)

    Little Girl: “By Miss the Doctor’s Companion! Beware the Daleks!”

    (Best customers ever!)

    Fools Give Vent To Their Rage

    | Portland, OR, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Hotels & Lodging, Movies & TV, Rude & Risque

    (We have a full house of baseball teams, 14-16-year-old boys. At approximately 11 pm, a mother comes up to the front desk.)

    Mother: “Why is there pornography on channel 16? We obviously didn’t order anything!”

    (We don’t have the option to order movies or pornography, so we look up what channel this was and find out it’s our [Cable Channel] channel playing a movie called ‘Erotic Engagement.’)

    Me: “Ma’am, that is our premium channel [Cable Channel], which is commonly known for playing adult themed movies this late at night. Our suggestion would be to keep an eye on your team as to not be watching [Cable Channel] this late at night.”

    Mother: “That is not [Cable Channel]. That is graphic pornography. You either refund my stay or we will check out right now.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I understand your frustration, but again, we do not have pornographic channels—”

    Mother: “You obviously don’t know what you are talking about and now my child is scarred for life. I hope you are happy and I hope God strikes you down for your disregard for protecting us from that filth!”

    Me: “Proverbs 29:11, if you want to get biblical. Have a nice night, ma’am.”

    (The scripture states: ‘Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.’)

    They Don’t Charge Extra For Time

    | UK | Math & Science, Movies & TV

    Customer: “Two tickets to see [Film] this evening, please.”

    Me: “Of course. Would you like to watch in 2D or 3D?”

    Customer: “Oh, I wish you had 4D, too, That would be cool!”

    Me: “Well, technically, since films are moving images our 3D films are 4D. They move through time!”

    Customer: “The fourth dimension!”

    Page 1/3412345...Last