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    Category: Money

    Your Degree Doesn’t Add Up To Much

    | Glasgow, Scotland, UK | Math & Science, Money

    Me: “Sir, a drink costs £1.85 and you’ve given me £1.70.”

    Customer: “So, that’s not enough?”

    Me: “It’s a good start…”

    Customer: “But I study mathematics!”

    Less Is More, More Or Less, Part 3

    , | Omaha, NE, USA | At The Checkout, Money

    (Our store regularly runs a promotion on the various vitamin brands for ‘BOGO’, buy 1, get 1 free. A customer comes up to the register with a bottle of a brand on the BOGO promotion. I am also an avid couponer and I regularly take in coupons for items we carry that I won’t use so that I can give them to customers.)

    Me: “Sir, I see you’re buying a [brand] item. This week we currently have this whole line at Buy One, Get One Free. If you do get another one, I also have a coupon I can give you which is good for $2 off two items. So instead of getting one for $9.99 you can get 2 for eight bucks and change.”

    Customer: *quite angrily* “What the h*** is wrong with you people? I just want my vitamins. Why are you always trying to push me to buy extra stuff and give you more money!?”

    Me: “I’m…sir, I apologize. I probably wasn’t clear you’ll get twice as many vitamins and spend two dollars less—”

    Customer: “Oh f*** this. You’re all scam artists!” *storms off without paying*

    Me: *stares in disbelief*

    Next Customer:“So…can I use that coupon?”

    Related:
    Less Is More, More Or Less, Part 2
    Less Is More, More Or Less

    Two Heads, Half A Brain

    | Oshawa, ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Money

    (Two teenage girls, about fifteen years old, are in my store trying to buy perfume. On the counter, there are two bottles of our store brand perfume beside each other. There is a small bottle and there is a large bottle.)

    Me: “So, the large bottle is $25.00 and the small bottle is $15.00.”

    Customer #1: “Which bottle is the small one?”

    Me: *confused* “The smaller one of these two.”

    Customer #1: “Oh…”

    (The girls wander around the store and comment on how cute our sandals are.)

    Me: “Our sandals are really nice. They’re actually buy one, get one half off.”

    Customer #2: “What do you mean?”

    Me: “You buy one pair of sandals, and you get the second pair half off.”

    Customer #2: “Wait, what?!”

    (The girl looks at me genuinely confused. At this point, I have no other way to explain buy one get one half off, so I just repeat what I said.)

    Me: “You buy one pair of sandals, and you get the other for half the price.”

    Customer #1: “I don’t understand…”

    (The girls eventually give up. As they walk out of the store, I overhear them talking to each other.)

    Customer #1, to Customer #2: “I don’t get what ‘Buy one, get one half off’ means!”

    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 5

    | Omaha, NE, USA | Money

    (I work at grocery store that happens to be running a sale on milk. I overhear another customer arguing with his spouse.)

    Man: “Okay. We need a gallon of milk.”

    (He reaches for the gallon jugs that are priced at $3.59.)

    Woman: “Honey, the half gallons are on sale. They’re 10 for $10.00.”

    Man: “That makes no sense.”

    Woman: “Just grab two half gallons.”

    Man: “But that’s more expensive.”

    Woman: “No, they’re 10 for $10, while a gallon is $3.59. We don’t have to buy ten for the discount.”

    Man: “That’s ridiculous.”

    Me: “Look at it this way: You can buy a one gallon jug of milk for $3.59 or two half-gallon jugs for $2.00. It still equals one gallon.”

    Man: *confused*

    (The woman and I just exchange glances and shake our heads.)

    Related:
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 4
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 3
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 2
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up

    Pay Me Up, Scotty

    | South Carolina, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

    Caller: “I would like to make a reservation.”

    Me: “Sure, we require a one night advance deposit to reserve a room. What type of card will you be using?”

    Caller: “I would like to pay that in cash.”

    Me: “I am sorry, sir. I am unable to take a cash payment over the phone.”

    Caller: “I called yesterday and was told that you accept cash.”

    Me: “That is correct, sir, we do accept cash. However you must be present to pay cash.”

    Caller: “But I have the cash right here!”

    Me: “I am sorry, sir, I am unable to take cash through the phone. I will either need a credit card number, or you are more than welcome to come to the hotel when you arrive and pay cash.”

    Caller: “Ugh, fine. Here is my credit card number!”

    Related:
    Fax Me Up, Scotty

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