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  • Always Time For A Rhyme
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  • Category: Money

    Causing Infractions With Customers

    | PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

    Customer: “Give me about half pound of the all-beef salami.”

    Me: “Sure thing, ma’am.”

    (I slice up the salami. I’m usually pretty good at eyeballing the weight of a product, but when I put the sliced salami on the scale, it’s pretty underweight.)

    Customer: “I think that will be enough. Is that less than a half pound?”

    Me: “Yes, it’s about four-tenths.”

    (The customer gives me a blank look.)

    Me: “Four-tenths of a pound.”

    Customer: “I don’t understand what that means.”

    (The customer looks to her husband for help, but he looks as perplexed as she does and just shrugs.)

    Customer: “Are you sure it’s less than half a pound?”

    Me: “I’m positive, ma’am.”

    Customer: “I don’t know…”

    Me: “A half is five-tenths, right? Four-tenths is less than five-tenths.”

    Customer: “I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”

    Me: “Okay, uh, well… what’s worth less, forty cents or fifty cents?”

    Customer: “There’s no way all that salami only costs fifty cents!”

    (She did eventually buy the four-tenths of a pound of salami at the listed price, though I doubt either she or her husband were convinced it was less than half a pound.)

    Hard-To-Please-Her Scrooge

    | BC, Canada | Awesome Customers, Holidays, Money, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s nearing Christmas time, and I am working at the till to cover a coworker’s break. I start to ring through a man’s groceries. Behind him is an old lady, whom I recognize as being a regular. She is always grumpy.)

    Man: *quietly* “And I’d like to pay for her stuff, too.”

    (I laugh.)

    Man: “No, really.”

    Me: “Oh! Okay.”

    (This has never happened to me before. I look over at the lady’s packages and enter them manually, rather than scanning them, and tell the man his new total.)

    Man: “Don’t tell her until after I’m gone.”

    Me: “Okay.”

    (I finish the transaction, hand him his receipt, and tell him to have a good day. Just as he is about to leave, he drops his wallet. All his cards spill out everywhere, and he has to stop and pick them all up. I put the old lady’s packages in bags and hand them to her.)

    Me: “Here you go!”

    Old Lady: “What do I owe you?”

    Me: “It’s taken care of.”

    Old Lady: “What?”

    Me: “It’s paid for.”

    Old Lady: *scowling* “Who did that?”

    (The man is still trying to cram cards back into his wallet without dropping his groceries.)

    Me: “Um… him.”

    (The old lady starts scowling at him.)

    Old Lady: “Why did you do that?”

    Man: “Well, it’s Christmas. Merry Christmas.”

    (He finally manages to tuck his wallet away and leaves.)

    Old Lady: “I know I’ve seen that jerk around somewhere!”

    Closed Store, Open Kindness

    | NC, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Money

    (We close in five minutes and since it has been a slow night, my coworker and I have turned off the lights in the cases and wrapped the pastries. A customer walks in and my coworker turns on the lights in the cases.)

    Customer: “Are you closed?”

    Me: “No, sir. We close in just a few minutes.”

    Customer: “Oh! I’m so sorry. I just need to pick up some coffee beans and dessert. I’ll be fast!”

    Me: “Don’t worry, you’re okay.”

    (I get his coffee beans while my coworker cuts him a slice of cake. She goes to the back to wash the knife while I ring him up.)

    Me: “Your total is [total.]”

    Customer: “Here you go.” *hands me his credit card* “I am so sorry; I thought you closed at 9:00.”

    Me: “It’s no problem, really.”

    (He looks into the tip jar, which is empty because we have already split the tips.)

    Customer: “Oh, your tip jar is empty. Well here, you two can split this.” *drops money into jar*

    Me: “Thank you, have a good night!”

    Customer: “You too!”

    (I expected a dollar in the tip jar, but it was a $10 bill!)

    The Gift Card That Keeps Giving

    | Greeley, CO, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Holidays, Money, Theme Of The Month, Top

    (I am working the register over Christmas.)

    Me: “Find everything today?”

    Customer: “Yup.”

    (Note: she is silent through the transaction, which includes a gift card.)

    Me: “How much would you like on this?”

    Customer: “Oh, sorry. Can I have $150?”

    Me: “No problem.”

    Customer: *after paying* “Can you do me a favor?” *she hands me the gift card* “The next customer you see that you think could use this, could you give it to them?”

    Me: *stunned* “…Of course!”

    (After a minute another customer comes up, a visibly upset young woman.)

    Me: “Hi! How are you?”

    Customer #2: “I’m okay, thanks.”

    (Clearly she is not ok, but she is trying very hard to be pleasant. She is getting very basic items: milk, bread, eggs, etc. Nothing very festive.)

    Me: “So your total comes out to $0.00.”

    Customer: “What?”

    Me: “The person before you gave me a $150 gift card to use for the next person I thought could use it. You look like you’re having a rough day, so here are your groceries, and there’s about $130 left on this card.”

    (The customer just started crying. Once she could, she thanked me about 100 times. Made my whole Christmas season.)

    Loony Over A Toonie

    | QC, Canada | Canada, Money, Tourists/Travel

    (The tourist shop where I work accepts US dollars; however, we can give change only in Canadian money. As we are in Quebec, my coworkers speak mostly French, but English is my first language.)

    Co-worker: *in French, to me* “Can you come explain to this guy why we can’t give him American change? He’s pretty upset, and my English isn’t good enough for me to understand him. He bought an ice cream sandwich and an ice cream cone, and his wife already walked off with the cone.”

    (The customer is an older gentleman, probably in his 60s or 70s, neatly dressed.)

    Me: “Okay.” *to customer, in English* “Sir, we can’t give out American change because we don’t maintain an American cash drawer. We only have whatever US money other people have already paid with, so we can’t guarantee exact change.”

    Customer: “Well, why do you take American money if you don’t give it back?”

    Me: “We accept American money as a service to our customers, so that you can still make purchases even if you haven’t changed your money yet.”

    Customer: “Service?! Yeah, right!”

    Me: “It is a service, sir. As we are in Canada, we are not obligated to accept American money. But if we hadn’t accepted your money, you wouldn’t have been able to purchase the ice cream you wanted. We’re doing something we don’t have to do, in order to help you out. That’s a service.”

    Customer: “Well, just take back the stuff I bought and give me my $10 bill back, then!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I cannot give you a refund for a product that has already been consumed.”

    Customer: “The ‘product’ has not been ‘consumed’!”

    (The customer points to the ice cream sandwich still on the counter, but the ice cream cone he bought is nowhere to be seen.)

    Me: “Your receipt shows you also purchased an ice cream cone, which I don’t see here. I’m told your wife left with it; I assume she’s eaten it by now?”

    Customer: “You know, you should have warned me before you took my money that I wouldn’t get American change back!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. But when you travel in a foreign country, it’s assumed that you will not be able to use the money of the country you came from, but will have to, at some point, use the money of the country that you’re in. I don’t see how your being given Canadian change while you are in Canada is something you should be warned about.”

    Customer: “Just give me my money back!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I can’t give you your money back, and I can’t give you American change. There’s nothing more I can do for you.”

    Customer: “There’s nothing you can do?! Well, I tell you what!” *shoves his Canadian change across the counter at me* “You just take that and you stick it wherever it fits best!”

    Me: “Okay, sir!”

    (I drop his change in the tip jar.)

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