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    Category: Movies & TV

    In Good Companion Company

    | Robeline, LA, USA | Family & Kids, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV

    (I have two piercings in each ear and am wearing some very geeky earrings. Customers keep commenting on one pair, Nintendo controllers, but are confused as to what the other pair is. Until a young girl, who is maybe six, comes in with her mom.)

    Little Girl: *wide eyed* “Is that a Tardis!?”

    Me: *smiling* “Yes, it is! No one has figured it out all day.”

    Little Girl: *excitedly* “Does that mean you’re the Doctor?!” *to her mom* “Is the Doctor a girl now?!”

    Mom: *sternly* “No, the Doctor isn’t a girl.”

    Little Girl: *sadly* “Oh…”

    Mom: *brightly* “But that just means she’s his companion!”

    Little Girl: “OH!” *grins* “Yeah! The Doctor does like gingers, doesn’t he?”

    Me: *putting a finger to my lips* “Shh! Don’t tell anyone my secret!”

    Little Girl: “Okay!”

    (After her mom pays for their things, the little girl turns and waves before they leave.)

    Little Girl: “By Miss the Doctor’s Companion! Beware the Daleks!”

    (Best customers ever!)

    Fools Give Vent To Their Rage

    | Portland, OR, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Hotels & Lodging, Movies & TV, Rude & Risque

    (We have a full house of baseball teams, 14-16-year-old boys. At approximately 11 pm, a mother comes up to the front desk.)

    Mother: “Why is there pornography on channel 16? We obviously didn’t order anything!”

    (We don’t have the option to order movies or pornography, so we look up what channel this was and find out it’s our [Cable Channel] channel playing a movie called ‘Erotic Engagement.’)

    Me: “Ma’am, that is our premium channel [Cable Channel], which is commonly known for playing adult themed movies this late at night. Our suggestion would be to keep an eye on your team as to not be watching [Cable Channel] this late at night.”

    Mother: “That is not [Cable Channel]. That is graphic pornography. You either refund my stay or we will check out right now.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I understand your frustration, but again, we do not have pornographic channels—”

    Mother: “You obviously don’t know what you are talking about and now my child is scarred for life. I hope you are happy and I hope God strikes you down for your disregard for protecting us from that filth!”

    Me: “Proverbs 29:11, if you want to get biblical. Have a nice night, ma’am.”

    (The scripture states: ‘Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.’)

    They Don’t Charge Extra For Time

    | UK | Math & Science, Movies & TV

    Customer: “Two tickets to see [Film] this evening, please.”

    Me: “Of course. Would you like to watch in 2D or 3D?”

    Customer: “Oh, I wish you had 4D, too, That would be cool!”

    Me: “Well, technically, since films are moving images our 3D films are 4D. They move through time!”

    Customer: “The fourth dimension!”

    Getting All Theatrical About It

    | Albuquerque, NM, USA | Crazy Requests, Movies & TV

    (I work at a movie rental place and this is a conversation that I had with a customer and her son the other day. A customer comes walking up to the register. He is about 13.)

    Customer: “I am looking for a movie to rent.”

    Me: “Okay. What is the title and I will look it up?”

    Customer:Oculus.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but that movie will be in theaters Friday.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay.”

    (He walks away. Few minutes later he comes back and asks for another movie.)

    Me: “What movie are you looking for?”

    Customer:The Purge: Anarchy.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but that movie hasn’t even come out in theaters yet.”

    (The customer walks away. A few minutes later I am helping someone else and the same customer walks back up and starts talking to another associate. I overhear him ask for another movie.)

    Customer: “I am looking for The Quiet Ones.”

    Other Associate: “Okay, let me look that up for you.”

    (I mention to the associate and the customer that that movie has not come out yet in theaters. The customer walks away. A few minutes later the boy comes back up with his mom.)

    Mother: “I want to talk to a manager.”

    Me: “That’s me. How can I help you?”

    Mother: “I have sent my son up here three times looking for movies and every time he tells me that you do not have it and that they are coming out in theaters.”

    Me: “I understand, ma’am, but those movies have not come out yet and because they have not come out we do not have a release date for the DVDs. I do apologize for that. Is there another movie that you are looking for that I can help you find?”

    Mother: “NO. I WANT THOSE MOVIES AND I DEMAND THAT YOU GET ME THE DVD COPIES OF THOSE!”

    (At this point I am taken aback that she is yelling at me to get her the DVD copies of movies that have not even been released in the theaters.)

    Me: “I am sorry but there is no way for me to do that.”

    Mother: “Well, how can you offer to rent out the newest movies if you do not have them? I see the commercials on the TV so that must mean that you have them. I bet they are in your back room and you just don’t want to walk back there and get them.”

    Me: “I am sorry, but we do not have them. There is nothing that I can do for you. You can go see the movies in the theaters or if you want the DVD copies then they usually release them a few months after it has left the theaters. That is all that I can suggest.”

    Mother: “You are no help. Your customer service skills suck, and I hope you are happy because my son really wanted to see these movies and now you are letting him down. I hope you feel like s***!”

    (She demands the number to our corporate office and my name.)

    Me: “Here is the number and my name. I again apologize that you are unhappy with our store but there is nothing that I can do.”

    (She headed towards the exit, complaining how we don’t help customers and don’t have movies.)

    You Can Do It, Put Your Butt In To It

    | Oklahoma City, OK, USA | Movies & TV, Rude & Risque, Technology

    (I work at a call center for a satellite TV company. I am speaking with a male customer who speaks in a slightly feminine voice.)

    Customer: “I need credit for this movie I ordered.”

    Me: “Was something wrong with the movie, sir?”

    Customer: “No. But I didn’t mean to order it. I just sat on my remote and it ordered the movie.”

    (I hear a voice in the background similar to the customer’s voice.)

    Background Voice: “You always did have a talented butt.”

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