November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Money

Minimum Spend, Maximum Satisfaction

| Boston, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Books & Reading, Criminal/Illegal, Money

(I work at a small bookstore. We have a credit card minimum. I get so sick of people telling me that this is illegal that I look up the legislation a few months ago. A woman brings a greeting card to the front.)

Me: “$2.66, please.”

Woman: *hands me a credit card*

Me: “Do you happen to have cash? We have a $7 minimum.”

Woman: *gleefully angry* “Oh! That’s against the law young man, and I’ll be reporting you!”

Me: “Actually, it’s not.”

Woman: “Yes, it is! What’s the name of this business?!”

Me: “2010 house resolution 4173, also known as the Dodd-Frank act, says we can set up to a $10 minimum as long as it’s consistent between issuers. It’s on page 698. And the name is [Store].”

Woman: “You’re a little smart a**.” *throws greeting card on the ground and walks away*

At A Complete Price Loss

| SC, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

(I work in a clothing store popular with teens and young adults. While we are in the middle of our biggest sale of the year, all prices are CLEARLY marked. Some items are marked with a percentage while others have an actual dollar value. There is no sign anywhere in the store saying that everything is 40% off.)

Customer: “So, are the denim jackets 40% off?”

Me: “I’m not sure, but I can check for you if you’d like to bring one up.”

Customer: “But the sign said they were 40% off.”

Me: “Oh, the sign right above the jacket? The,n yes, that would be the price. But if you’d like, I can double-check that for you on the register.”

(Customer walks away, looking around for a moment before bringing up one of the jackets. I scan it and tell him the price.)

Me: “It’s going to be $32.”

Customer: “But the sign says $35…”

Me: “It must be mis-signed. The register says it’s $32.”

Customer: “But the sign says $35.”

Me: “Yes, but you’ll only have to pay $32. We probably just missed the sign when the prices changed.”

(At this, the customer gives me a confused look before taking the jacket and walking away to put it up before walking out of the store.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 42

| USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Money

(The customer in question is trying to purchase just under $300 worth of material. Their card declines.)

Customer: “Oh, I’m sorry. Let me go outside and call my bank.”

(Comes back in a few minutes later on the phone.)

Customer: “Can you take a check over the phone?”

Me: “Do you mean a credit card?”

Customer: “No, a check. Like if I give you all the information off it can you take it over the phone?”

Me: “…No. I can’t take a check over the phone, sorry.”

(His wife shows up 15 minutes later with a check. I run in through our machine just to be safe. It is also declined.)

Me: “Sorry, your check was also declined. I’ll only be able to take cash as payment.”

Customer: “I don’t understand why it won’t go through! We just deposited $30,000 yesterday!”

Me: *trying to hide my skepticism* “I’m sorry for the trouble. Sometimes banks can be troublesome. Maybe you should call them again?”

(They went outside to ‘call their bank’ but ended up leaving in their new SUV, and new trucking pulling their new trailer.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 41
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 40
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 39

Stupid By Half

| GA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Money

(A customer comes up with two separate checks. The server put one dinner on the first check but should have been on the second check. Not a problem… or so we thought.)

Customer #1: “This dinner wasn’t supposed to be on my ticket.”

Me: “Okay, not a problem. I’ll just deduct it and move it over to the other ticket.”

(Customer #2 hands me her ticket and I make the changes. When the changes are done…)

Customer #1: “Now, I want to pay for my ticket and half of that plate you just put on [Customer #2]’s ticket…”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 41

| USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

(I take a catering order over the phone.)

Me: “Would you like to pay tomorrow when you pick it up or would you like to give me a credit card number now?”

Customer: “I’ll give you my credit card number.”

(She gives me her number.)

Customer: “And could I have the total?”

Me: “Well, I actually have only written the order down. If you really need the total now I can ring in your order but it will take a moment. You’d have to hold or I’d have to call you back.”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to have the total, obviously, if I’m going to be charged for it today. You know, I can’t just have charges to my card without knowing how much it will be.”

Me: “Actually, ma’am, the charge won’t go through until the day of. Your number will just be attached to your order in our system and the charge will be applied after we ensure that you get your order.”

Customer: “Oh, no, I don’t want it to be stored in the system. That’s not safe! Never mind, I’ll just pay for it tomorrow!”

Me: “…Well, that’s fine, too! It may just take a minute or so for you to be rung out tomorrow if it’s busy when you arrive to pick up your order, just so you know.”

(I decided not to bother clarifying that she had just given me her number which I wrote down, or that our systems were obviously designed to encrypt credit card numbers so that they could not be stolen, considering we were a business that dealt with thousands of credit cards daily, OR that every single credit card, including the one she would use the next day, was stored in our system anyway in order for us to receive customers’ payments because that’s how credit cards work.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 40
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 39
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 38