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    Category: Movies & TV

    Needs A Stark Explanation

    | France | Crazy Requests, Movies & TV

    (I work at a small movie theater, selling tickets. We are on a slow day one month before the first “Iron Man” movie’s theatrical release. A tired looking man in his 50s shows up at the register.)

    Me: “Hello, sir, how can I help you today?”

    Man: *Looking right thru me*Iron Man!”

    Me: “Oh, you want to see the upcoming Iron Man movie? I am sorry but this title will only be released next mo…”

    Man: “Iron Man!”

    Me: “I am sorry, sir, but you may be too early to see Iron Man. This movie is not released in France yet. It isn’t even scheduled for now. The movies planned today are…”


    (At this point, I don’t know if I am upset or amused by this ridiculous situation.)

    Me: “Again, sorry, sir. This title will not be screened before next month.”

    Man: “I want to see Iron Man!”

    Me: “Yes, you stated that clearly.”

    (For half a minute, we stare at each other awkwardly.)

    Man: “How many for Iron Man?”

    Me: *exasperated* “I CANNOT sell you tickets for a show that IS NOT scheduled yet.”

    (My manager, working in a room nearby, must have heard me raise my voice. He stormed out of his office and takes me away from the register.)

    Manager: *quietly to me* “You must inform and serve the customer with respect. Go on break. I take care of him”

    Me: “Seriously…”

    Manager: *To the customer* “Sorry about that. How can I help you?”

    Man: “Iron Man!”

    (I decided to take my “break” in the room nearby. I heard my manager struggling to explain over and over again that Iron Man was not screened today. The customer finally left and my confused manager apologized to me.)

    Isn’t Sold On The Concept Of Sold Out

    | NY, USA | Movies & TV

    (A customer comes in on a busy Wednesday night with five people, looking to see a Bollywood film playing only at one theatre in the tristate area.)

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like five for [Bollywood Film] at 7:45.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, miss, but that film is sold out. It actually sold out over two hours ago. But we have a 9:45.”

    Customer: “What! You don’t even have five seats left?!”

    Me: “No, it is sold out.”

    Customer: “How come?”

    Me: “Well, it is a popular film, and usually movies in the 5:30 to 8:30 bracket are the most popular times.”

    Customer: “But how did they all sell out? It is an hour before!”

    Me: “Well, people bought their tickets online and in advance. If you’d like, I can sell you five to the 9:45 show. We still have plenty of seats right now.”

    Customer: “No. I want five to the 7:45 show.”

    Me: “But it is sold out.”

    (After a few more minutes of this and an announcement over a bullhorn that we were sold out of the 7:45 show she leaves. About an hour passes and she comes back.)

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like five to the 9:45 show of [Bollywood Film].”

    Me: “Unfortunately the 9:45 show is now sold out.”

    Customer: “But you told me you had plenty of seats!”

    Me: “That was an hour ago, though. It sold out about 15 minutes ago.”

    Customer: “You lied to me! I’d like to speak to your manager.”

    Me: “Not a problem.”

    (I called the manager, at which point he tried explaining the same thing to her. No matter how many times we explained to her the concept of sold out she didn’t seem to understand it.)

    Regina Phalange Calling

    | Derbyshire, England, UK | Bizarre, Funny Names, Movies & TV

    (My dad works in TV licensing, the main role of which is issuing warnings to people who haven’t paid their licenses. This exchange takes place as he’s reading back a form to a suspected license fraud filled in earlier in the day.)

    Dad: “I think this either made the stupidest attempt not to get caught ever or she’s taking the p***.”

    Me: “Why?”

    Dad: “Well, under ‘name’ she’s put ‘Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock.'”

    (I crack up, recognising the ‘Friends’ reference.)

    Dad: “Hey, I’m the one who has to go back and sort this!”

    Me: “Okay, here’s what you need to do…”

    (I tell my dad a few ‘Friends’ quotes to slip into conversation, to make it clear he knows what she’s doing. Apparently she paid up (under her real name) as she didn’t think anyone would remember that show!)

    Gives You A Nice Long Rest

    | Atlanta, GA, USA | Love/Romance, Movies & TV

    (Our lobby has restrooms on opposite ends. I’m behind concessions helping a customer when we both notice a man leave his auditorium and going to the restroom on the opposite side.)

    Customer: “That was my husband. He doesn’t know there’s a restroom on the other end.”

    Me: “Are you ever going to tell him that?”

    Customer: “If he’s smart, he’ll figure it out… which means he never will.”

    Are You Sitting Uncomfortably?

    | NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Movies & TV

    (Our theater has electric recliner-style chairs. They’re very nice, but they are often broken by guests who mistreat them, and so we’re constantly having to fix them. I’m returning from my lunch break, when I see an elderly couple confronting a petite, teenaged coworker of mine. Despite being in their 70s, the husband is HUGE and looks like he could easily overpower everyone there.)

    Wife: “My husband is usually a peaceful man! But you’ve pushed him, and now he needs closure and needs you to pay!”

    Husband: *fuming* “I’m gonna have someone’s head!”

    Coworker: “I’m sorry… What is the issue?”

    Wife: “You know what it is!”

    Coworker: “I apologize, ma’am. Let me call a manag—”

    Wife: *interrupting* “YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!”

    (I rush over and get a manager, who approaches them. I hear the husband and wife screaming on and off for the next five minutes, before they leave, making sure to announce loudly they’re “never” coming back to this theater, and telling every… single… person they can that we’re “cruel” and “worthless” thieves.)

    Manager: *walking up to me* “Well… that was interesting…”

    Me: “What was going on?”

    Manager: “Someone must have broken one of the seats in the screening before those customers, because his seat was stuck permanently reclined, and it hurt his back trying to lay down in it.”

    Me: “Oh, were there no other seats that he could switch to? Why didn’t they just have someone come in to fix the chair?”

    Manager: “That’s the thing. I just checked, and they were the ONLY ones there. There was literally about 100 empty seats around them… He just decided that he wouldn’t switch seats, and then got mad because the one seat he picked happened to be the one broken one.”

    Me: “And that’s our fault, somehow?”

    Manager: “Sadly, that’s not even in the top-five of dumbest thing we’ve been blamed for by angry guests this week…”

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